by theodor » Thu Jan 18, 2018 3:40 am
Marcster44, try to look at your reaction and key words, "bud", "take your drunk donkey to a rehab", "depressed wino", a very aggressive action, this is clearly a defence mechanism that you used, the question to ask yourself is why, what bothered you so much about my post to react this way, you may uncover the reasons for your depression/anger this way.
I always slept like a baby when smoking weed, minimum 8 hours a day. So, based on my experience, not scientific studies, it promoted quite good sleeping habits.
If you were not depressed 12 years ago, it doesn't mean you cannot get depressed in the meantime. People that don't consume anything get depressed, so, maybe it would be a good idea to go see a therapist that could walk you through your childhood/teenage years, and try to uncover some potential traumas that you may have. You could do that by yourself, but needs a lot of discipline and some study before hand, and in my opinion you lack both currently (just observation, not trying to make you feel bad)
In your case it's already been 5 months, and you are still in pain. I'm almost sure there are other factors at play in here, maybe weed consumption is your excuse to not allow you to see the actual thing that is bothering you? Again, a defence mechanism that your brain is using to prevent you from greater suffering. We all have this.
The things you said in the previous post are very interesting:
"But ya my best advice is to be grateful and to be more selfless and help others. It helps me get away from thinking about myself a bit. Patience and long suffering is the route of recovery but it is Almost always worth it in the end." is very very interesting.
It's clear that you have some unfulfilled needs, or something happened in your family, close friends?, someone you lost along the way, what are you trying to escape ? If you know the road to recovery implies suffering, stop running from that thing and live that suffering, it's the only real escape route, otherwise, you'll find yourself in a loop of "poor lil' me" and childish behaviour and it will result in a poor quality of life.
You'll find your way, but not by being patient, by acting.. now.