10 years

Postby moorofNod0 » Fri Apr 20, 2018 12:58 am

Hi to all,

I have been now 10 years with out a any friends. I do have some friends abroad at my home country but since where I moved 10 years a go I have not able to make any friends. Only an acquaintance here and there. I miss all those things in social life, going out, discussing, hanging out but also having somebody close that I confide with or help in case of need and vice-versa.
I more then half of my 20s alone and I am almost half way through my 30s and I don't want to make it 20 years.
I am shy, lacking in confidence, protective- cautious (this is because people tend to take advantage of me sometimes) , somewhat naive, and introverted.

Any suggestions will be appreciated.

Thank you.
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#1

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Fri Apr 20, 2018 1:28 am

moorofNod0 wrote:Any suggestions will be appreciated.


The absolute best thing you can do is to get off the Internet. Delete social media, delete apps, log off and disconnect.

Digital isolation is not your friend.

Start replacing digital activity with other activities that get you out into the real world.
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#2

Postby Candid » Fri Apr 20, 2018 6:49 am

[quote="moorofNod0"I am shy, lacking in confidence, protective- cautious (this is because people tend to take advantage of me sometimes) , somewhat naive, and introverted.[/quote]

These things are all fixable. There are articles on this forum about self-esteem and confidence. As to being over-cautious, you always choose who you let into your life and who you don't.

You can't change introversion to extraversion, but you could be much more comfortable with being yourself.
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#3

Postby moorofNod0 » Wed Apr 25, 2018 12:51 am

Hi and thank you both for your help.

Richard I don't use any social media: no Fb, no Instagram, no Twitter and none of the above. Except only Whatsapp which I use only to keep in touch with my friends abroad.
I did try in the past to do some activities (social or mundane gathering and a class of martial arts) but they did not help to find any new friends. I guess I can try again some how. On the other side I have a hard time trusting other people.

Candidn where can I find the articles?
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#4

Postby Candid » Wed Apr 25, 2018 6:21 am

Right side of this page: viewforum.php?f=12
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#5

Postby DrPsychFeels » Fri Apr 27, 2018 11:05 pm

Have you thought about church?

If you're not religious, maybe choose one that's more open and progressive, like an interfaith congregation.
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