Thank you for your intrest in my query. Where do i even start to tell you? Firstly; Self helq books: I must have every title. I read them, get excited about the info they give, change a little but just go back to the way I was again. I journaled for 5 years, when I started to look back on what I'd written 1 year before it was exactly how I was today, 2 years before just the same, etc. The same qoblems, nothing had changed only I had got older. I could write a book on self helq, I can advise others but I can't seem to change. 101 exercise regeimes started but I quit them all. I'm in a job/career that's I've allways wanted to leave but never have. I'd have oortunities to go into other careers but I've not. I was on the brink of changing my life but I just got so scared and scurried back to the life that is making me lifeless. Afraid I'd miss my friends, the way of life that is familar to me. This safety net I have I guess? I must be afraid of change. Why? I wish I knew and if I did maybe I could resolve this terrible qroblem that is just frustrating me so so much. ;-(
You're not the only one who has practically their own library of self-help books!
There is something you want more than change, what is it?
The desire to feel "right", even if it is all wrong?
(Kindof like what Candid mentioned about self-sabotage.)
Would you consider yourself somewhat perfectionist, in what you expect of yourself?
Change often involves some stumbling while you learn the new process.
I wonder if you're afraid of failing, so you'd rather succeed, even if it's miserable.