Moving on

Postby WannaSurvive » Sun Feb 12, 2017 2:51 pm

Well, I have moved out of the home now and after months, if not a year, of emotional and verbal abuse...I'm still struggling to move on.

After all the things that were said and done, she now seems overly happy and supportive. I'm taking this personally perhaps, but I expected her to suffer for what happened on her end. I had responsibility in some of the issues and see that more clearly now but never the less, I suffered some serious blows and attacks. I recognize me not moving on and being far too aware of her state is unhealthy and I'm here to seek some help on how to progress.

it seems on evenings and days I have our child, I find myself wondering what she is doing with her time. She continually posts stuff (cutting those ties now) about moving on and being happy through the hardest things in life. Seeing this feels like a face to me, it's like behind doors I was treated shitty and saw the bad side and online she puts a face on like I was the one that screwed her over.

Any insight is helpful. Like I said, I recognize some of these pains are unhealthy and also that I need to move on and not pay attention to her motives/happiness as much.
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#1

Postby tokeless » Sun Feb 12, 2017 5:46 pm

It's completely normal to feel as you do. You're greiving for your marriage and the wife you thought you'd married for life. Insecurity is common and you'll feel she's doing okay whilst you're not... she will be feeling what she feels but it may be different to you. Perhaps she's putting on a front... who knows. Give yourself time but use it to build your future... join a gym, eat better and connect with others. If she sees you suffering she'll think she's won when nobody has but it may feel that way. Spend quality time with your child... time heals all.
Focus on your actions not hers.
Best wishes
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#2

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Sun Feb 12, 2017 8:01 pm

WannaSurvive wrote: Like I said, I recognize some of these pains are unhealthy and also that I need to move on and not pay attention to her motives/happiness as much.


Great, so take the step and block your visibility to her posts. Stop watching what she is doing.
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