Positive stories!

Postby Luna824 » Thu Apr 15, 2021 2:21 am

Hi All

Like many people here, I’m going through marijuana withdrawals. I’m going on 2 months sober (yay) a little background:

I’ve been smoking since my teens on and off. I’ve never had a problem quitting until this go around. I started smoking consistently about 2 years ago. Before Covid I was smoking a majority of the week but usually in the evening time around 1 bowl a night. Then..Covid/pandemic and I started smoking more often. I even started dabbing at one point. I knew I had a problem but I couldn’t stop. The “mind numbing” feeling when I was high was my outlet from life. I actually looked forward to being high. Not having to think about anything and enjoying food. Fast forward to a few weeks leading up to me quitting cold turkey. I started having anxiety attacks while high. Like I was going to have a heart attack or something. Deep down I knew I was unhealthy and getting worst the more I smoked so maybe that’s what led to the anxiety. Anyways took 2 hits of dab one night (which should be nothing due to my high tolerance) I had a full blown panic attack. I had no control over my mind and body. I was terrified and quit right there and then.

Now for the symptoms:
First 2 weeks were easy. I felt nothing. Then it hit me like a truck. Full blown anxiety. I’ve always had an active mind and over analyze everything but it never negatively affected me till now. I was too scared to do anything. I thought if I went out I’d pass out or have a heart attack in the middle of the store. I didn’t want to go anywhere public. I know it sounds crazy. Some other symptoms: Nausea, stomach issues (no appetite) head aches, brain fog, heart palpitations, SOB, chest pain, feeling doomed, vivid dreams (not nightmares just very vivid) It came in waves. Some days were better than others. For some reason anxiety usually came after eating so I would eat enough to be somewhat full but never too full. I ended up losing weight. I’m going on 2 months now and here are some symptoms: anxiety is manageable. I can go out to stores for a short period of time( maybe 30 mins - 1 hour)/slight fear of public places, locking my jaws/grinding, dizziness which increases my anxiety due to my fear of passing out or that something internally is wrong with me, completely forgetting what it was just about to do, or even what I was just talking about. I know this will all pass. I know this is temporary. I know quitting is only going to benefit my life. I know all of this but would still love to hear your positive stories. When did it get better for you? What did you do to help manage? What did you do when you started having anxiety attacks?

Here are a few things I’ve done/do:
- download I am (amazing reassurance app)
- meditate when anxiety gets bad
- eat small meals
- take hot showers
- nap
- try to distract myself with shows, TV, games
- practice mindfulness. Try to live in the moment rather than thinking about myself passing out in the middle of target

Thank you for reading my story and I hope to connect with anyone going through it or who have gone through it. I strongly believe support is the best way to get over this.
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Postby tokes » Sat Apr 17, 2021 11:16 am

I can relate to being in public or in a normal social setting and suddenly my whole body and mind being washed over by a wave of impeding doom, sudden dread and irrational fear. It can be anywhere from eating a meal with friends to playing a game of pool in a bar. After a while these lessened in intensity to the point where that 'overwhelming sudden anxiety/panic feeling' would only last 10 seconds before it disappeared. Where I am today, 3 years clean, that feeling comes maybe once every 3-6 months and lasts only a few seconds. So all that anxiety and panic you are feeling now IS temporary and WILL lessen over time. Anxiety and panic disorder are rarely, if ever, lifelong conditions.

I like your little list and think all those things are good; I used a lot of them myself. Try end your hot showers with cold water as its really good for refreshing the system.

Some other things I have found helpful in crisis moments are:

Stretching. Try the tricky kitty, tree pose, eagle pose, warrior III and dancers pose. Or google stretches for anxiety and see what you like!
Doing press ups and sit ups.
Going for a long walk.
Green tea, chamomile, peppermint chamomile.
Eating protein in the morning and low/if any carbs. Protein takes a longer time to be broken down in the body leading to a more gradual release of energy of the day instead of sudden carb/sugar spikes which may make you feel a bit jittery and then a bit panicky.

In some of the most extreme cases where I start to feel my heart rate rising and a panic attack incoming, I started to tell myself...'**** it, this is it, this is where I die, i'll just die here'. Once you face up to foundational fear of the panic attack (dying) it starts to have less of a control over you and less intensity. Make peace with the idea of death, not war.

Overall, from being in a state of despair a few years ago i am now 95% symptom free. The only thing that really affects me are heart palpitations which I am sure will disappear in due course too.
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