I think you need to get out of this insecure phase.
Remember, you were born to stand out, not FIT IN. Fitting in will not get you very far. The most successful or amazing people in the world are rebels, outliers.
Try reading books, like this case outlier by malcolm gladwell!
Secondly, you are depressed because you do not love yourself. Self -love is very much understated. Im not self promoting but I will recommend you to read my book 101 uplifting affirmations for radical self-love and 67 golden rules to success.
Thirdly, meditate. Meditation by far is one of my most useful whenever i hit lows in my life. It always somehow manage to calm me down, and keep me in check. No other person can do tha for you BUT YOURSELF. and meditation is the tool.
This is going to be a long process, but i wish you all the best. dont expect instant results. But you will get there slowly, in months or even a year.
All the best.