Mental problem

#15

Postby yayada65 » Mon Apr 16, 2018 5:25 pm

Are you paranoid about people around you and stuff ? Like not thinking they are gonna hurt you but like being overly aware of their presence ? i personally cannot watch a movie with someone so much my brain will be obssessed by the person next to me, which ends up with the person next to me feeling uncomfortable so more uncomfortableness for me as well
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#16

Postby LondonScouse » Mon Apr 16, 2018 5:31 pm

Im only paranoid if they are facing my way.
But yeh the symptom is called hyper awareness I think
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#17

Postby yayada65 » Mon Apr 16, 2018 5:40 pm

idk, i want to seek help but i dont want to take pills seriously because besides the personality and paranoia, i actually have all my mind - which means my pure intelligence did not change, only my emotional intelligence. I am stuck not to ever create relationships with people because of the lack of connection but besides that my rational intelligence did not alter at all with weed - only the emotional intelligence.
Last edited by yayada65 on Mon Apr 16, 2018 5:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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#18

Postby LondonScouse » Mon Apr 16, 2018 5:44 pm

I wouldn't say mine has got worse

It was much worse when I was high and better when I am sober

It goes down a bit when I am with friends.

I also don't know if medication mbis an answer but I do know that it is important to try stuff to solve a problem

Do you exercise? I remember when I used to jog it would go down temporarily.

I also remember when drinking green tea twice it went down due to L-theanine I believe
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#19

Postby yayada65 » Mon Apr 16, 2018 5:52 pm

yes i exercice, go to the gym and play basketball all during these 3 years of process, i do have friends too but i never enjoy much spending time with them because of the paranoia and personality loss. and our relationships arent what they used to be before i smoked.
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#20

Postby LondonScouse » Mon Apr 16, 2018 5:57 pm

Yeah my emotional intelligence was significantly affected in a negative manner compared to my academic intelligence...

Even while I was smoking weed I still scored high on exams and got top marks at university then did a masters degree and got good marks again. Now I work a demanding and stressful job in London, and I am able to cope. Although even my academic intelligence took a hit from smoking weed everyday for years. I used to be able to remember and understand things easily, but now it's harder.

I don't care about my academic intelligence though, I just want to be able to feel and derive pleasure from social interactions etc...

Luckily for me i was born with good emotional intelligence and had good social intelligence until I started smoking weed at 17. I use memories of my old emotional intelligence to survive everyday social interaction.
Still though... It would be nice to have a connection with family or friends... I crave it everyday.

I honestly think its down to a lack of emotion. If we can get our emotional capacity to increase, we can form bonds with other people. I know that reading fiction books is a good way to increase empathy, and you know what they say in Neuroscience? Neurons that fire together, wire together, and if you don't use it, you lose it
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#21

Postby LondonScouse » Mon Apr 16, 2018 6:07 pm

I too have friends but I only enjoy maybe 10% of socialising. Sometimes I do genuinely laugh, but very rarely.

So for you, do you think it's got worse over the last 3 years?

Have you seen any increase in emotional capacity or expression or being spontaneous?

Any increase in social skills?

Any increase in pleasure in any respect?
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#22

Postby yayada65 » Mon Apr 16, 2018 6:11 pm

I started smoking at 16, and I always had a remarkable social intelligence, the more symbolic of that which was my sense of humor which was clearly remarkable. I knew before speaking that people would laugh - today i feel like there is a 4% chance that people will genuinely laugh from what i say. I agree with what you said - it really is 80% about the emotions, emotions make everything in a conversation. I am sure that sometimes what i say is actually cool, but the fact that I dont have the emotions while saying this makes it sounds uninterested for the other person. I tried to read a lot during those 3 years of process but it never helped. I too tried to reproduce my old self in relationships but it never is too much a of a success.
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#23

Postby yayada65 » Mon Apr 16, 2018 6:15 pm

Have you head about Derrick Rose? He' a basketball player who was MVP in 2011, he was the best player in the league, and he got injured and never got back to his former level. I really feel like this. I genuinely laugh sometimes too but i won't say my social skills increased - they did not change. the paranoia increased overtime however. but social skills remained constant. but when paranoia increases it makes your social skills declining - for example paranoia makes me avoid looking people in the eyes to a certain degree because i am paranoid about the fact that looking at people in the eyes makes me creepy, so the fact that i dont look at them in the eyes makes my social skills worse - but its due to the paranoia. thats a vicious circle
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#24

Postby yayada65 » Mon Apr 16, 2018 6:16 pm

true though, i feel like i enjoy 10% of socializing too. this gives me some hope that i could be happy about talking with someone sometimes - but it is so rarely occuring.
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