Inferiority is my normal

Postby maryshelley » Wed Aug 03, 2016 5:06 am

Hi everyone,

I'm not sure where to start on this. My childhood self who grew up hearing relatives say I was not smart? More precisely, dumb and stone-like? My teenage self who, like all other girls, went through an awkward phase that never ended? Or my current 25-year old self, who is stumped at the word confidence, and can only find equilibrium in self-doubt. Worse, self-hate.

The past few years have been very difficult and led to a lot of delay in my engineering career. But then I believe that even without the difficulties, I would still not have done a good job because I'm not good enough. Then I tried working on my writing, as I've believed I'm fairly good at it. But that seems to be going nowhere too. No one really seems to like what I write.
I always seem to be at the bottom of everything. No guy has liked me because of how ugly I am. Is there ever any hope for people like me?
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#1

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Fri Aug 05, 2016 1:02 pm

An engineering career. That is not normal, nor is it inferior.

You need to adjust what you believe is "inferior". What you posted is like saying, "I'm a professional soccer player, but I'm only a backup goalie." Only? You're a professional friggin soccer player! You're an engineer!
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#2

Postby Ralph Atia » Fri Aug 05, 2016 3:30 pm

maryshelley wrote:Hi everyone,

I'm not sure where to start on this. My childhood self who grew up hearing relatives say I was not smart? More precisely, dumb and stone-like? My teenage self who, like all other girls, went through an awkward phase that never ended? Or my current 25-year old self, who is stumped at the word confidence, and can only find equilibrium in self-doubt. Worse, self-hate.

The past few years have been very difficult and led to a lot of delay in my engineering career. But then I believe that even without the difficulties, I would still not have done a good job because I'm not good enough. Then I tried working on my writing, as I've believed I'm fairly good at it. But that seems to be going nowhere too. No one really seems to like what I write.
I always seem to be at the bottom of everything. No guy has liked me because of how ugly I am. Is there ever any hope for people like me?


Hey maryshelley!

I am super happy that you have opened up! you sharing this is a sign that you feel compressed inside of you! and you want some air to breath with! when you smell an unpleasant scent what is the first thing you do, you immediately take action and go somewhere else right? that's what you need to do!

As growing up as children we tend to believe what the older generation say is true because they are older than us and they seem "smart" but in reality is the older generation has "developed" common sense. Do you know one thing that stops you from doing something which then causes a ripple effect of bad things? how you view yourself! because if you didn't listen to your parents (they probably called you this and that because they didn't have hope in life because they are not where they want to be and it has rubbed on them from their grand parents, i.e. dandruff, from head to shoulders then to pets then wind the someone else and it becomes a cycle) you would of said stuff to yourself like "i can do this, i am better than them, how can i make my day better, i am an amazing human beginning". because life is an experience of what you say and it affects your quality of life. if you say good things it inspires and motivates you to do good things to yourself and if you say bad things, you become inspired to say and do bad things to yourself which will effect you in a bad way!

A little advice, show I AM AWESOME! and when looking in the mirror or walking alone say the best things about yourself and make it a habit and give it a few days and your life will change forever!

it all begins on how youview and say to yourself its in the sentence itself and its the word youand this whole paragraph and i took time our of my day to help you!


Follow my social media for more advice:
Youtube: AddictedToEffort
Instagram : Ralph Atia
Twitter: Ralph Atia


Leaving me to say,
Keep Smiling!
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#3

Postby moondaddy1 » Tue Aug 09, 2016 1:34 pm

Along the lines of what Ralph Atia said. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks about you, what matters is what YOU think about you. "Inferiority" is merely a state of mind and you can change a state of mind if you really want to.

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Eleanor Roosevelt.

Start to make the change in small ways. Take out 10 minutes a day to think and feel yourself as being who and what you want to be, even if that just simply means being a bit more confident and self assured. See and feel yourself as being that way and mentally or verbally tell yourself "I'm just as good as anyone else." Not better, not worse, just "as good as"

At first your negative self will try to persuade you that you're wasting your time, that you should just accept that you're less worthy that anyone else. Is there some law of nature that says that you in some mysterious way have to be less worthy than anyone else? Of course there isn't. It's just a state of mind, and you can change it, no matter how unrealistic that may seem right now. Put simply, make a conscious mental effort, privately, to focus more on the positive about you than the negative. And before you think there's nothing positive about you, you'd be wrong. There are positive things about you, no matter what you might think now.
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