15 years of weed - Day 1 of freedom

#15

Postby naturegirl » Thu Jul 20, 2017 3:04 pm

Hmm? I wrote you yesterday and wanted to know how you were doing. For some reason, it didn't post. So, it is nice to read your post. You were on my mind. Well, I'm on day 4 and I feel pretty good. I think the hardest thing about getting over my pot habit is simply the habit itself. The routine that I had with it. My evenings are tough, but I'm hanging in there. I don't want to let myself down and I know it will take time. I'm glad to see that you are hanging in there. I've been doing crossfit, and I had the biggest knot in my shoulder from working out. I tossed and turned and tossed and turned. I got the chamomile tea and that is a nice way to end the evening. Anyway, I just wanted to check in and say congratulations. With time, everything will hopefully get easier and easier. Cheers!
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#16

Postby StubItOut » Fri Jul 21, 2017 5:26 pm

I'm real close to caving in and picking up a gram just so I can have a smoke tonight. It's been a hard week and I could really do with one. I know im.being weak.

I've got.my.mate hanging on because I'm so torn. Normally I buy in quarter ounces so I'm thinking just a gram to get me a couple of smokes. I feel bad about it. Don't know what to do.
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#17

Postby gsaint28 » Mon Jul 24, 2017 5:13 am

You do know what to do. You're just lost in thought.

Regardless of what you do, it will be a great learning experience.

Promise us this, whatever you decide, you'll come back and report it.

There's no need to hide or be ashamed about smoking here. Smoking is not the devil. You're not a bad boy.

I invite you to consider that not smoking will be a grand step towards your growth. A step that you've not taken before yet.

Find it within yourself to say no - therein lies your breakthrough.
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#18

Postby mrprankies » Mon Jul 24, 2017 5:47 am

I don't think many people break the cycle of addiction on their first attempt. Many of us have been down this road 2, 3, 4, or 10 times. But as of this moment, you are in a state of mind where you know in your heart of hearts that it is not something that you want to do. You are the one in control. If you break, so have we all. But you know exactly how you will feel about it the next day, and you can likely re-trace the exact path that will lead you back here to post again in a month, a year, or a decade--for you have traveled it many times already. If you want to go down that road again, you know the path like the back of your hand. If you want to travel a new path, then the decision is yours to make each and every day.
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#19

Postby JasmineCat » Mon Jul 24, 2017 6:44 am

I spent 15 years of my life getting stoned everyday and then quit about 11 years ago. I think you can do it, it's worth doing it and this is how I stopped thinking about it. You have to stay super busy. Do any chore that needs doing, go on walks, bike rides, to the library, go fishing, golfing, kayaking-- whatever you can do to occupy yourself until you are falling into bed at night totally exhausted. You will not have time for weed, to grow weed, to buy weed or to think about it. And wow---how much money will you save! Reroof your house, build a greenhouse, paint the deck, scrub the kitchen floor, clean out the closet, clean out the garage, walk the dogs. Just stay sooooo busy "you ain't got time for that." Don't sit around playing mental games. The added benefit will be keeping on the move is good exercise for you.
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#20

Postby StubItOut » Mon Jul 24, 2017 7:07 am

Thanks for the replies everyone.

Good news and bad to report. On the day I made that post I didn't smoke and I didn't smoke the day after either.

Yesterday however (sunday - Day 11) my friend rolled me a couple of joints which I smoked.

I don't feel that bad about it. I went 10 days which is an achievement. I haven't bought any so there is still no equipment or weed in the house and I'm happy that this week will be were free.

Ultimately I still enjoy smoking weed. I am Just sick of my life revolving around it and smoking everyday.

My buddy has said he's happy to roll me a couple of smokes every Sunday so for the moment I might take him up on that. Sunday is my day of chilling out anyway so if I keep it to a couple on a Sunday for the moment I won't feel bad and I'm kind of getting the best of both worlds.

Eventually I may just taper off completely and not even be bothered about it on a Sunday either.

We'll see. But for now if I go from smoking 7days a week and clearing a half ounce a month to a couple of joints a week I've got to take the positives out of that.
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#21

Postby gsaint28 » Mon Jul 24, 2017 7:19 am

Great! Be very clear on what your plan is moving forward, as well as the intention.

If the plan is to smoke on Sundays to relax. Then smoke on sundays to relax.

My guess is you'll experience a similar sense of achievement and progress by sticking to any plan you set out.

Whether that plan be quitting cold turkey, or recreating the way you use weed as seen here.

The key here is integrity. Do what you say you're going to do.
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#22

Postby gsaint28 » Mon Jul 24, 2017 7:22 am

Oh, and do acknowledge that you are responsible for not quitting.

There was a part of you that had the intention of quitting, and you broke that promise to yourself.

Simply acknowledge that, and move on with whatever new promise you're committed to.
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#23

Postby StubItOut » Mon Jul 24, 2017 7:53 am

Cheers gsaint.

Yeah I know I set out to quit and I've not achieved that yet. Maybe I will in time who knows.

But the reason for quitting was all to do with my life revolving around the stuff.

Im not going to lie i missed it during my 10 day abstinence. And it got to a point where i was almost mourning the stuff!

Constantly thinking I can never smoke it again was becoming depressing and I was dwelling on the number of days id gone without it. But on the flip side I had a better time with my family during my abstinence which is the most important thing.

I think for me if I were to buy a stash with the intention of smoking only on Sundays it would quickly descend into daily smoking again. But if my mate just hands me a couple of pre rolled joints on a Sunday I will find it easier to stick to it. And when I get the urges inbetween I'll be able to tell.my brain that come Sunday I'll be having a little smoke so hooefully that will stop me getting really hung up on it and the cravings won't drive me as crazy.

I'll keep this thread going and report on my progress because I still believe that I'm achieving something here even if it isn't complete cessation. We will see.
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#24

Postby JasmineCat » Mon Jul 24, 2017 1:38 pm

Hi there, good job on making progress tapering off and eventually quitting. I bet your family enjoyed you being fully present during the week (even though at times you may have gotten a little grouchy). You have a nice friend that will help you out by not having to go out to buy weed. I guess there are actually a few habits to break and one of them is buying or growing it. I am not suggesting leaving your current friends but you may want to think about hanging out with friends who don't smoke at all for awhile. It will make things easier to not be around it. Keep up the good work this week, keep your family in your heart ❤️ to help you stay strong.
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#25

Postby StubItOut » Wed Jul 26, 2017 7:39 am

Habit: 15 years daily smoker
Quantity: 0.5 ounce a month
Daily joints average: 3
Quit day: 14
Days smoking: 1
Joints smoked: 2

Each post will now be set out as above so I can keep track on what exactly I am doing.

The intention is still to quit but for the moment I have to use the tapering method. Some people don't agree but I think if I don't I will give in and revert to old ways.

The fact I smoked a couple of mild joints on day 11 probably stopped me giving up altogether. And the fact that I know I'm likely to do the same again on day 18 is keeping me going this week.

The figures above are just an average based on my recent smoking habit. Obviously in the past when I was younger I was clearing an 8th per day but that was a fair while ago.

But based on those figures I would have smoked roughly 7 grams of cannabis and around 10 grams of tobacco in my 14 days of quitting so far. And the reality is I've smoked 2 week joints instead.

I'm actually very happy with that and although some people may think im letting my brain find a way to smoke in feeling very positive about what I've acheived so far. Of course the ultimate goal is still complete cessation but it's a marathon not a sprint. It's not easy changing the habit of a lifetime!

All the best everybody
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#26

Postby naturegirl » Wed Jul 26, 2017 3:25 pm

StubItOut,
That makes sense to me. The fact that you have drastically reduced the amount that you smoked and are continuing to try to quit is what matters. I completely understand your logic. Don't worry about what other people are saying. You do what feels right for you. I think back to when I had quit for 3 months and then smoked that if I had given myself permission to self medicate and then go back on a streak of quitting that I'd be in a different place right now. Honestly, pot isn't the worse thing in the world. I have just been doing it so long that I don't want it to be a continuous daily habit. I think that there might come a time where I emotionally might think I'll need it and maybe I will smoke. I hope not, but if I do, it doesn't need to be the end of the world. This is a long life time habit. I do need to get the time in where I get used to the habit of not doing it. It's hard. It's a tough subject to discuss right now because there are so many people that are vulnerable. I know how hard it was to quit for you in the beginning. You were having some horrible withdrawal symptoms. You keep going on your streaks and eventually you might reach a point and think to yourself, "You know what. I don't need it right now. I'm going to wait another two weeks."
I read how a chef wanted to quit and he gave himself permission to smoke once a month. Well eventually he was so busy with his life that when that time came, he didn't do it. He didn't feel a need. Again, I understand where your head is at. When you've been doing something for so long, it's hard to just snip it out of your life. If setting those long term goals are helping you, then do it. Maybe on that second week, you can question yourself to whether you need it or not. Who's to say? I'm on day 10 and I'm started to feel more in control, but I tell you, it's hard. I think for myself I'm riding the easy train because it's summer. Once I'm back at work and fully into the whole stress of life that will be the real test. Keep writing. I like to know where your head is at and I'll do the same. Peace out!
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#27

Postby StubItOut » Wed Jul 26, 2017 8:33 pm

Hi naturegirl thanks for visiting my thread again.

And re your comments above, thanks. All i can do is what i feel is right for me at the time im doing it. Maybe some people can just out down the pipe and that be the end of it but thats not how it works for me.

Its real tough as well because i dont smoke cigarettes but i mix my weed with tobacco so im actually quitting weed and nicotine in one go and man its tough.

And yes to what you said about relapsing after 3 months. Thats all i was trying to say when i visited your thread when you were struggling - if you smoke, it does not need to be game over. Its just a bump in the road and we keep going.

On another note, today has been hard. Had strong urges to smoke but i have resisted.

Im also getting some crazy withdrawals which i didnt realise were part of the deal....im itching like mad!! Its really weird. Its been happening for a few days now but at first i thought it was in my head but this evening im itching a lot and its driving me nuts!! I feel like im coming off heroin or soemthing!

Im also eating a lot. Im already about a stone over weight and i cant afford to pile on anymore weight otherwise its a long road back !
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#28

Postby naturegirl » Wed Jul 26, 2017 11:40 pm

Hey, one step at a time! Nicotine withdrawal and weed withdrawal all at once! Ugh. That is a rough road to walk. Get out and exercise. That could simply be a walk. You need to sweat. You need to get that sh** out of your system. I don't know if you have a park near by or some woods that you can go and connect with nature. It helps. It seems like a good scream or cry might help as well. You need to release, and smoking pot isn't the solution.

So, you're feeling itchy. That's interesting because cherrybomb stated that she was having the same itching thing happening. This has to be a mental issue. Do you have health insurance? Maybe check in with a doctor and let them know what's going on? Look, quitting is not going to be easy. I've been tapering off for years. Like I have said, my pot smoking has been an evening thing, so I have a hard time with that period of time. But it is getting easier for me.

As for the eating issue, I was going to write about this. This is my new focus. I eat healthy. I just eat too much and it sucks. I'm going to use an AP on my phone call FitnessPal and start tracking my calories. I could use to lose a few pounds. It's especially tough as we age. I say everything in moderation.

As for you smoking, I know what you were trying to say to me. And again, I know this is a sensitive issue for people because it's so darn hard to quit. I'm just going to encourage you to stay strong and do what you have to do.

I think it is important to focus on the benefits of quitting. Try not to focus on the craving. Instead, think about what you have accomplished. You have to take it day by day. If you crack, well then start over again. It's not going to be easy. One thing I know is that when you do smoke, it makes it ten times harder to get back on track. That's why I encourage you to avoid your smoking friends for a while and try to create some new habits, healthy ones. The whole bummer about this situation is that it can't be fixed over night. It's going to take time and determination. You have to figure out what you want in life. There's a reason why you started this journey. Figure it out. You're going be okay! I'm glad that you are keeping it real. That's the whole purpose of this forum. Be true to yourself and reach out to others for help or advice. Okay, let me know how you're doing. You got this.
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#29

Postby naturegirl » Fri Jul 28, 2017 10:21 pm

Hey what's going on? Check in!
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