Hello, how are you all ?
I have a very strange problem. I am happily married to a guy who I've loved from the very first moments we met. I completely changed my life because of him. However, I miss my old boyfriends sometimes. Our talks, our time together, that way I felt weird, and adventurous with them, since they were both amazingly cool people and into extreme sports. My ex boyfriends were adventurous and fun, I am a pretty adventurous person myself. I was going rock climbing, long distance hiking, I was travelling a lot, having fun on my own. My husband is not like it. He is handsome, loyal, a wonderful loving man, and I am too. I love him, I wouldnt cheat on him. He even took me to some trips and gives me gifts and flowers, but my freedom and the fun is dead. With my marriage, that fun part of me has died. My husband does not make bad jokes, he is afraid of heights and much more tame. I remember my ex, how we went horseback riding, or how we went to some crazy concerts. My husband is working 14 hours per day, and I understand and respect him. But I suffer, and I cant help it, because i started having arrhythmias, thus Ive gained some physical manifestations of my sorrow. I feel pain in my heart, because I miss the person who I was with my exes and our strange talking. I miss my "crazy" friendships, sudden trips and stupid things in life. I wish to hear from some of my exes. I feel my life would be complete then. But they would think I am in love with them, or want to see them and date them again. But i don't. I just think I would feel that way again, the way I was, if I revived our friendships. But they would either think I love them or want to date them again. Which is not the case. I hope you guys understand me. Because I feel a heavy rock on my heart .