Honey, first thing to understand to help fix the problem is to spend some quality time with yourself. You first need to understand the source of your behavior if you are looking to change it. Seeing a school counsellor or registered therapist can help you sort through your behavior, your triggers and help you figure out which approaches or adjustments will work for you.
we are all complex individuals and understanding the reasons behind why we behave the way we do, whether it be constructive or self-destructive is healthy because although it is self evaluation, which can be hard for some, you will come out with a better understanding of your own self and thus have a more comfortable sense of awareness and control in your life.
One approach can be categorized as self induced support. Sometimes we act in ways that seem right or most mentally rewarding in the moment because there's something tell us to do so. For example, many many people in our society struggle with eating disorders simply because we have become a society that has shed a negative light on eating. Diets. Weight loss. Skinny. These are labels that we spread around like wildfire when WHATS best for our own health is different with each person
Try writing down some thoughts that come to your head in these moments of distress. Be real open and honest with yourself. What is going on in your head? What do you think about food? Try journaling for a week or so to get an idea of where this destructive behavior is coming from, and many times if not 100% of the time it's not actually coming from you! But from other things we hear or see. Perhaps your friends or co workers have talked about dieting, losing weight, or even categorizing food as "good or health" or " bad/fattening/unhealthy" or maybe there was a comment or two made directly or indirectly in your family or group of friends that made you think twice before eating a meal or just uncomfortable with food. Just know that those comments or judgements about food are not a part of your biological or psychological make up. In other words, they are unnecessary destructive thoughts about food. Your body needs food to function properly, you need food/energy to be able to think clearly, to be able to sleep properly and to go about your day. Then write down what your thoughts on food are. What food tastes good to you, what food do you regularly crave, if you dreamt about and fun vacation or a perfect day what would you eat for breakfast or lunch or dinner?
Try noticed the behavior of those around you when it comes to food, are they comfortable with eating or talking about food? Are they constructive when talking about food, or even other things like their own behavior, do they have a stressful situation going on in their life? Do you? Sometimes stressful situations cause us to change how we think about other things in life such as food or exercise because they help us feel in control. Although eating and exercise are stress reducing and healthy, we each know if perhaps we are putting too much focus on one thing in life to avoid another.
Again speaking with a counsellor with help you figure out what these things are if any. After figuring out if it's people around you that trigger this behavior, start caring about you! You are the only one who can do that. Start going to people you trust, even to just grab a meal together or plan to order dinner and watch TV. Start learning and building your comfort zones.
If you have your own room or bathroom try supporting your healthy positive focus on eating by buying food or cooking magazines that interest you! Try new recipes, or invite a friend to try a new cafe or restaurant around you. Making eating fun enjoyable and social, how it's meant to be! Buy your favorite foods and switch up what your eating to fluctuating your taste buds and keep a positive interest in it.
If you find yourself being to self conscious when eating talk to someone else or simply put headphones in when you eat and listen to music.
Binge eating us most commonly linked to feelings of guilt or shame, which should never be the case with something like food that nourishes and fuels your body! Eat regularly every day and do it for YOU! You are worth it you deserve it and most importantly you need it!
I'm not a therapist so any of the advice is from personal experience and research, but I will say that when I struggled with eating in front of people, looking back on that time it really didn't have to do with my lack of interest in eating, but rather my bottled feelings and thoughts about other things going on in my life. What really helped me was opening up to the one or two people I trusted to talk things through with. Knowing that other people care about you and being able to communicate how you are feeling helps you realize that you are not alone, not crazy or abnormal. Other people love and care about you and you must love and care about yourself <3
Best of wishes Sending lots of positive energy your way !!