collouege running away from anger instead of facing it

Postby xavoseb292 » Fri Nov 20, 2020 8:24 pm

I have a question about interesting behavior, certain things at work make me angry or unsatisfied and recently i started expressing it with one of colleagues because we started getting closer but noticed as soon as I would start get angry or start talk about certain things that need improvement she would turn off and get angry because i am angry and not want to talk with me anymore.

We stopped talking, I am no longer expressing as much as I used to with her because I feel like I cannot be open and she seems to be strict never-angry emotion? I've never encountered it before and need professional opinion. Anything would be great, thank you.

Please tell me if I am correct about this:

- It's okay to be angry about certain situation where you are unsatisfied and need immediate change it's not good to be angry all the time but sometimes it's necessary evil like stress to get us going and do better.

She has idea of never being angry or stressed and work should be pleasurable which I agree with but it seems that she completely doesn't even wanna face angry emotion and it doesn't seem healthy way to deal with it. Nor does it seem realistic for everything to be perfect and ideal.
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#1

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Sat Nov 21, 2020 2:33 am

xavoseb292 wrote:- It's okay to be angry about certain situation where you are unsatisfied and need immediate change


And when you get angry things at work immediately change so that you are satisfied?
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#2

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Sun Nov 22, 2020 6:55 pm

So the answer is no, things do not change or improve because you get angry.

You get angry for no productive reason. You rationalize or justify it is a "necessary evil" to "get us going and do better" but that is an excuse, it is grade-A bull$#%^ to excuse your anger as having a useful purpose. The reality is that your anger does nothing to solve anything and it just adds to a miserable working environment.

It sounds like your colleague "running" is more about just not wanting to deal with your nonsense.
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