Dating someone with Borderline Personality Disorder

Postby cg3191 » Sat Aug 13, 2011 5:37 am

OK, I need people's opinions because I'm confused.

Basically I started talking to this guy (we'll call him Joe) on facebook. He lived in the dorm next to me the year previously (i'm in college, obviously), so I DID know him lol. We weren't friends, but we knew each other. So, he randomly starts messaging me on facebook and I ask him how he is and whatnot. He was always extremely intelligent, VERY artistic and creative, VERY good at writing, very intuitive, and all around just extremely interesting (from my perspective). But, he also has severe depression. A few shitty things happened to him, and he began abusing hallucinogens, and ended up in rehab. This is why we were only talking on facebook.

So he started telling me all these problems, and eventually asked if I wanted to start dating when he got home. I said sure. We talked everyday, and we grew to really like each other. He started sending me hearts and things like that. We went on one date, and he texted me after saying how he had such a great time and I looked beautiful, etc. Then he texts me two days later saying that some girl he liked in high school came out and said she liked him, so they're going to start dating and he feels bad seeing two girls at once. I was kind of pissed, but whatever, he'd known this girl longer than me. We still talked almost every other day.

This girl breaks up with him a month later, which brings us to this week. Within this month, I began talking to another guy. So Joe starts texting me that he had always liked me, we had so much in common, i'm not like the other girls, i'm the only girl he likes talking to because the others are so predictable (its true- we do share all the same interests, and I am quite a tomboy, but still attractive- so i found this believable). He said he wanted to start hanging out again, and I said we could as friends. He continued telling me how cute I am, talked about philosophy and life, how much he likes me, was sending hearts and stuff. He made several plans with me for later that week. I eventually admitted that I had been talking to another guy the previous month, but said I'd stop, and I told Joe that I liked him too and had always had a crush on him. He just said, 'haha'.

I texted him to see if he wanted to hang out the next day and he ignored me. I texted him yesterday (2 days later) to see if he wanted to still see each other and he just said "yeah we can hang out more. I just feel awkward talking to you as more than a friend, i don't know why". I just said okay, and hasn't contacted me since (before he wanted to hang out everyday).

I was really weary to start talking to him again because of what happened before, so I didn't get too attached. I mainly just kind of embarrassed that I told some guy I liked him and he abandoned me right after. I know he has borderline personality disorder and depression. So... any insight, advice, etc for this situation?
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#1

Postby Datura » Sun Aug 14, 2011 12:16 am

It would be wise to avoid dating someone with that disorder.
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