I like and agree with many posts of Richard@DecisionSkills. Richard seems nice, intelligent, smart and helpful to many people on here. But this time I disagree with his definition of a bully as: “A bully is the big kid that intentionally targets the odd, smaller kid during recess.”
A bully does not necessarily have to be a bigger person than the one who is being bullied. Why does someone become a bully? It could be that person was raised/growing up in the mean spirited family/community and learned from what people around him/her had done. A bully can be a small person, but s/he has a powerful mind and knows how to network, gang up and use influence to intimidate and force someone to do what s/he wants.
Bullying happens everywhere: in schools, families, workplaces, governments and society in general.
In school, someone bullies someone else because of the insecure and jealousy. Girls are jealous with some other girl because she is more beautiful and smarter in studying and has better grades. Guys are jealous with some other guy because that guy is smarter also and has more girls liking him. Yes, and there are bullies who target the “odd” because mostly the extroverted ones think the introverted ones are odd or weird. I observed in society that there are more extroverts than introverts. And the extroverts think they are normal ones and the introverts are abnormal; and the “normal” ones like to make fun of the “abnormal” ones.
In the workplace, bullying happens because co-workers/colleagues are competitive with each other and want to climb up the ladder. Someone may want to bribe the management, sweet talk to the leader and gang up to belittle someone who works hard and even has good technical skills but does not know how to socialize. Some new leader bullies some subordinates because those subordinates may have been in the company/corporate for quite a while and know the company inside out and may have better knowledge and skills than the leader. That leader feels insecure working with those subordinates and wants to get rid of them, so s/he can have total power to the rest.
Bullies are like the stepmother in the story Snow White. That stepmother cannot stand anyone who is better than her. And when she looks into the magic mirror on the wall and learns there's Snow White is more beautiful than her, and living somewhere, she tries to find way to kill Snow White, so she can be the “best”.
@KeDon12, you mentioned about the DQ case, I’ve been reading this very interesting link. I don’t know if you know about it? If not, here it is:https://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingP ... 97238.aspx
I’d experienced bullying in my workplace. But I fortunately have a good, engaged employer who investigates everything and makes fair decisions (this is my own opinion; I don’t know about my colleagues’ opinions). I felt very sick and hurt when it was happening. I’m okay now. Try to forget the past. I love my job and want to do my best for the company.
Wish you all the best.