no self control why do i do things i know i shouldnt?

Postby mute » Fri Jul 06, 2018 8:09 pm

heres a situation

I buy junk food and eat it
feel bad after it
but I do it day after day and have no control over it

I fully understand how bad it is but I literally have no control when I go and buy the junk food.
I'm well aware that I will feel bad even before I get in the car to drive and get the food
but my brain becomes dull and I just go get it and eat it and then feel like crap and wonder why I couldn't stop myself or for example pick a healthier meal
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Postby tokeless » Fri Jul 06, 2018 8:42 pm

You choose to believe you can't stop this behaviour when you can. You could change at several points, such as driving to a different store where junk food isn't sold. We all make choices but we also choose to make excuses as to why we can't stop. If you were told the next time you'll die or become rich, you would choose the right option to get or avoid the consequence.
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Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Fri Jul 06, 2018 8:46 pm

We all do things we shouldn’t...REPEATEDLY.

Welcome to the struggle of being human. There isn’t a single person that flawlessly executes every choice or decision with perfection. There are trade offs.

If you want to stop eating junk food you do so by deliberate design. Specifically;

-1- create if/then rules that create alternative options. If I crave junk food, then I XYZ. Write down the rules.

-2- Establish positive/negative reinforcement for following the if/then rules. Rewards and punishment work if structured correctly.

-3- Enlist help. This can range from a simple buddy system to paying $$$ for a person that will help hold you accountable.

-4- Prioritize your goals. Whatever your primary focus in life, it is depleting your mental resources. If you put 100% of your energy into work, school, or some other area, that leaves 0% to regulate health. You need to back off other goals to conserve some resources. You need better balance.
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Postby DrPsychFeels » Sun Jul 08, 2018 3:49 pm

What you're experiencing is a compulsive behavior. The cause is latent anxiety, which is painful, so you come up with ways to distract yourself from the pain, hence the compulsive behavior.

Usually, in modern society, the anxiety is caused by loneliness, lack of secure attachments.

On another level, the compulsion may not feel good necessarily but it does feel comfortable. It's what you're used to. A drug addict will gladly sabotage his life to get his fix, and you'll sabotage your life to get an emotional fix.

Start reaching out, learn how to create secure attachments, look at threats in your life and confront them, and the compulsion will work itself out without you having to think about it.
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Postby Ash.craven1066 » Sat Jul 14, 2018 2:11 pm

Humans by nature want instant gratification and that is the reason why so many choose the instant option rather than waiting for what they know is the right choice. Fast food tastes great and we feel so great eating this. Its this feeling we remember and so the behaviour is reinforced. We need to change this habit by replacing this with something else that makes us feel great. Use the money for something else instead and remember the power is in the decision which you have full control over.
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