I want to kill someone.

Postby Nyx9000 » Fri Feb 13, 2015 1:44 am

I want to kill someone, anyone. I don't know when the urge started, its just always been there. I look at someone and I see different ways I could kill them. I'm making this post because I the urges are getting more intense. I have dreams about killing people and I enjoy them. I don't think that is normal. I have wanted to torture someone and watch them bleed out since I was five. I don't know what I should do, do I need help or is this normal?
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#1

Postby Naithiz » Fri Feb 13, 2015 1:52 am

Hello there. I know how you feel. I know so many ways to kill someone. and i watch vids where someone trys to kill another on the news and it pisses me off. how can someone be so bad at killing someone.
But with that said I don't suggest you go out and kill someone. I do suggest going to a physiologist or the hospital to talk to them. I did so and It has helped me.
Remember if you kill someone and get caught then its over. good by computer good by nice bed. so dont do it. and i know how hard that can be to not want it. again don't do it!!!!!
again i sujest read this and go to the hospital tonight. get the help started. This is no joke, go. take your laptop or ipad or what ever and go. a bad day with a bad situation can end your life as it is.
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#2

Postby Leo Volont » Fri Feb 13, 2015 9:02 am

Nyx9000 wrote:I want to kill someone, anyone. I don't know when the urge started, its just always been there. I look at someone and I see different ways I could kill them. I'm making this post because I the urges are getting more intense. I have dreams about killing people and I enjoy them. I don't think that is normal. I have wanted to torture someone and watch them bleed out since I was five. I don't know what I should do, do I need help or is this normal?


Dear Nyx,

There are a few facts that would be important in evaluating your situation. First, how old are you? I would guess that you fall short of being middle aged, but if we all knew exactly how old you are, then it would help us to place your situation better in its mental development context. Next, and we can try to be discreet as possible with this, but have you ever yet killed anything, that is, gone hunting or tossed rocks at a rabbit or squirrel and knocked it dead? This may be important because maybe you can ‘think’ of killing, but when it comes to actually hurting anything, then you feel disgusted by it and that brings an end to it.

This reminds me of a story – Back several centuries ago there was a great English Scholar, Adventurer and Explorer, Richard Francis Burton. He was the foremost linguist of his day and had passed the British Civil Service Test for over 39 languages, and this before his 30th birthday. He was the first European to visit Mecca – he snuck in and was able to mix with the crowds without anybody spotting him as an English Intruder. He led an expedition which discovered the source of the Nile River. And he wrote the Translation for “A Thousand and One Arabian Nights” which is still in circulation, I believe. Anyway, he was one heck of a guy – the foremost Swashbuckler and Tough Guy of his Age. Well, he thought he wanted to build up his credentials a bit more and become a great hunter just like he seemed to be a great ‘everything else’. So, he started by shooting a monkey out of a tree, and the experience horrified him. The thing screamed and writhed and died, and he couldn’t have been more remorseful about it. But he wasn’t squeamish otherwise. During his Expedition to Discover the Source of the Nile, his camp was raided by tribal bandits, and he drove them off with pistol and sword. He caught a spear in the face and pulled it out and kept on fighting (lovely scar for the rest of his life, and it knocked out some molar teeth too). His Co-Explorer, Edward Speaks, had emptied his pistols and had backed up a bit to reload, and Burton barked at him “Face them! Turn your back and we’re lost!” Well, it was simply good battle advice from a more experienced soldier, but Speaks took it as an attribution of cowardice under fire, or something like that, and never fully forgave Burton for having said it.

Well, Burton really has nothing to do with your problem accept that he thought he wanted to kill, for sport, but when it came to actually doing it, he couldn’t stomach the idea of it any longer. I myself, as a boy, would toss stones at rabbits and squirrels, but stopped the nasty practice the first time I actually hit one. Thank God that I don’t believe I killed it, as it seemed well enough when it hopped away.

Anyway, let us know a bit more about your situation and circumstances and maybe we can come up with some good advice for you.
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#3

Postby Naithiz » Fri Feb 13, 2015 9:08 am

thats an interesting story thanks for sharing it. and it is a good point.
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#4

Postby Leo Volont » Fri Feb 13, 2015 10:00 am

Naithiz wrote:thats an interesting story thanks for sharing it. and it is a good point.


Why, thank you very much.

but I rather thought your advice was much more to the point. You seem to have treated the issue with the importance that it seems to deserve, and so it allowed me to be more casual, discursive and friendly in my approach.

Well, its good, -- between us all we can try everything.
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#5

Postby Naithiz » Fri Feb 13, 2015 10:19 am

super duo fighting insanity since yesterday ^.^ but yea i know what he is going throu and understand that it can go bad fast. look forward to seeing you around. Im new here but love it.
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#6

Postby Nyx9000 » Sat Feb 14, 2015 12:04 am

Dear Nyx,

There are a few facts that would be important in evaluating your situation. First, how old are you? I would guess that you fall short of being middle aged, but if we all knew exactly how old you are, then it would help us to place your situation better in its mental development context. Next, and we can try to be discreet as possible with this, but have you ever yet killed anything, that is, gone hunting or tossed rocks at a rabbit or squirrel and knocked it dead? This may be important because maybe you can ‘think’ of killing, but when it comes to actually hurting anything, then you feel disgusted by it and that brings an end to it.


I am in my twenties and I am a female. I have only killed animals, a dog and pig along with two cats. I beat the cats to death and cut the pig open and the dog I ran over with my car. I was 10 when I killed the pig, and at 15 I beat the cats. The dog I killed about a year ago. I enjoyed cutting the pig the most, while the cats and the dog where not a satisfying.
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#7

Postby Naithiz » Sat Feb 14, 2015 12:16 am

yep go talk to a doc. it will be fine. i did it im not locked up.
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#8

Postby Leo Volont » Sat Feb 14, 2015 4:10 am

Nyx9000 wrote:I am in my twenties and I am a female. I have only killed animals, a dog and pig along with two cats. I beat the cats to death and cut the pig open and the dog I ran over with my car. I was 10 when I killed the pig, and at 15 I beat the cats. The dog I killed about a year ago. I enjoyed cutting the pig the most, while the cats and the dog where not a satisfying.


Dear Nyx,

Of course Mr. Naithiz is very correct in suggesting you seek appropriate medical advice. You are young enough where it is reasonable to suppose that you might be inclined to escalate, and you have actually killed things and so it is not just something that you are imagining that you might like if you ever tried it. But you have tried it and you really do like killing things.

There is not much real advice I can give on such a thing, but I was wondering to myself that it seems kind of a waste that a person who would seem to be, well, a natural born killer can’t find a Government sanctioned job doing what she loves to do. We know that even the Liberal Western Governments traffic in murder once in a while. Not all killing is done by those Drone Machines. I guess that the CIA still does some hands-on work. And I don’t think they would use their Agents for such work… they need to deny so much. They would farm it out to their ‘assets’, wouldn’t they? Well, it sounds like you would make a good ‘asset’.

Do you have career plans. Are you already set on anything? Many of the English Speaking Western Nations – America, Canada, the UK and Australia… I’m guessing you are from some place like that. Well, they are opening their Military Ranks to women, but the Combat Specialties would be the ones you would want, especially just plain old Infantry Rifleman. From there you could get certified as a Sniper, and that is some real Sanctioned Murder. But, I think that most of the Militaries still restrict the areas where they allow full female participation.

You could take a long shot and simply write to whatever your Country has that is like the American CIA or Department of Homeland Defense, and explain to them that you would could make a wonderful asset and that they should pick you up and train you and use you for something truly useful and patriotic before you end up getting yourself into trouble ‘going it alone’.

Of course there are people who free-lance as killers, and there I imagine women are in huge demand, because I would think that body guards would tend to let their guard down when it comes to ‘girls’. But the problem there is that you can’t advertise. I don’t know how such career people can start out. But once they are known about by elements of the Underworld, well, what I guess happens is a carrier shows up on their front porch and asks them to sign for a package. Inside are instructions and a photo and a good size chunk of money, with the promise of more being sent when the job gets done. Oh, I guess they can communicate using the Personal Ads in the Newspaper, but nowadays I suppose they can simply go online somewhere and post a certain phrase for ‘yes’ and a certain phrase for ‘no’, and a certain phrase for “I’ll need twice as much money as you offered”. But, although I’ve watched all the movies, just like everybody else, I can’t imagine how a person can start off on such a career. You can’t just bring it up in a bar that you are available for that kind of work, well because the City Police and the F.B.I. have agents and assets all over the place pretending to want this done or that done, or pretending to be all mobbed up, and they are like spiders waiting for Wannabee hitmen and women to fall into their clutches. Oh, and there is the very important point to be made that probably all of these ideas free flowing from my very active imagination would result somewhere along the line in some illegal activity… illegal even for the Governments that do it. And so you would want to avoid making plans in any of those directions.

So anyway, I suspect that this has been all very useless. But I didn’t want to just dismiss you. I thought that if I thought long enough, I could think of something. But maybe there just is no way to find a Silver Lining around this very Dark Cloud of yours.

Oh, before I go… I just thought of something. Slaughter houses need people. Usually they have to rotate personnel in and out of the killing jobs, because, well, ordinary people get freaked out by it after a while. Also, have you tried getting work in Kennels, or with the Humane Society. They call it the Humane Society, but there are always too many stray animals to find homes for, and so many animals have to be ‘put to sleep’. And there too, the personnel are rotated because the people tend to get freaked out if they have to constantly kill kill kill for more than a few days in a row. But you could explain that you don’t mind, and after they look at you funny, they might realize that since you like it and everyone else hates it, well, “Lady you got a job”. Killing animals on such a regular basis might help you keep the lid on so you don’t kill anything that might get you into some really serious trouble… Like Mr. Naithiz was saying.
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#9

Postby Nyx9000 » Sat Feb 14, 2015 4:35 am

Thank you for taking the time to try and help me and provide support to me. My 'lust' for the action of killing is under raps. I work at a butcher. I, understandable, get odd looks from people when they see a women stabbing an animal, but it's what keeps me from doing something I will regret. Although the desire still lingers. I will see if I can contact someone who will not be so inclined to send me off. I will hopefully run into some luck and find someone willing to help me. Thank you again for giving me another opinion on what I should do in this situation.
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#10

Postby JuliusFawcett » Sat Feb 14, 2015 1:29 pm

Good mental health is doing no harm to yourself or anyone else.

By looking at how you can more effectively improve how you look after yourself you will reduce the risk of prison/hospital

Our mental health and our physical health are intimately related. With that in mind, can you answer a few questions.
Are you eating the right amount of a healthy diet? (no junk)
Are you drinking the right amount of healthy drinks? (no alcohol, caffeine or fizzy)
Are you taking the right amount of healthy exercise?
Are you getting a good balance between work, rest and play?
Are you grateful to the people who make your life more comfortable?
Are you able to forgive easily?
Are you able to trust your intuition?
Are you looking after your personal appearance and living environment?
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#11

Postby Leo Volont » Sun Feb 15, 2015 2:13 am

Nyx9000 wrote:Thank you for taking the time to try and help me and provide support to me. My 'lust' for the action of killing is under raps. I work at a butcher. I, understandable, get odd looks from people when they see a women stabbing an animal, but it's what keeps me from doing something I will regret. Although the desire still lingers. I will see if I can contact someone who will not be so inclined to send me off. I will hopefully run into some luck and find someone willing to help me. Thank you again for giving me another opinion on what I should do in this situation.


Dear Nyx,

Well, thank God, that you found a way to ‘get it under raps’. It turns out you have been sensible about your life. Good going!

Oh, I wonder now that I hadn’t thought of that, that is, getting into the Meat Business, except that one of the jobs I had while working through college was in a butcher shop. I mostly wrapped hamburger and went out on pickups and deliveries. We didn’t do ‘fresh’ meat. That was the first pickup in the morning, going to a larger shop that actually did kill the animals. Slaughter houses are more about Meat Canning and Processing and there are not many of them, but for the local Meat Retail Markets, yes, I had forgotten all about those.

Anyway, you got me to thinking about how the World needs all kinds of people. A few years back I learned that the optimum Social Grouping of people is from about 100 to 150 people. That is the number of people who can all be on a first name basis and everybody seems to fit in, and the group is unified and coherent, and seems to act as One Unit when threatened from the outside. When you look at Anthropological Studies, it is found that many of the Tribal Camps in the great forests and jungles, and many of the Pastoral Nomadic Tribe groups formed up at that approximate size – 100 to 150 members, and if they got bigger than that, well, they would tend to sub-divide and split up into two new groups. Anyway, at the same time I learned that, I was wondering about the distribution of talents and qualities in different people – out of every hundred, or hundred and fifty people, it seems that you’ll have a great many with the ordinary talents and capacities for doing the ordinary stuff, but then you have the instances where not everybody can do some things, and some people seem to need to be born to certain skills, for example, the Shamans and the Healers and the Witchdoctors, and the people who can go into trance and tell the future or see telepathically where the herd went last night. Even the Funny People. The few Wise Ones (not everybody is Wise or seems to need to be). The few super skilled warriors. The few really good singers. The few really good dancers. That one or two people out of a hundred that really know how to tell a joke or a story. Well, you get my drift. Out of every Hundred People or so, Humanity gets all the different kinds of people it needs to make a Sufficient Group – a Group in which you can count on at least somebody being there to do whatever is needed to be done… along with a lot of the ordinary people for all of the ordinary things that come up. But today the Great Number of Ordinary people forget that all of those other ‘rare’ and ‘different’ people are needed too. They can do what other people can’t do, or won’t do. Such is your case. And by filling in these Necessary though infrequent needs, they make life for the rest of us Better, or in some cases, even Possible.

Good luck to you.
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#12

Postby McCain » Sun Feb 15, 2015 4:36 am

Nyx9000 wrote:I want to kill someone, anyone. I don't know when the urge started, its just always been there. I look at someone and I see different ways I could kill them. I'm making this post because I the urges are getting more intense. I have dreams about killing people and I enjoy them. I don't think that is normal. I have wanted to torture someone and watch them bleed out since I was five. I don't know what I should do, do I need help or is this normal?



This might help .

http://www.utexas.edu/features/2005/murder/

Regards McCain
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#13

Postby Leo Volont » Sun Feb 15, 2015 10:54 am

McCain wrote:This might help .

http://www.utexas.edu/features/2005/murder/

Regards McCain


Hi McCain,

I read that article from Texas University, and while interesting in and of itself, the paper seemed to have missed a very essential point, or maybe not. Here, I’ll let you decide – the author assigns almost every instance of murder to some actual material motive, or motive of honor, or motive of status. Reading that article we would get a sense that people ‘always’ have some kind of a motive for murder. Of course, if that is the way the Data Pool goes, well, who can argue with it? However, as is so often the case with Bureaucracies, the data for these studies might have consisted in a lot of ‘phantom’ data – Phantom Data is where people must fill out every block of a Form or Questionnaire, and when they get to a block that really doesn’t apply, instead of crossing out the block or entering N/A (not applicable), they write something in and it might as well just be gibberish for all the use it could be to any serious study. Now, Motive is so critically important in Law Enforcement circles (to build a case the police must show Means, Opportunity, and Motive) that there is probably extreme pressure to never leave that block blank or to ‘N/A’ it. So we are working with a Data Pool that always indicates a Motive. But really? I suspect a great deal of phantom data.

But now let’s use our educated imaginations. What if the only ‘Motive’ for some Murders is simply the quasi-sexual urge to murder. I had heard on TV and the Movies that the most difficult murder cases to solve are those that cannot be traced to any material motive – if the murderer only wants to kill for the sheer sake of killing – for the ‘pleasure’ to be found in the act itself, and establishes no specific type of victim or particular type of ‘hunting ground’, then it’s very likely the killer can keep killing until the police someday get lucky enough to make a routine traffic stop and find the killer with a car full of dead bodies and bloody knives (which has happened).

Also, this Idea of Motiveless murder, well, it kind of fits in well next to the absolute Passion a great many people have for Hunting, which is, when you think about it, the Motiveless murder of Animals. Certainly we can expect some percentage of Avid Hunters, as small as it may be, to graduate themselves up to the motiveless murder of fellow human beings, as offering more ‘sport’ or a greater intensity of the pleasure that they must be getting from killing animals.

Also, we can expect somebody might ask, well, if there are Motiveless Murders, then where are the bodies. Well, that is easy to answer. The Bodies are those of Missing Persons. For every reported Murder, there must be dozens of Missing Persons. I had visited the United States and greatly enjoyed the Western States where the people have so much spunk and character. But it was alarming how often I heard that people must learn to behave themselves or it is simply too easy to kill them and to throw their bodies down abandoned mine shafts that are thousands of feet deep. Or abandoned wells. And when these easy means of disposal are not available, well, there is always the old fall back of simply digging a grave. Or dismembering the body and let the coyotes or raccoons finish the job for you. So you see, there are probably hundreds of thousands of murders subsumed within the Missing Person’s Category. And this is probably were we would find the largest number of Motiveless Murders.

Anyway, as you can see, I think the paper is flawed, and probably because the author was using a data pool corrupted by interested concerns and plugged full of phantom data entries. While Law Enforcement tracks Conviction Rates and hands out rewards for High Conviction Rates and demerits for Low Conviction Rates, then the General Public can be sure of only one thing, that the Data that is being submitted for Public Evaluation is skewed in favor of providing a Higher Conviction Rate than the real truth would probably allow for. If you Punish the Truth, then you will banish it. And we already all know about the respect that the Legal Profession has for the Truth.

Anyway, it was nice speaking with you again, McCain.
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#14

Postby vdystonia » Sun Feb 15, 2015 7:16 pm

If this is not trolling, then you must visit doctor immediately in order not to break your life and other people...
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