1 Year Without Weed

Postby shodan6920 » Wed Feb 22, 2012 9:35 pm

As of tomorrow, I'm officially 365 days clean. It was far from easy, but I did it!

I'm in a far better place mentally and physically. My mental clarity is 100%, I no longer get lost half way through a sentence/conversation and forget what i was saying, I am 10 times more positive than I was before, my memory has returned 100%, I now become naturally happy and excited again and I'm completely in touch with all my emotions - something that I thought I would never be again at the worst point of my depersonalisation/derealisation. The reality check I had this time last year provided me with the desire to change, and that is what kept me going all this time.

The thing is, unless YOU yourself really want to change; you wont succeed. ( The worst part is most people have to hit rock bottom in their lives until they realise - I know i did) No-one can make you quit weed, or any addiction. Only yourself. Theres a lot of helpful information on preparing to quit knocking around on this site and the rest of the net that is vital to changing your lifestyle - but unless you have the underlying desire and willpower to push yourself and turn your life around and say NO when someone you associate with offers "just one drag cause it won't hurt", you won't last. Plenty of people relapse (I have on 4 occassions) but you gotta pick yourself back up and persevere, its surprising what you can acheive through hard work and determination.

Although the past few months have been tough due to being depressed (split up with my long term gf recently as well as other sh** going off) I've now beaten my addiction for good and I'm now facing my fears head on without the hazy crutch weed provides.

If anyone has any questions you're more than welcome to email me (shodan_6920@yahoo.co.uk).

I won't be posting for a while, recently I've spent too much time sitting at home surfing the net reading posts and while they have been really helpful i havent been actively working on lifting this depression thats hanging on.

Thanks for reading, I hope this post helps others realise they can beat their addiction, no matter how the odds are stacked against them.

No going back now. Me: 1 - Weed: - 0
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#1

Postby missbibbledoo » Wed Feb 22, 2012 10:51 pm

Hi Shodan,

Congratulations that is wonderful. I can't wait till I am a year free, only 26 days at the moment. Thank you for posting your success, it has put a smile on my dial and as you say so worth it. Sorry to hear about your break up but I do believe everything happens for a reason and doors are opening for you. Have you tried taking fish oil for the depression, lots of positive results from studies on it. Willpower is the only way, no one else can do this for us.

Anyway again congratulations, what a fantastic life achievement.:D
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#2

Postby shodan6920 » Wed Feb 22, 2012 11:32 pm

Thanks missbibbledoo!

Yea each day you get closer, it's all in the mind after the initial withdrawals have eased off. Can't believe I've made it, I remember being at your stage n thinking a year is so far away but it's gone fast to be honest.
I take fish oil capsules daily, I haven't noticed any significant change really but I'm continuing with them either way. Exercise is probably way to combat it I think. Can't beat a runners high!

Thanks for your reply, good luck with your quit, you can do it :)
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#3

Postby Hookedonkronik » Thu Feb 23, 2012 2:51 am

Hey man long time smoker here (10 years), basically my entire waking life since the beginning of adolescence, now almost 27.

I quit 2 days ago. I didn't hit rock bottom but I was close. I'm feeling better already I can't wait for the 1-month mark.

Your post is inspirational and one I was specifically looking for (the benefits and feeling of being off for a long time). One thing I REALLY miss are those natural highs/sense of euphoria from nothing but being alive. When you're an addict, you don't get these because you're always getting them from the drug, and then when it wears off, you simply feel like sh**.

So I just wanted to say thank you, your post means more than you may think :)

Also my advice:

start working out. You will feel AMAZING if you don't already.
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#4

Postby shodan6920 » Thu Feb 23, 2012 7:18 am

Hey man thanks for your reply! Wow 10 years is a long time dude, I was smoking for 5 years, since I was 13 (true what they say about it turning your brain into mush if you smoke during your teen years), and it made me near enough psychotic. At one point I thought I must have done some SERIOUS damage with some of the things going through my head, can only imagine how much of a mess I looked to the people I interacted with during that time. A full year of abstaining though it's completely reversed, and I'm back to normal more or less :).

I agree with you on the euphoric feeling that you get from nothing but being alive. People don't understand what they're throwing away by dulling their natural senses with bud. I just woke up, looked outside (sh** English weather albeit) and felt a rush of optimism and excitement, daft as it sounds, but I'm looking forward to living life again.
Good luck with quitting, glad my post has helped you, it ain't gonna be easy at all but stick with it. A day without weed seems impossible when you first quit, let alone a year, but it has gone so quick if im honest, the days soon start to add up. You'll wonder why you ever touched the stuff a year from now!
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#5

Postby TruAffinity » Thu Feb 23, 2012 5:29 pm

That is great, I myself used to be a dope head :) but I went away for a weekend once and got totally wasted, I could not remember the previous night and what I did remember was acting like someone I am not, and doing things I would never do if I was in my right mind!!
Ever since that night I haven't touched it again so I know how proud you must feel. I know smokers will say they can give up easily but it is not easy unless ofcourse, you make a rock solid decision that you will always be in your right mind and not allow your will to be taken from you by a substance.
Again, congratulations and keep it up ;)
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#6

Postby justin92 » Fri Feb 24, 2012 1:15 am

Hi, names justin. i am going through withdrawal right now it sucks. i only smoked for about a year but each day i smoke atleast 5 or 6 blunts with my friends. i quit because everytime i would get high i would have bad anxiety about my heart stopping and just crazy thoughts. the first month i went through depersonalization and derealization but i think im a little over that now for the most part. i still feel odd but not nearly as bad as the first month. i still have anxiety but i can control it without going into a panic attack. i still get headaches and just feel like doing nothing all day. i hope this passes and i can get on with life. any replies would be awesome!
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#7

Postby shodan6920 » Fri Feb 24, 2012 11:12 am

@ TruAffinity - Thanks for your post, youre completely right about making a rock solid decision coz without that that its not possible. Definately not going back now!

@justin92 - Hey man, all your withdrawal symptoms are the same as what mine were, you just gotta hang in there in the early months coz the first 3 months are the ones where you are most likely to relapse. Stay strong mate, theres plenty of decent advice on the site that will keep you going. Try and maintain a positive attitude, coz it really does get better. Keep it up!
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#8

Postby changeforthebetter » Sun Feb 26, 2012 5:50 am

How is your memory? Can you remember the days? And where you put everything down?
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#9

Postby shodan6920 » Mon Feb 27, 2012 10:51 am

Hey, my memory is fine now, you dont notice anything significant day to day in terms of memory improvement but now I can remember what i did all day, where i went, who i spoke to, what i said, what i have planned, where ive put my keys etc with no problem at all.

Shodan6920
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#10

Postby justin92 » Mon Feb 27, 2012 2:26 pm

hey shodan6920, how long did it take for your anxiety to go away?
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#11

Postby void » Mon Feb 27, 2012 5:03 pm

That is Superb!

You can do it.
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#12

Postby changeforthebetter » Mon Feb 27, 2012 5:42 pm

Damn, its depressing to know my memory is f***ed up for good.
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#13

Postby shodan6920 » Tue Feb 28, 2012 9:38 pm

@ justin92 - I can't really pinpoint a day where i woke up and was not anxious, my recovery didn't really work like that unfortunately, but after 6 months & CBT therapy now and again it is significantly reduced, you gotta work at it though and push yourself to face your fears without relying on medication. Now though my anxiety levels are back normal near enough, I dont get panic attacks anymore, but its still something you gotta work on everyday.

@void - Thanks man :)

@changeforthebetter - Your memory ain't f***ed up for good man it just takes time, mines all good now after a full year of no weed.
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#14

Postby Alone_In_My_Dome » Wed Feb 29, 2012 3:10 pm

changeforthebetter wrote:Damn, its depressing to know my memory is f***ed up for good.


yeah - look into "neural plasticity" google it, also check into the mind and life conferences

this will change your mind about the possibility of any mental condition's permanence

we have a lot of agency
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