What does a really quiet person mean to you???

Postby Vicky24 » Sun Sep 10, 2006 11:44 am

I would really appreciate people’s opinions on really quiet people.

Whenever I am around strangers, I just don’t talk. It’s not because I am rude, I just really find it hard to start a conversation with a person. When a person does start speaking to me I will answer them with as few words as possible as I go really red at the drop of a hat.

I have had many jobs, as I leave them because of my really low self esteem and confidence. Because I don’t talk to people, I just do not fit in anywhere that I go.

So, if you meet a really quiet person, what would you think of that person? (Just a shy and quiet person, rude, unfriendly, arrogant, they think that they are better than us as they don’t want to mix with us, etc).

If you try to make conversation with a really quiet person and they only answer with as few words as possible and do not seem to want to actually talk to you, as they don’t continue the conversation. What would you think? (There is no point in trying to talk to this rude person, etc)

Thank you in advance for any replies.

Vicky
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#1

Postby Anybody » Sun Sep 10, 2006 1:11 pm

Now, whenever I meet a quiet person I think "I bet she's like that annoying spammer Vicky from the uncommon forum, never-endingly asking the same damn questions, one after the other, with a different guise on each one. And no one has the heart to tell her to shut up because they are all far too soft hearted."
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#2

Postby kohken » Sun Sep 10, 2006 1:20 pm

Anybody, WTF? we listen to you, have some respect.
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#3

Postby Anybody » Sun Sep 10, 2006 1:21 pm

Whatever...
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#4

Postby Vicky24 » Sun Sep 10, 2006 2:34 pm

Anybody wrote:Now, whenever I meet a quiet person I think "I bet she's like that annoying spammer Vicky from the uncommon forum, never-endingly asking the same damn questions, one after the other, with a different guise on each one. And no one has the heart to tell her to shut up because they are all far too soft hearted."


Then people don't have to read my annoying messages do they, that includes you Anybody.
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#5

Postby Vicky24 » Sun Sep 10, 2006 2:36 pm

kohken wrote:Anybody, WTF? we listen to you, have some respect.


Thank you :D
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#6

Postby kohken » Sun Sep 10, 2006 3:01 pm

Vicky24 wrote:
kohken wrote:Anybody, WTF? we listen to you, have some respect.


Thank you :D


Anytime
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#7

Postby Skybound » Sun Sep 10, 2006 4:11 pm

Hi Vicky!

I immediatlely "feel" if the person is a shy person or if the person doesn´t talk to me because of being rude or just having a bad day. Shy people still have the aura of kindness around them, even if they don´t say much :-)

And when dealing with shy people I like to "bring them out". I might take over most of the talking, but I always make the shy person feel involved in the conversation. I feel a responsibility here and I like the feeling of "helping" un-shying ;-) a shy person. I know how to do it when I have them in front of me. And I notice that shy people are drawn to me because of the way I put them in around the center in a group of people, without them feeling uncomfortble about it.

I think shy people are like all of us deep inside. I can´t say I am shy, but I react/communicate differently depending on who I talk to, doesn´t matter if I know the person well or not. But there are moments when I don´t talk much (belive it or not :lol: ) if I don´t feel comfortable with the other person for some reason.

So, all shy people out there - it´s not always your fault that you are shy or quiet... might be us non-shy people´s fault - at least partly.

Take Care :D
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#8

Postby twisted illusions » Sun Sep 10, 2006 5:47 pm

It all depends on thier attitude thier tone of voice, eye contact etc, usually i think they are shy, but if they sneer and appear confident but dont talk, then i think that they maybe just be rude or stuck up. or maybe they dont know anything about the topic of conversation.
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#9

Postby PeaceSeeking » Sun Sep 10, 2006 8:40 pm

Hi usually shy people attracts me if my energy is low because then it's really comfortable to just sit and relax - not to be expected to "perform" and jump around. Normally however I don't mind, tend to think they are a bit boring because you don't get anything out of the situation. If my energy isn't low I will avoid them - not as if they had a disease I just usually get along better with people who express themselves more. Sometimes it can be ok to lead the conversation with a shy person but it is a energywasting process. Give more receive less. Don't misunderstand, I know they can contribute with something on a deep level - making a point and so forth but there's no entertainment in it.
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#10

Postby kohken » Sun Sep 10, 2006 9:04 pm

see vicky? feel the love. :D
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#11

Postby Brain04 » Mon Sep 11, 2006 4:21 am

It's all about how you go about being quiet, like most others above me have already so knowledgably pointed out. If it's just because you seem to others like you are afraid to talk, then people will normally continue to try to talk to you (at least, someone with a small helping of humanity in them will). However, quiet with an attitude sets people off more than anything else. Even if there is a reason for the attitude to go along with something deeper, normally others don't respond well to it. Quiet people are also usually necessary in a large group of people to give it some sort of "real" feeling to it. Everyone wants that person around to will keep things mellow and enjoyable, but at the same time can surprise everyone with a random comment out of left field. The worst thing that any quiet person can do is try to change, or try to become someone more exciting to not just good friends but to strangers as well. That will be left to those who go without thinking...I've personally always felt much deeper connections with a person who is quiet (myself usually being the person as well), and to me a deep connection is worth a lot more than just a lot of laughs and quick, argumentative conversations.
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#12

Postby yogapossum » Sat Sep 16, 2006 7:25 am

I love shy people! I'm always drawn to them. Conversation is much more relaxed, less pressure to perform. Makes other people feel good and they are fascinating - so much going on under the surface - not like an open book!
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#13

Postby shadybase » Sat Dec 02, 2006 8:14 pm

Still waters run deep.

Just cause i dont say what im thinking doesnot mean that im shy.
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#14

Postby Empty Star » Sat Dec 02, 2006 9:11 pm

I feel for you, Vicky. I know exactly what you mean.

Only today I attempted to make conversation with a waitress in a cafe, it was quiet and she didn't seem busy, she seemed friendly towards me and seemed to open the gates for some small talk. I fumbled my way through a few messed up lines, no doubt showing my shyness to the extreme. I got tongue tied and left, no doubt she thought I was weird or had something wrong with me.

The frustrating thing is that I was so desperate to keep it together and try to engage in some friendly chat but failed miserably. I'm just so tired of living in my own little world, I need to converse with other people and want to so much it hurts but I can't seem to do it.

So after situations like that the feeling of failure runs through you like a bolt of lightning.
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