30 years of weed behind me

Postby Weedbegone » Sat Apr 29, 2017 4:27 pm

Smoked every day for the past 30 years except when I was pregnant. I had a great career and am now retired. Figured it would be great to toke all day in retirement. Not so. I got to the point where that became all I was doing. I was also hiding this fact from my husband who did not deserve that.
We recently moved from California where I had a medical marajuana card to a state which is very far removed from progressive California. I ran out of weed last Friday and my source in Cali dried up. Saturday and Sunday I scraped my one hitter, grinder and anything else I thought might have a trace of pot. Monday morning I had nothing to wake and bake with and my mind went into a panic. I was so desperate I reached out to a virtual stranger to send me some in the mail. Drug trafficking is not wise and I would never survive in prison, plus my husband doesn't deserve that faction brought into our lives, so I decided all these signs pointed to me finally kicking this terrible habit instead. The first few days I really didn't think I was going to make it. I even considered going to the ER the withdrawal was so bad. Couldn't eat or drink. If I did, I threw up...
Today is the first day I got up, drank coffee and cooked and ate eggs and sausage for breakfast. My mind is getting clearer and my natural senses are returning, albeit, slowly. I had to change my clothes in the middle of the night last night because of the sweats. I'm sure that will improve over time. Sleep is sporadic. Bottom line...I've never been happier!
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#1

Postby Weedbegone » Sun Apr 30, 2017 12:38 pm

One week today. That hasn't happened in several years. One day at a time, right? Body temperature has no regulation but at least I can eat. Even had a steak dinner and glass of wine last night. Mood...I get irritated quickly but am trying to temper it. (No pun intended) Looking for positive changes each day. God Bless everyone on their path.
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#2

Postby Weedbegone » Sun Apr 30, 2017 3:27 pm

Anxiety has kicked in this morning. Can't stop sweating even after eating. My mind seems foggy and I feel like I'm going to crawl out of my skin. Still not worth smoking though. I think I would smoke had I not had such terrible withdrawal. The thought of going through that again is not worth the temporary high. Then I wouldn't have a week under my belt either. Baby steps...
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#3

Postby tokeless » Sun Apr 30, 2017 3:55 pm

Hi there. I smoked just like you described before suddenly stopping for some unplanned reason as I hadn't decided to. Got the sweats but little else.. no cravings no desire to. I know the kind of smoker I was so could never do again because it would be pointless. I'm 3 years in but don't count really because to not smoke is my normal so countings a bit like reminiscence to me.. it keeps the thought active but that's only my view.
You've done really well and you can stay stopped by continuing to make the right choices.. the psychological battles are the one's to win from my experience of working in addictions for 16yrs.. the brain can try and get you to consider smoking differently, just so you can smoke again. Wake and bakers are not controlled smokers so I would never try again.. I'm done and glad of it. Stay strong and you'll do it. You could choose to go back to your old ways, but ask what would you get that you haven't already done? Being weed free is so much better imo.
Best wishes
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#4

Postby Gitana » Sun Apr 30, 2017 5:01 pm

Thanks for sharing the ride Weedbegone - indeed the physical side is pretty terrible, yet the psychological battle is the one to win - we can do so much more than what our messed-up brains tell us. Enjoy the ride!
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#5

Postby RiF » Sun Apr 30, 2017 8:57 pm

Great work getting the week behind you. Keep going. The sweats stopped for me around the second week, i am into week 9 now. My gf put me on to niacin (vitamin B3) 100mg to help the anxiety. They worked like magic for me and i just take one when i need them. They do give you an uncomfortable flush for the first few times you take them so dont be alarmed. I also get a massage every sunday to reward myself. It costs roughly half what i spent on weed and is really rewarding haha.

I laughed inside when you talked about scraping every source of weed you could think of. It reminded me of being down on my hands and knees in the carpet with tweezers, sorting through the dead bugs, toenails, pubic hairs and dead skin cells trying to scrape half a cone together. Thats a revolting addict right there, i am grateful no one ever saw me.

Good blessings and keep it up, we are on the winning team.
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#6

Postby Bagobones » Mon May 01, 2017 6:51 am

Weedbegone wrote:Today is the first day I got up, drank coffee and cooked and ate eggs and sausage for breakfast. My mind is getting clearer and my natural senses are returning, albeit, slowly. I had to change my clothes in the middle of the night last night because of the sweats. I'm sure that will improve over time. Sleep is sporadic. Bottom line...I've never been happier!


Never been happier. hehe. Best comment here in a long time. Welcome to the club.

Keep going, and soon enough weeks have turned into months and weed has turned into a stupid distant memory from the past. I am 8 months in and weed is rarely on my mind anymore.
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#7

Postby ScottMoore » Sat Jul 08, 2017 3:07 am

I've got 37 years and counting. I was gonna set a quit date and I found this site today, now I'm scared to death.
"Normal"? I can only remember a handful of days in my life when I wasn't high. I've never known normal I guess.
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#8

Postby RiF » Sat Jul 08, 2017 6:40 am

ScottMoore wrote:I've got 37 years and counting. I was gonna set a quit date and I found this site today, now I'm scared to death.
"Normal"? I can only remember a handful of days in my life when I wasn't high. I've never known normal I guess.

When you're ready to take the plunge, start a thread and keep us posted. The ball is in you're court, but we are all cheering you on. I am clean about 130 days now and life has never been so good and is getting better and better. You just need to start the first day and bunker down. With all the sh** you will go through, lots of silver linings are there to keep you motivatedif you look for them. Good luck
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#9

Postby ScottMoore » Sat Jul 08, 2017 1:58 pm

"When you're ready to take the plunge, start a thread and keep us posted."


Thanks man. That makes me feel better.
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#10

Postby naturegirl » Sun Jul 09, 2017 6:48 pm

I am so happy that I am not the only one out there struggling with this. It is hard. You take it one day at a time. I'm on day 4 right now. I'm super happy that I found this site. I think it is good to reflect and think and feel supported. Life is better when you can live it smoke free. What is hard is the 30 plus year habit that we have created. Anyway, hang in there. I just wrote a short post myself and then saw this post. I appreciate anyone who is walking in the same shoes as me.
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#11

Postby lag » Wed Aug 02, 2017 1:41 pm

HI nature girl
Are you a tobacco smoking vegan?
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#12

Postby Siren1927 » Mon Apr 02, 2018 3:00 pm

Wow!!! So amazing to quit after 30 years!! Congratulations! I'm on Day 5 after about 20 years off/on. Last 4 years I've smoked all day every day and the detox I'm in right now is pretty awful. Changing pajamas twice a night bc of horrible sweats, sick to my stomach, lungs purging all the tar and mucus. Yuck!!!! Stay strong and don't ever go back to that sh**!!!!!
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