Quitting weed after 5 years of daily use

Smoking, drinking, drugs. Whatever the object of addiction, it can ruin your life - get help here.

Postby livingoutloud » Tue Nov 30, 2010 3:57 am

Hi everyone... I've been reading this forum for several months and have gotten a lot of knowledge from you all. So, first off I want to say thank you for your posts.

I've been smoking weed, pretty much daily since I was 22. I'm now 27, and I've been fighting with the idea to quit for the past 2 years. All of my close friends smoke too, as well as my boyfriend who I live with- so it's been a struggle to distance myself from it. Plus, I live in Canada where the mentality seems to be "it's just weed, it's natural".

The way I've hit my "bottom" with weed, is I feel as though I am losing my mind. It's tough to explain how exactly, but I'll try - Firstly, my memory is horrible. I've always been known for remembering random things, now I can hardly remember what I did two days ago. Several months ago I saw a Psychiatrist and I opened up about my substance use. He told me that THC has the same chemical make up as the part of our brain that forgets (so our brains don't fill up with useless knowledge).

So, #1 = memory is horrible. The second thing, is that I feel SO dumb. I've always been of above-average intelligence, so not being able to really use my mind makes my self-esteem quite low. But these two things aren't what drove me to quit. It's not even the fact that I feel so unmotivated. The real driving point for quitting is that I feel anxious nearly all of the time. I've had anxiety since I was a child, but only when I was put into certain situations. Now, my heart races, I start to sweat and breathe heavily and feel SO anxious and uncomfortable for no reason at all... Or so I thought. I've met with another Psychologist recently who says Marijuana use can definitely heighten pre-existing conditions of anxiety, depression and other such feelings. He told me in order to proceed with treatment, I need to STOP smoking it.

So, last night I smoked my last bowl, and I smoked it begrudgingly. My boyfriend has agreed to take a break for a couple of weeks, and he's supportive of me quitting. I know it'll be hard in a couple of weeks when he picks up more, but I have to remember where I'm coming from. These horrible, anxious feelings won't go away unless I get this sh** out of my system. I also look forward to actually feeling alive again. I have felt very out of touch with myself - almost like my actions don't apply to the real world. Very hard to explain, but I'll do my best if anyone asks.

This is probably getting pretty long by now, but I plan on updating this as I go. I've said I would quit before, but I never held myself accountable. This time feels different. I feel like if I light up once more, I will push myself further away from the life I had intended for myself.

Please share your stories too - it's what got me here in the first place.
livingoutloud
New Member
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Tue Aug 10, 2010 5:48 am

Postby jurplesman » Tue Nov 30, 2010 6:06 am

HI livingoutloud,

Overcoming addiction to marijuana, is not merely quitting, but rather treat the underlying biochemical abnormality that caused you to be addicted to drugs. Please Read:

Why Addiction to Marijuana?
jurplesman
Super Member
 
Posts: 14147
Joined: Mon Jun 21, 2004 5:38 am
Location: Sydney, Australia

Postby livingoutloud » Tue Nov 30, 2010 9:27 pm

jurplesman wrote:HI livingoutloud,

Overcoming addiction to marijuana, is not merely quitting, but rather treat the underlying biochemical abnormality that caused you to be addicted to drugs. Please Read:


Hi jurplesman... I've seen your posts on other threads in this forum, so I've been to your site before. It may actually be relevent to me in this case. A few months ago I had my horomone levels tested, and my doctor told me I have PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome). Apparently the underlying cause of PCOS is Insulin Reistance. My doctor put me on the birth control pill as treatment, she didn't mention anything regarding a change to my diet.

Up until recently (the past 8 months or so) my diet consisted heavily of packaged, processed foods. Now, I eat a lot more whole foods, but I don't have a strict diet. I crave sweets- I used to eat a lot of cakes, cookies and ice cream. Now I eat more fruit, yogurt, nuts, dark chocolate etc to get my "fix". But, without knowledge of insulin resistance I may be harming myself even with these slightly healthier choices.

Regardless of that though, I still have issues with weed and other compulsive habits. I used to not know, or not care what weed was doing to me. Now I'm to a point where if I don't quit and start making better choices, I am going to drive myself crazy. Weed was the first thing to go, secondly I will visit with a Naturopath doctor and follow up with my Family Doctor and dicuss insulin resitance further.

Any other advice you have would be appreciated!
livingoutloud
New Member
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Tue Aug 10, 2010 5:48 am

Postby jurplesman » Wed Dec 01, 2010 3:33 am

I suggest you go to our web site and look up Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome and articles on drug addiction.
jurplesman
Super Member
 
Posts: 14147
Joined: Mon Jun 21, 2004 5:38 am
Location: Sydney, Australia

Postby resistant » Thu Dec 02, 2010 3:01 pm

hello.


ive also ben smoking heavily since about 02.. ismoked for three years leading up to 02, but during those days, the early days, it was totally different. it was freash and new and of course i was only doing it one or two nights a week so it was just like a fun thing.

HOWEVER once i graduated high school in 02, things changed. I decided to 'take a break' and put off college (never went back). Instead of school I picked up a job delivering pizzas and started just hanging out with friends and getting high every night.

most of those friends are gone, not really anything to do with weed, they just werent good friends and theyre gone. but mj has been a great friend.

sooo 02 -05 i was a heavy smoker but had it under control. i hardly ever smoked chronic, and my tolerance wasnt an issue. i was just smoking reg or mids and it worked. at one time i was only smoking at night, and i was getting super blazed.

but eventually it spilled over into my days, evenings, and mornings. around 06 i developed a nasty xanax addiction(basically just bc my weed dude wwas selling them), which almost ended in disaster but fortunately did not. so i was able to kick that habit somehow, but it was a really tough withdrawl/

also at the time though i was smoking heavily, and drinking all the time, and smoking cigs. so it wasnt like i was just left without any relief.

anyway about mid o7 i kicked the benzos for good, and the alcohol. i decided i really didnt like how it made me feel, i dont like being drunk. so now i never drink. havent drank in two years at least.

while that was a plus, it also helped cement my love for pot. in early 08 i got a vapor bros vape and started vaping my mids. i think this is when i really started abusing...not that i wasnt abusing before..

but this vaporizer, it just sits on your desk and it sso easy to just smoke and smoke. and even after youve smoked your herb you can resmoke to squeeze every drop of thc out.. so it became a problem.

i started to feel sick all the time after vaping for a year. especially in the morning.. kind of a cyclical vomiting syndrome. without seeing a doctor i attributed the vomiting to 'cannabinoid hypermesis' and decided to trash the vape.

and it worked... i went back to bowls and started to feel sick less often and eventually not at all.

THEN my connection moved away. So this led to that and I ended up getting chronic connections, which ive never really had or cared to have. chronic was always just an 'every so often' thing, split an eighth with someone and smoke on it for awhile and thats it til next weekend or whatver.

but NOW i just have chronic connects. and i actually do know one dude who still does the mids, but the problem is i cant even get the least bit high from mids anymore.

i can hardly even get high from smoking 5 or 6 hits of dank as sh** chronic. it hardly even tastes dank anymore.

anywway. basiaclly all this year ive been smoking chronic everyday. at first i was able to make a gram last at least one day, maybe a day and a half or two.. but now im smoking a gram up in an hour, and im still not satsfied.

i'll just start eating, and then i'll need to smoke again, but im out of bud, so it turns into like a frenzy to go get another gram. if i buy the eighth i'll just smoke it all up...

anyway theres alot more. i just wanted to get my first post in.

ive decided to quit for at least a week or two. smoked my last bowl around 15 hours ago. just woke up from 15 hour sleep even though i wasnt that tired, and now im trying to assess my situation sans herb. its going to be tough.
resistant
New Member
 
Posts: 1
Joined: Thu Dec 02, 2010 2:39 pm

Postby jurplesman » Fri Dec 03, 2010 3:28 am

HI resistant,

Tis is a common experience many addicts. The only way of dealing with this is by nutritional means, but it may take some time. Please read:

Why Addiction to Marijuana?
jurplesman
Super Member
 
Posts: 14147
Joined: Mon Jun 21, 2004 5:38 am
Location: Sydney, Australia

Postby livingoutloudx » Thu Dec 30, 2010 7:38 pm

Hi resistant. Thanks for sharing your story. How has the quitting been going?

This month has been up and down. I've had to re-quit about 4 times. I've found my boyfriend to be not very supportive of my quitting, and I think he thinks I'm making a big deal out of this for nothing. I have gone from smoking daily (I would smoke 2-3 bowls per evening) to about once per week. I intended to QUIT, not cut back.

The things that drew me back into smoking was: the first week after I quit, I pulled my back out. I was in a lot of pain, so my boyfriend went out and got me some over-the-counter muscle relaxants (Robaxacil or something of that nature). He then said "I don't want to peer pressure you, but I know something that might help the pain...." So I ended up smoking a bowl to help with the pain. I can't remember if it helped or not. That's just the thing, weed makes it so hard for me to remember what happened when, or to feel connected to my feelings and emotions.

So, after that I said "Ok, quit time" again. I may have gone 2 weeks of quitting at this point, but when Christmas rolled around, all of my friends were over, and they were smoking weed, hash, oil... the works. They said "come on, it's christmas, it's not like you do this every day." I gave in. I smoked twice, once on christmas eve, and again on christmas day. On Christmas day, I ended up feeling extremely anxious and I just didn't feel good.

That was the last time I smoked. I fear that on New Years eve, these friends will say "oh come on, it's new years" but after the past month, I can see more clearly that weed is not my friend, and I don't need to succumb to my friends pressuring me. They might not think it's a big deal to smoke it, and I am not pressuring them to quit, or making them feel bad for doing whatever it is they choose. But I really hope in the future they won't try to pressure me, just to make justifications for their own actions.

About a month ago I started seeing a psychiatrist who has asked me to quit weed to proceed with therapy. I feel guilty for this month of off and on, because I should have just outright QUIT. I'm afraid to admit to the therapist about these troubles, because I don't want him to dismiss me from therapy. I'm ready to quit, and I won't allow any more pressures. Yes, it's the holidays, but that's a poor excuse to get shitfaced/eat a lot/whatever the case may be.

So far I have felt no positive effects of quitting, my brain still feels a bit scrambled and foggy. I know that I will need several months to a year to feel good again. These setbacks have shown me even more how determined I am to get this out of my life. It's hard when the people around me still do it, but they're taking incentive from me quitting. They've said "well, I don't want to smoke it alone, I feel lame." I hope everyone around me will make positive choices for themselves.

So, today it's been 5 days since I've smoked. January 25th will be 1 month, and I am looking forward to that day. I have to stay strong. Please update me on your quitting processes and share your stories. Those stories are what helped me along in the first place.
livingoutloudx
New Member
 
Posts: 2
Joined: Thu Dec 30, 2010 7:19 pm

Postby livingoutloudx » Thu Dec 30, 2010 7:41 pm

jurplesman wrote:HI resistant,

Tis is a common experience many addicts. The only way of dealing with this is by nutritional means, but it may take some time.



Hey Jurplesman... I went for insulin resistance testing and it came back normal. But, all they did was a blood test, and I was expecting a sugary drink and incremental testing. Did I ask for the wrong thing?
livingoutloudx
New Member
 
Posts: 2
Joined: Thu Dec 30, 2010 7:19 pm

Postby jurplesman » Fri Dec 31, 2010 1:25 am

livingoutloudx wrote:
jurplesman wrote:HI resistant,

Tis is a common experience many addicts. The only way of dealing with this is by nutritional means, but it may take some time.


Hey Jurplesman... I went for insulin resistance testing and it came back normal. But, all they did was a blood test, and I was expecting a sugary drink and incremental testing. Did I ask for the wrong thing?


Yes you did not get a test for hypoglycemia as distinct from diabetes. Most conventional doctors do not know how to test for hypoglycemia. It is explained at:

How to get tested for Hypoglycemia
jurplesman
Super Member
 
Posts: 14147
Joined: Mon Jun 21, 2004 5:38 am
Location: Sydney, Australia

Postby EAllagash » Wed Jan 12, 2011 8:49 pm

Not sure if this thread is still alive but I would also like to share as this is one of the more difficult things for me to overcome. I am on my 11th day of recovery and I have been smoking weed every night (full time job, on weekends I'm fully baked.) for nearly 6 years. I would like to start off by saying I love weed, if I had an ounce of self control (or had no determination for life) I'd see no reason to stop. But that's just the problem; I'm an addict for being an addict. I've tried other drugs before (none of the hardcore stuff like heroin/meth/crack as they scared the life out of me) but nothing gives me the relaxed feeling that weed gave me. I have completely lost 6 years of my life and my fiancé because of it. I don't recall any of it. I used to be ambitious and now I need motivation just to get out of bed. I only have one meal a day because I had no appetite without weed. If I ate without weed I'd be full in two bites. I decided to stop because I no longer feel good when I'm high. I no longer feel relaxed, in fact I feel even worse when I am high. I've never been medically diagnosed with depression but I feel SO depressed and I am too embarrassed to tell anybody. I have alienated myself from my friends and family. And my New Years resolution was to stop smoking and to get my life back. So far I have not relapsed, in the 6 years of smoking I didn't go two nights without it(so 11 days is a huge step for me). It is really hard adjusting to reality because my emotions are all messed up. I have trouble interacting with people. I used to be outgoing and easy to talk to but now I'm just the weird guy in the corner.

It was total torture in the beginning, at around 7pm I feel nervous, nauseous and empty. As each day passes I mark a tally (surprisingly it really helps) and I feel better. I still get this anxious feeling of having something to do or else I'd feel extremely sad. But I repeat to myself to take it one day at a time. I set tiny goals and I do them which also helps my recovery, the feeling of accomplishment which has been missing in my life. After 6 years this is all I have to show for it, I have nothing more to say as I am your typical pot head. Losing my train of thought mid-way. I do honestly feel better posting this as i stated above i have lost my friends nor would i want them to know.
:oops:
EAllagash
New Member
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Wed Jan 12, 2011 7:51 pm

Postby EAllagash » Wed Jan 12, 2011 8:56 pm

Sorry for the double post, this is for livingoutloudx. Hang in there, I found one way that was helpful to me. When i get cravings I would think of all the things I'm missing out on (for me, it was life). As i said in my other post I felt even worse when I was high. so I just remind myself of that when i get cravings.


I HAVE CONSTANT BATTLES IN MY HEAD AND SO FAR MY WILL HAS WON!!!
EAllagash
New Member
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Wed Jan 12, 2011 7:51 pm

Postby G0ldenArms » Wed Jan 12, 2011 9:01 pm

hey EA, no thread is ever dead :D we are all trying to kick the mary jane habit one way or another, and EVERYONE is different. Many people here have also been baked 24/7 for numerous years, some even up to 15+ years!

just know that it is not going to be easy, and it will require some time, EVERYBODY is diffrent and some people really cannot quit things cold turkey... tbhat doesnt mean you can't do it, but sometimes you gotta start with baby steps

in my opinion the first step to quitting is realizing its a problem (which you have) and then cutting down uses... once you cut down uses (even this is pretty frickin hard) its much easier to quit.

It is sad to hear you lost your fiance to weed, but hey, that was the past, and you cannot change it... dont let that bring you down, form a new you!

EDIT: download some tom petty if thats your cup of tea, hes got some mellow tunes about feelings, even songs talking about the last dance with mary jane!
G0ldenArms
Junior Member
 
Posts: 34
Joined: Mon Apr 27, 2009 11:20 pm

Postby EAllagash » Wed Jan 12, 2011 9:20 pm

Thanks for the quick reply Goldenarms. Any words of encouragement is helpful as i need as much as i can. I don't normally reach out and qutting cold turkey or doing anything on a whim has been my personality and i understand not everybody is the same. Even so it's quite tough! thanks again! Yes, tom petty is already on my pandora playlist ;D
EAllagash
New Member
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Wed Jan 12, 2011 7:51 pm

Postby EAllagash » Tue Mar 29, 2011 2:07 pm

So, I am back to update on my current status. I have been sober for 72 days (with no relapse) and noticed a significant improvement in my speech. It was NOT easy, the first week was hell. But i was able to pull through by reading some of the stories on this forum. "If i can do it anyone can". I want to admit I have the weakest will of anybody i know and am easily influenced (subconsciously). So believe me when i tell you! You can and will quit weed but you have to "want to". That was my first step, I wanted to! I am getting active and eating healthy, the last microwave meal i had was the last time i smoked weed. Not everything has been peachy i still battle mood swings and depression because of my dependency on weed. The urges are still there but they are easily ignored. Still zoning out but not as often as I did when i smoked regularly. I have extremely vivid dreams/nightmares and i remember them. But, I noticed I have more energy when i wake up. I no longer hit the snooze button. I am getting used to all the things i missed with people and the world around me while i was high. I am slowly putting myself back out there. Still a little awkward in public but its all progress. Weed has disabled my mind and made the world seem scary so i would depend on it. I no longer believe in it, I have taken my life back and I am in control.

That is it for now, I want to wish those who truly want to quit "goodluck" and know that things will be ok after you stop. I smoked as a means of escape, my problems did seem far away but it was still there. Now that i am sober, I have the courage to confront them.
EAllagash
New Member
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Wed Jan 12, 2011 7:51 pm




Return to Addictions