what's wrong with my family?

Postby katiebell » Sat Feb 22, 2020 3:13 pm

my family argue all the time. I get that all families argue at points but my family will easily shout at each other more than 30 times a day. I'm 15 and sitting my GCSEs in 3 months and this is preventing my ability to revise. I can't deal with t anymore. I try to stay out of it but the negative energy takes a toll on me. I can't tell them how I feel because every time I have in the past they get defensive and push the blame around, no change ever happens. I don't see why it's so difficult for them to show a little empathy or put themselves in mine and my siblings shoes. they have the shortest temper and just snap. they atmosphere in our house is so inconsistent. I get that they are probably stressed about things like money and our well being but they take it out on us and I can't stand being at the house at the moment. Is it my fault? I really don't believe I've done anything wrong yet nothing seems to be good enough for them. I'm the oldest out of my siblings so I won't have to be at home much longer but this is starting to make me feel depressed. I feel like my younger siblings will end up feeling the same way in the future. I'm out of options on what to do. I feel bad for complaining because I get that some families have it a lot worse but this is really pushing me. I just feel trapped and its taking a toll on me. I just feel like it's all my fault. Thank you for taking the time to read this : )
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#1

Postby tokeless » Sat Feb 22, 2020 9:30 pm

Hi,
Firstly, no it's not your fault but that's little consolation really. Have you got any extended family you can speak to about this to get support and perhaps someone who can intervene? Is there one of your family who despite the issues you can speak to about how this is affecting you,? You could speak to social yourself if it gets too bad because of the effect on the younger children... but I'd explore the first suggestions first.
Keep in touch so we can help you.
Best wishes
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#2

Postby Chad Capote » Thu Mar 26, 2020 2:21 am

I know it is easy to dismiss things by saying all families fight but this seems excessive and it is clearly affecting your mental health. While your family might still love you, but sometimes it is not enough. As you said, one needs to show empathy towards one another. Have you tried talking to them nicely when they are calm? By nicely I mean without placing the blame on the other person even though they are at fault. Maybe if you show them empathy, and make them realize that you appreciate what they do, they might change.
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#3

Postby izzy95 » Mon Apr 13, 2020 5:52 pm

tokeless wrote:Hi,
Firstly, no it's not your fault but that's little consolation really. Have you got any extended family you can speak to about this to get support and perhaps someone who can intervene? Is there one of your family who despite the issues you can speak to about how this is affecting you,? You could speak to social yourself if it gets too bad because of the effect on the younger children... but I'd explore the first suggestions first.
Keep in touch so we can help you.
Best wishes


Agree 100%
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#4

Postby chambersecret90 » Tue Apr 28, 2020 11:51 am

izzy95 wrote:
tokeless wrote:Hi,
Firstly, no it's not your fault but that's little consolation really. Have you got any extended family you can speak to about this to get support and perhaps someone who can intervene? Is there one of your family who despite the issues you can speak to about how this is affecting you,? You could speak to social yourself if it gets too bad because of the effect on the younger children... but I'd explore the first suggestions first.
Keep in touch so we can help you.
Best wishes


Agree 100%


Appreciate it!
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