24 years using, 4 months weed free my story

[DefiedOdds]

I actually just stumbled across this forum today too, it was the first one I visited and the only one! Thanks green Same to you!

[Jonok1]

What a great post, thankyou for sharing it, im at day 124 so im counting it as 4 months, im a 52 year old who has smoked weed for about ten years, i was a cigerette smoker since being 15, i managed to stop that four years ago. I carried on with weed by smoking it neat in a pipe or blunts as i didnt want to get hooked on nicotine!
I realised that weed was spoiling my life and causing mood swings, the worst occasion nearly caused me to get arrested, i wont bore you with the detail but maybe it was the wake up call i needed.
Ive found the last four months a real roller coaster, i probably found the first month the easiest, perhaps because dispite feeling on edge I was highly motivated im not sure? This forum has been an incredible help, dont think i would have got this far without it.
Month two and three i counted the days, did some cycling which does help and focused on the fact that better days would come in time.
Month four im finding very hard, i dont ever want to go back to smoking weed but i am struggling with depression and anxiety. I can relate so much to what you describe in your post, i wake very early and my mind is full of worry about what im doing with my life! Ive got some great opportunities but cant seem to think clearly, blow hot and cold and cant make plans.
Ive thought about going to my doctor but dont want to replace weed with prescription drugs.
Im clinging to the hope that things willl improve soon.
Thanks once again for the post, i was feeling so sh** this morning, reading it made me feel far less alone.
J

[cleanofgreen]

@jonok1

Form your description of what your going through at 4 months, it's pretty similar to me. I had a pretty uneventful first 6 weeks off weed and then bam the anxiety and depression started. Wondering what I had done with my life and what I was going to do in the future . You have to try look for the silver lining in the years spent smoking, as it does bring some good with it. I think had it not been for weed and the hell I went through when giving up and that if everything was just fine and worked out wonderfully that I would have never had the chance to grow and that I probably would have become an arrogant ass-hole. The weed and the quitting helped to humble me, to see the world in a different light, to have empathy for those that I would have said "grow a pair" to before. That vulnerability is something I never experienced before and therefore would never be able to relate to in some one else.
If anxiety and depression came with the quit then they should leave with enough time off the weed. For me it was about 6 to 8 months where things slowly began to get better, everyone is different so your mileage might vary.

Good luck and stay strong.

[cleanofgreen]

Someone pm'ed me to ask this question so I will repost my reply so some others might get some benefit

Question

Im going through PAWS and having a lot of social anxiety. I see you went through it, how did you cope with it during the first few months? It seems to come and go but when it hits again I get really discouraged. Trying to function at work is my main issue.

My Reply

Hi,
It's a bummer about the social anxiety and it did get really bad for my too. I didn't cope well with it to be honest, and it took me by surprise, as it was something that I never experienced before. The only thing that got me through was intense exercise and knowing from reading these forums that it would get better in 3 months , 6 months , 9 months or at some stage during the 3 year recovery window, depending on how much, how long and what strength I smoked.

All I can say is that you have to know that you will get better and the brain will eventually rewire, it just takes a lot of time. Everybody on this forum who quit for an extended length of time recovered in the 3 months to 3 years time frame all depending on your usage and what quality of life you have (good friends, relationships, job etc.) As the Buddhists say, just keep saying to yourself when a bad spell hits "This too shall pass". I know it sounds hokey but it does help a lot.

Once you know that it will get better , its easier to push through the bad spells. Anxiety comes about by focusing on the future and not being in the present moment so if you try to divert your focus off of yourself and onto someone else e.g. by calling a friend or loved one and just trying to make their day better (not talking about how you are feeling miserable).

Here's what I said at 9 months clean, it was around 7 - 7.5 months where the anxiety lifted, I just woke up one morning and it was gone.

Well the 26th has passed again and I've reached 9 months clean of weed and the changes in the last 1.5 months have been massive. The depression and crippling anxiety that plagued me 24/7 from 1.5 to 6 months, and the morning anxiety from 6 - 7.5 months is completely gone , it's like someone removed a plastic bag from my head and I can finally breathe freely again. All I can say is that for any heavy long term smokers struggling in the first few months with doubts about whether they will ever be normal again is to stick with it, it does get better with a lot of time, things turned around for me at 7.5 to 8 months. It was without doubt the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. Quitting weed is a process, it's something that happens gradually over time, by the time you get the feedback, all the hard work is all ready done.

Hope this helps a bit. Just know it will get better and just takes time.
Good luck and stay strong.

[BullFrog]

Thanks, Clean, for your post. Your story and comments have always been helpful. And the fact that you stick around and continue to give feedback is a testament to your good character. I hope you have a great week, bro. Blessings!

[Jonok1]

Just a quick update, just I hope to help, I’ve managed to stick with staying clean, I was struggling at the four months and it continued to be grim until six, but the skies started to clear and the sun started to come out after that! I’m at eight months now and things really getting better. I feel much more in control, of course I have bad days but my strong advice is to stick with it, it gets better believe me. This forum played a big part in helping me avoid ruining the rest of my life, I will always be grateful.

[cleanofgreen]

@bullfrog
Thanks for the kind words and have a great week also.
Stay strong.

@Jonok1
Thanks for coming back to tell us the great news. 8 months That's awesome that it started to turn around 6 months and keeps getting better.
Stay strong.