Hello there, I always wanted to hear other opinion about stuff I see in myself and seems something is not right. Simply I am trying to understand what is wrong with me. I don't know even from where to start to so I am just going to give some examples:
- A lot of people invites me everywhere but when i go there i don't feel right (movie, club, hangout and other similar stuff), but if I am not going somewhere i feel somehow disappointed with myself, my actions. Especially with people I care (family, girls i like), Just simply if i go somewhere, i don't feel that I am doing right thing, i just don't like the time i spend and if i stay at home it doesn't feel right too cause it seems so that I am just wasting my life so in any way i don't feel any good.
- Simply everything seems boring and not intersting, people i meet, stuff i do (but i would like to learn more but when i learn is just doesn't make me any more happy) like drawing, sports, organize (internet stuff).
- I would like to do a lot of extreme stuff like Skydiving, skiing, driving with motorcycle, parachuting from clifts or something like that. I did some stuff but still, it's feels not right, not much entertaining, that i could feel Alive.
- I traveled some, worked in diffrent countries, i felt happiness for short time but everything just simply wash away in few weeks.
- Most time without things i will mention in below I only stay on Computer cause everything other just wash away too quick, i mean my own interest in any activity (except Computer). And no, I am not addictive to this, but it just the only way to do something at while other stuff just don't keep that interest. Even PC is just getting boring too.
- 0 emotional about any stuff.
Things about myself which I do and I did in those 20 years of my life and if you think I need some kind if Motivation or what but I don't think that is a thing:
- Serving in Volunteer Army 2 years (would like to become Profesional Soldier but didn't passed Heath test like Hearing) and keep serving.
- High achievment in own country and Baltic States (like champion) in Atlhetics, Basketball.
- Learning IT, doing a lot of internet stuff which i earn money, gaming (mostly what i do, but it's just doesn't keep me hooked).
- Very Self-Confident
- Never have been Drunk or drinked any alchohol more then 50ml. Never smoked and didn't tryied.
- Always tryied and trying to achieve best. Not to impress others, to show-off or something, but to give myself best to it.
- Always trying to change to be better cause no one is perfect. Learn from my mistakes.
Just simply can anyone tell me how to overcome this lose of interest in anything, gain Happiness, to do stuff i would like to do and enjoy it, but if i do it alone it just don't feel good and same with others. Just simply stuff i do like and i do doesn't seems so to bring any joy, only very little and short and only disapointment.