Overcoming Ambivalence

Psychology-related discussions or questions that don't fit neatly into any other forum.

Postby Introspector » Thu Oct 07, 2010 6:21 pm

Today, I read a rather interesting article titled, 'Why so many people can't make decisions'. The article is on the WSJ - unfortunately, I cannot post a link on this forum.

Recently, I have found myself procrastinating with just about everything that I do - life decisions, work, chores, etc. Reading this article shed some light on exactly why I behave the way that I do.

I know in my mind that I possess great potential. I have the ability, the sense, and the support to accomplish just about anything I want. However, my ambivalence is preventing me from attaining my true potential. I find myself debating choices for so long that I forget to act on them. I overanalyze the advantages and disadvantages of all of the choices I have to make and often end up just not making a choice because I can't pick between the two. I realize that this is something I must overcome in order to attain my true potential and prevent being resentful for the rest of my life.

The question is, how the heck does one overcome ambivalence? Or, at least, how can I eliminate the effects of my ambivalent thinking?
Introspector
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Postby ^_^ » Thu Oct 07, 2010 9:45 pm

That's easy, just make up your mind :p
No, forgive me. I'm just playfully kidding. Are you dealing with allot of important choices? What kind, and what are the things that make it hard to decide?
Also, when it comes to choices like which studies to pick and so on, is there really such a thing as a wrong choice? I mean, I know people make mistakes sometimes. I don't mean it that way, but you make a choice for a reason right? So even if you make a poor decision, you inevitably had to take that decision because your nature, your environment and your best judgment made it seem like the best thing to do. And perhaps the future will prove you right and perhaps it'll prove you wrong. But that's not really the point. You just do what you feel you have to do. You can think it over and over again, in the end you'll still do what you'll feel you have to. Thinking things over, is only a process to sooth the mind with what the subconscious wants. Of course that's not to say you should run about like a headless chicken, just don't overdo it with the second guessing and re-evaluating. If we think it over to much, we end up having no decisions left to make.
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Postby Extraman » Sat Oct 09, 2010 7:51 am

Hi,
people don't make decissions because they want to be smart in others eyes, they affraid to make mistakes ( they don't realize that mistakes are process of learning and growing), they want everything to do perfectly But you can't do anything perfectly just analyzing, you must act and make mistakes) and so on...
The higher the level of decission the harder to make that decission. Let's say when you wake up in the morning do you spend hours thinking what
drink you will drink- coffe, tea or juice, or what food to eat. I guess not. If you can't make decission what to eat or to drink you will die.
If you just analyzing bad and good sides you let your opportunities walk away.
Simple tip:
Take empty paper, write down - Bad sides and Good sides. And when you have to decide on something, fill that form. And make decission if good sides are more than bad sides of something you analyze.
Time is very valuable thing. One more thing.
"If you affraid, don't do. If you do, don't affraid" (Cingis Khan )
Good luck
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