Blushing

Self esteem - in this over-hyped field it's essential to distinguish fact from fiction.Self confidence - faith in your own abilities is so important in today's high-achieving world.

Postby chris.Bel » Thu Nov 25, 2004 5:17 pm

I'm 24 male, I was asked at work today why i go so red, which prompted me to find something on the net to explain it, so here i am... I've been going red for no reason for about 10 years now and it used to really get to me down years ago and even now i can find my self asking why do I do it, why ? In side i'm the most confident young lad on this planet. but someday's with out much warning, someone can say something or do something and that's it, here I go again and as we all know theirs alway's someone who say ''look how red he's going'' which makes it ten times more of a deal, but i would like to think this can be beaten so for the past six months i've decided to say so what if i go red, so what what people say, it me if that's who i am i'm going to accept it and i really think its working, I always used to go red when talking to my boss, not because i was scared of him, just because it was my boss and now I find my self chatting to him more and more.... I still go red time to time like.
another senario was i'm walking down a street and bump into a old work friend and thats it I'm off, It's such a strange thing who knows why it happens ??????? I have day's and weeks were i don't go red, then weeks and days when i never stop, maybe it's just some kind of chemical/psychological reaction .....

but it's great to see other people understand.
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Postby Mark N » Fri Nov 26, 2004 11:18 am

Hi chris.Bel

so for the past six months i've decided to say so what if i go red, so what what people say, it me if that's who i am i'm going to accept it and i really think its working,


Thats great,
One thing i asked a client to do was to take it one step further, when she found herself blushing i asked her to say to the people in her company "look at me, i'm blushing". It may feel a little strange at first, but eventually that blush can learn that it can't embarrass you any more, because you are no longer trying to hide it.
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Postby sparkles » Thu Mar 10, 2005 10:30 pm

Hello all!
I just found this forum. I am too like you! Yesterday I ran into a girl from high school who I know really liked me and i turned bright red for no reason whatsoever! It is so fustrating. I felt like crying. I feel like the older I get...the worse it gets. And...to be honest...even reading this page makes it a little worst b/c it forces me to think about it. I feel like I only turn red around people I respect. I assume it is related to self esteem. And I have noticed that the more times I put myself in a public situation where I might turn red and don't the better I get at handling the blushing. I read somewhere that acting classes are helpful!? I don't think that I would go as far as surgery but I need to fix this problem!! It prevents me from so many things I would love to do and people I know would like the read me. I just have to conquer the problem!! Any suggestions??? Does anyone know someone who turned their blushing prob around??
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Postby Poni123 » Fri Mar 11, 2005 3:20 am

hey chris.bel i know exactly how you feel. i'm 20, female 2nd year of college and i didnt really start turning red until junior year of high school. i don't turn red in like regular situations only when i feel embarrassed or uncomfortable like when there is a lot of unwanted attention to me then it makes me turn red, but like what usually sets it off is if i run into someone i haven't seen in a while and just for some reason i turn red. it goes away after like 30 seconds when i start talking to them and become more comfortable but as soon as i see them like automatically i go red. i read online that people blush more often than others because of an overly sensitive sympathetic nervous system. like our bodies react to situations more dramatically and defensively than someone else would. it makes sense because different situations affect people in different ways...it just so happens that not so serious situations affect us --- we blush! :oops:
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Postby Gingerly » Sat Mar 12, 2005 5:45 pm

I don't know if this will help, but I have some thoughts on the subject. I used to blush more, and I don't so much, but sometimes it comes back. When I've noticed other people blushing though, I don't give it much thought at all. If anything I think it brightens up their face, gives them a glow, and says they're human, and maybe a bit shy. It also can make someone look more attractive (some women even put blush on their face to appear flushed!!!). Try to just smile when you blush, laugh it off, and take a few deep breaths (this always helped me), and accept that it is part of who you are. It just means that some of the blood is rushing to your face. What if our faces turned polka-dotted at times!!! That would be much worse!!! Since I've changed my attitude towards blushing, I don't really blush as much, cause I guess I don't have so much anxiety towards it. Hope that helps!!
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Postby Poni123 » Sat Mar 12, 2005 9:44 pm

that is a good idea gingerly...like when others blush i'm just kinda like aw they are embarrassed or whatever but then don't give it another thought...when i blush what goes through my head is like OMG i am turning red i feel so stupid i am so embarrassed causing the redness to like stay around longer because it is the only thing i can think about. what i think i forgot to do when i turn red is actually breathe and try to relax, but instead i feel all worked up and nervous. eventually it will go away after i feel more comfortable and relaxed but it is very hard to try and be calm when you know your face is like beat red! it is easy to say like oh i am gonna try and do that when you aren't red, but turning red is an involuntary response, so when it happens it just happens. it is hard to think rationally when you are red because you just feel like you wanna run away.
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Postby Cool » Sun Mar 13, 2005 4:36 pm

I go red all the time, which i cannot stop! even if its nothing to do with me, but someone else could go embarassed, i go instead. I hav only just started doing it, but now i blush in front of my friends and family and i want it to stop... any tips?
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Postby Poni123 » Mon Mar 14, 2005 2:17 am

sorry cool i blush too and have NO tips to give you to make you stop blushing....blushing is an involuntary response so you can't control what happens...i've already mentioned this before but i read online that people blush more often than others because of an overly sensitive sympathetic nervous system. like our bodies react to situations more dramatically and defensively than someone else's would. it makes sense because different situations affect people in different ways...the result for us is that we blush! :oops: just try not to think about it and relax. don't let it control your life and take small steps to getting better.
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Postby Michael Lank » Mon Mar 14, 2005 10:32 am

Blushing is a totally natural, unconscious response; just as some people's hair grows quicker than others, so some people blush more than others.

It's likely that we evolved to blush to display our true emotions, so it's a sign of open, honest emotional display.

Since it's an unconscious response we cannot consciously control it any more than we can control the growth of hair or finger nails. However there are things that we can do to cool down the blushing, and indeed most people who blush will notice that there are times when it's better than at others.

As Poni123 says it's related to the sympathetic nervous system (the part of the nervous system that responds to stress; the parasympathetic nervous system is related to relaxation).

There's some useful tips in this article, you might also like to consider the stop blushing download.

Best wishes.
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Postby chriss » Mon Sep 19, 2005 10:20 pm

i have a really annoying problem at school , in some lessons i seem to go really red , and when i am around certain people it also happens :cry: . it's really frustrating now that it constantly happening , how can i forget about it , i just always think about going red , can i be helped?
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Postby epacheco » Thu Sep 29, 2005 6:55 pm

I have the same problem and it is getting worse as I get older. It started when I was in high school, but has been the worst at my current job for the past 6 months. I blush at the stupidest things!! My boss always makes me blush and I'm sure it's just psychological. I see her coming to my office to ask me probably the most general question and I think about turning red and I do. Just now the old director came in and introduced himself and sure enough I turned red. It drives me crazy and makes me feel like crying afterward. I can talk in front of large groups and it doesn't happen, but introduce me to one person and I'm a tomato. I am such a confident person and outgoing. It makes no sense to me.
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Postby ben.123456789 » Fri Oct 19, 2007 1:02 pm

:oops: :oops: im only in year 7 and i blush really badly when these to girls talk to me i dont have a crush on them or anything but it makes me blush like mad . they no i blush so they do it on purpose and then they laughat me.it alson hapens when ihave to read somthing out and answer a question thats why people call me tomato face. if anyone has any tips please help me .
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Postby ben.123456789 » Fri Oct 19, 2007 1:09 pm

chris.Bel wrote:I'm 24 male, I was asked at work today why i go so red, which prompted me to find something on the net to explain it, so here i am... I've been going red for no reason for about 10 years now and it used to really get to me down years ago and even now i can find my self asking why do I do it, why ? In side i'm the most confident young lad on this planet. but someday's with out much warning, someone can say something or do something and that's it, here I go again and as we all know theirs alway's someone who say ''look how red he's going'' which makes it ten times more of a deal, but i would like to think this can be beaten so for the past six months i've decided to say so what if i go red, so what what people say, it me if that's who i am i'm going to accept it and i really think its working, I always used to go red when talking to my boss, not because i was scared of him, just because it was my boss and now I find my self chatting to him more and more.... I still go red time to time like.
another senario was i'm walking down a street and bump into a old work friend and thats it I'm off, It's such a strange thing who knows why it happens ??????? I have day's and weeks were i don't go red, then weeks and days when i never stop, maybe it's just some kind of chemical/psychological reaction .....

but it's great to see other people understand.
th e
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Postby barryon » Thu Dec 04, 2008 3:40 pm

epacheco wrote:My boss always makes me blush and I'm sure it's just psychological. I see her coming to my office to ask me probably the most general question and I think about turning red and I do. Just now the old director came in and introduced himself and sure enough I turned red. It drives me crazy and makes me feel like crying afterward. I can talk in front of large groups and it doesn't happen, but introduce me to one person and I'm a tomato. I am such a confident person and outgoing. It makes no sense to me.


I have exactly the same problemn. I just came from a meeting and as soon as my boss caught eye contact with me i went bright red, started sweating and even felt a nervous shake in my kneck. I could feel eyes burning into me. I had this before in my last job but after about 7 months it subsided. It really makes me very self concious and i feel it is going to hold me back. I had got rid of it but since i started my new job..........

Outside work i am one of the most confident people in the world. Even my current girlfriend (who i met in my last job) thought i was a shy timid person before she got to know me outside work. I am sick to the teeth of it. If anyone has any advice on how the hell this can be sorted i would love to know. There has to be someone with a solution taht has worked.
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