Best of Successful Weed Quitters Wisdom

Postby cleanofgreen » Fri Dec 22, 2017 11:38 am

Hi all,
I was just cleaning up my PC files and found a summary of all the great success posts I found while in the quitting stages. It helped me a lot to read it when I was feeling low and needed some inspiration. If ye have any other success stories to add to this thread be my guest and post them. It might help those struggling in the first few months.

by shodan6920 » Wed Feb 22, 2012 9:35 pm
As of tomorrow, I'm officially 365 days clean. It was far from easy, but I did it!

I'm in a far better place mentally and physically. My mental clarity is 100%, I no longer get lost half way through a sentence/conversation and forget what i was saying, I am 10 times more positive than I was before, my memory has returned 100%, I now become naturally happy and excited again and I'm completely in touch with all my emotions - something that I thought I would never be again at the worst point of my depersonalisation/derealisation. The reality check I had this time last year provided me with the desire to change, and that is what kept me going all this time.

The thing is, unless YOU yourself really want to change; you wont succeed. ( The worst part is most people have to hit rock bottom in their lives until they realise - I know i did) No-one can make you quit weed, or any addiction. Only yourself. Theres a lot of helpful information on preparing to quit knocking around on this site and the rest of the net that is vital to changing your lifestyle - but unless you have the underlying desire and willpower to push yourself and turn your life around and say NO when someone you associate with offers "just one drag cause it won't hurt", you won't last. Plenty of people relapse (I have on 4 occassions) but you gotta pick yourself back up and persevere, its surprising what you can acheive through hard work and determination.

Although the past few months have been tough due to being depressed (split up with my long term gf recently as well as other sh** going off) I've now beaten my addiction for good and I'm now facing my fears head on without the hazy crutch weed provides.

If anyone has any questions you're more than welcome to email me (

I won't be posting for a while, recently I've spent too much time sitting at home surfing the net reading posts and while they have been really helpful i havent been actively working on lifting this depression thats hanging on.

Thanks for reading, I hope this post helps others realise they can beat their addiction, no matter how the odds are stacked against them.

No going back now. Me: 1 - Weed: - 0

by shodan6920 » Thu Feb 28, 2013 1:52 pm
23/02/13 marked my 2 year quit date, and after some unusual temptations (never had any prior to 3 months ago) during the past few months I have managed to deter my thoughts from pursuing the urge to smoke and reached my 2 year goal!

The symptoms and side effects from quitting weed (which you can read about in my previous threads - 1 year without weed & 10 months clean) have done a complete U- turn. My fear and anxiety, general and social, have completely disappeared. Don't get me wrong I still get nervous, however I feel the fear, view it positively and get excited by it now. This time 2 years ago I was suffering panic attacks simply at the thought of engaging in normal conversation without being stoned, as my life solely revolved around it for so long it was literally all I had - I had no ability to relate to anyone else on any grounds but drugs. However now, I'm in the midst of hopefully landing a job in sales where I will be facing new people everyday, and getting excited by how much variety it will bring into my work life. Heck, I actually want a work life! If this opportunity was presented to me 2 years ago I would have more than likely politefully declined, whilst suffering a MASSIVE panic attack. I'm sure many of you can relate to that.

Day to day life now I never think about weed - albeit apart from a few months ago - however I believe part of the reason I was tempted was because I was finally felt normal again and literally struggled to remember how bad life really was 2 - 3 years ago. Even writing this is bringing back memories of how dull and lifeless I was, which in turn is reinforcing my decision not to smoke further.

I hope reading this post gives hope to you that are all in the very first steps of quitting. I myself felt lost, incredibly insecure and had no self esteem/self confidence whatsoever. I really thought that was it. That was how I was going to be, period. 2 years on, & I couldn't have been more wrong. Abstinence from weed does yield great results, I myself am amazed at the change in myself, I'm exactly how I used to be personality wise, with a hell of a lot more life experience and self control too.

I know because I've done it. I'm 110% back to me and how I want to be. This is what I envisaged, and if I'm honest, I didn't think I had a chance of getting to this stage after how bad I was. Anyway, in closing I'd like to thank all the people who have posted on here, in the early days those posts helped a LOT, which is why I'm returning the favour. Good luck in your quits guys, if you really want it you can have it, no matter how the odds are stacked against you. Granted, it takes time. But for how good life is without weed, its really a no brainer.

by biggiesize » Thu Dec 18, 2008 1:52 pm
Today marks 5 and a half months since I left my relationship with Mary Jane.Would I go back?NEVER in a million years.At first it was terrible.The insomnia,the dreams,the uncoordination,the confusion and the brain fog.After about a month,the withdrawals were gone.Then I entered a period where my brain had to recover from heavy smoking.I literally thought I had screwed my brain up forever.I began to get depressed and almost turned back, thinking that It was no use if I had screwed my head up.But thanks to God and many people I met on here I kept going.It took until now for my brain to feel normal again.But I feel like I did before I ever started smoking weed.Im happy,I feel emotions again,I get excited about things and most of all,I have my life back.A life that consists of more than just sitting with "friends" and getting stoned and only leaving to either get more weed or to go get something to cure my munchies.
To anyone who is thinking about quitting or who is struggling to quit,I strongly urge you to hang in there.It is a long road.There will be days where you just want to say **** it and roll a fat one.But if you hang in there and give your brain time to recooperate you will experience life to the fullest.Good luck to you all and Merry Christmas!

I am 2 days away from Day 100 without smoking weed. It has been a journey. I have learned so much about myself in these 14 weeks; gratitude goes out to all who inspired me and continue to walk this path of self-discovery!

I was walking around a lake yesterday, thinking about how I used to always get stoned before any ‘nature time’. I had formerly thought that pot gave me a stronger connection to the surroundings, but now I realize that was not true. As I breathed in the fresh autumn air, I was filled with feelings of deep empowerment: “I am small in this world, but I control my own destiny.”

Previously (for the better part of 2 decades) my moods were under the control of dried plant parts in a baggie (pathetic!). I am taking charge here. Deciding to make a positive self-transformation is no small task: there are tears, panic, anxiety and pain. Working through these takes self-discipline. I have had to dig deep, beneath layers of immaturity and escapism, to my core. I have been forced to reach out and admit my own vulnerability. It has been worth it. I have a stronger sense of optimism about my life than has ever existed previously.

To all who are struggling with withdrawals, cravings, and depression, this goes out to you. I have been to the edge, looked over, and quested into the abyss of self-doubt. I send a message back to you: it gets better, it gets lighter, and the dark night will finally pass.

See you in the sunshine of clarity!

"Getting out of it: How to cut down or quit cannabis" by Helen Mentha

y Transformer » Thu Feb 16, 2017 12:47 am
Hi everyone!

I just wanted to share my experiences getting through one of the hardest, if not the most challenging experience of my life... f***ing WEED PAWS!

I'm currently 9 months off the green and never felt better..

To let you know, I have been smoking weed since I was 15 and by the time I was 19 was smoking everyday until the age of 34. I would take breaks from weed for a few weeks at a time when I was overseas, although I would often find it at the places I visited, or I would quit when I was doing exams at university. I was always a very productive stoner~ I have 2 degrees, was a criminal lawyer and was always extremely fit. I would run 10 miles on weekends but I would always be high doing it. I found weed enhanced any activity I did, so I was basically high all the time. I could justify my weed in take because it didn't hamper my productivity (how wrong I was in retrospect!). I was a wake and baker, often 2-3 joints before going to work in the morning just to feel relaxed and I would smoke on my lunch break and when I got home I'd smoke a joint on high THC weed (Critical Kush) every 30 minutes from 5pm til 1am. I used weed to get me to sleep at night as well, i found it to be a great sleeping aid. I also suffered from anxiety attacks that would hit me every 6 months due to the pressures of my career, so once they came on I would smoke my way out of them. I only say this because I want people to know that I wasn't just an occasional smoker, I smoked harddd for 20+ years. If I can recover from weed addiction, you can too

About a month before my 34 birthday I had a severe anxiety attack that landed me in hospital for the night. As I lay in my hospital bed kind of shaking and freaking out i thought, man this ordeal would be a lot easier to comprehend if I wasn't so high all the time. So I decided to quit the next day. It wasn't just that but I'd gotten bored with my stoner lifestyle; always worrying about scoring the next bag (got so bad that I ended up buying a pound), always paranoid I stunk of weed (which i did!), always having to wake up and clean up the last night mess of empty plates and candy wrappers, vacuuming the weed off the table and couch, always upset with my stoner friends who would come over just to sit on my couch and get high, same boring activities every night~ a sh** movie or playing video games, never going out with friends!!

Anyway the next morning I got home and took the pound of weed I had stashed and gave it away to my smoker friends, it was easy to do because I honestly didn't want to smoke. The first week is hell as everyone knows from quitting for a week or 2. No appetite, no sleep, heavy sweating, vivid dreams etc. I got through that by taking Valium to get to sleep which helped a lot. I was also prescribed an anti seizure medication that works well for recovering alcoholics, starts with a B but I can't remember what they were, sorry! They worked great for the first 3 weeks, getting me to sleep and actually making me feel happy. By the 3rd week I thought I didn't need them anymore and everything was going to be fine...

Then around week 3 or 4, sh** got real...

I got home one night from my Ju Jitsu class and got into bed. I suddenly felt really hot, I opened a window to cool down but I felt like my legs were on fire and my heart was racing. I didn't sleep that night which I thought was odd as my sleeping patterns had got back to normal. Then I didn't sleep the next night, and the next night, and the next, and so on and so on. I ended up not sleeping for 3 weeks. I started to FREAK OUT. I also started to get really bad anxiety and depression, I went to see my GP 3 or 4 times in one week. First he told me to take tamazepam which didn't work, I'd sleep for 2 hours then wake up with crippling anxiety. Then I tried Ambien which had the same effect, I'd wake up after it initially knocked me out and then I'd stay awake all night. My insomnia got so bad I developed a hypnic jerk which essentially flushing your body with adrenaline on the verge on sleep so you stay awake for another 3-4 hours, body racing with anxiety, before it happens again. I turned into a COMPLETE MESS! I had to take 3 weeks off work because I had come extremely depressed. I cried all day. I went on a holiday to try and get some RnR but that didn't work. I cravvvved sweet foods which I never before had (symptom of depression) and I just couldnt relax no matter what I was doing. I couldnt go to the gym because I kept thinking, 'whats the point?'. I actually started to think that about life, like whats the point in life everyones going to die anyway so what the point in trying? (I know its a terrible way to think about life but I obviously wasn't thinking right at the time, no one with depression does). I decided to leave my holiday early to speak to a professional because I was going out for dinner at night and just crying at the table, in front of slightly terrifed and freaked out tourists.

I found a good physiologist and I was given Mirtazapine (Remeron) by my GP, an antidepressant which is used for sleep, I used 7.5mg and that got me to sleep for a solid 6-7 hours but I would wake up with music in my head which I have heard is common among recovering long term weed heads. I also had really weird and vivid dreams. I would have these mental blocks in my head during the day at work and I couldnt seem to function properly. I was also told by my GP that I had severe depression from other life circumstances but deep down I knew it was from the weed. This site was a total blessing as I could see my own problems mirrored a lot of the other recovering addicts symptoms. I was given a number of antidepressants to use, Zoloft, Lexipro another one that started with C but I couldnt get through the first weeks side effects with any of them (insomnia and terrible anxiety) and looking back I'm glad I didn't because ultimately I didn't need them, it was all a process of my body and brain letting go of the devil'l lettuce.

I read a great post here, viewtopic.php?t=74133, I still have this bookmarked on my internet browser that I would often read for support when I was feeling down and out. It said that it takes AT LEAST 6 months to start to feel better and at least 8 months before you start to feel normal again, and as much as it sucks to tell you guys who are just quitting, its really true. Months 2-6 are fuckkkking terrible. You get no enjoyment out of anything because your senses are just f***ed up by all the THC thats been running through your system and you're body is saying to your brain or vice versa "Hey I really liked this stuff!, I'm so used to it, what are you doing? if you don't give me anymore I'm going to make you so miserable that you'll eventually have no choice but to give me some!!!!"

But once you hit 6 months you start to feel it, you're not 100% better but you start to feel happier and start to notice things that made you happy previously start to again, and because you've been so miserable for so long, even a little bit of joy is really noticeable! After a while your mind starts to feel normal again, trust me I was the biggest stoner ever, if I can do it YOU CAN TOO!! TRUST ME!!!

Things that helped; TIME AND PATIENCE.. I'd love to give you a list of supplements that work but I'm not too sure any of them did. I think a lot of them are snake oil but if you want to try go for it! They might help you! I would suggest taking anything that chills you out to a certain extent. Magnesium powder is great for anxiety as it relaxes the muscles. Even a good herbal tea too. A warm bath also helps too! And so does hanging out with your pets or your family (if you get along and like your family that is!). I guess the only thing that truely works is time and the patience to know that eventually you're body will go back to normal. A few alcoholic drinks help too, I was never a big drinker in my smoking days but I've found a glass of red wine to be fantastic when you need to unwind. I know it sounds hypocritical to go from one substance to another but I can handle a glass or 2 of wine every other night, and I don't have to pound a glass before I go to work in the morning like I did with weed!

Exercise is great too! I've gotten back into my activities and taking care of your body is a fantastic way to show yourself why you shouldn't be smoking weed all the time. Also, as much as its probably not a good idea to slip into the habit, prescription drugs such as Xanax, Klonopin and Valium do serve a purpose when they are needed. My only regret in my journey is not taking them when I truely needed to. I have a lot of friends who have become addicted to them and I often would not take them when I was feeling like sh** because I thought I would also become addicted but when you're feeling extremely anxious its ok to take them, thats what they were designed for. Remember the aim is to limit how sh** you are feeling for those initial bad times and anything short of doing weed again is a good thing.

After 6-8 months you start to live your life almost exactly how you did before you stopped smoking but with all these cool new hobbies and a better appreciation for life, I know it sounds corny but its TRUE!!! Your brain is clearer and your understanding of your own issues as well as your friends becomes much deeper. My psychologist told me that when you are on drugs your emotions are put on hold and stop developing. I can 10000% say that is true. Since quitting I've become so much more emotionally stable and I think a lot of the depression I suffered from was dealing with the fact that I had put my emotions on hold for 20 years. Before, if i had a tough emotional issue to deal with I'd say **** it and smoke a joint to hide the issue I couldnt be bothered dealing with under a massive cloud of weed smoke. I'm SOOO happy to say now that its not the case anymore! I deal with it whether its hard or not, I don't hide anymore in pot use. I've got an amazing girlfriend at the moment who I only just met and if you were to ask me during those 2-6 months when I had just started quitting if I could ever be emotionally stable enough to maintain a relationship I would have bet my life savings that I would have said "no f***ing way, I'm a mess and will probably be a mess for the rest of my life!" I met a girl during that time and I could hardly string a sentence together, i felt like such a waste of space that I basically went into a hole, I had no confidence at all. As weird as it is to say, I got my speech back by thinking to myself that I spent years trying to talk normally to others when I was high, so it might take me some time to speak normally now that I was straight. I know it sounds crazy but it worked for me.

I'd just like to say a HUGE thank you to the countless people on this site who have posted about their struggles and how they dealt with them as I honestly believe this site helped me more than any other medical "professional" has so far and I've been to plenty! (4 physiologists, 2 psychiatrists, 5 GPs, 2 anxiety specialists). Its just unfortunate that the medical industry doesn't seem to think weed PAWS is a thing they should be looking at but as someone who's gone through it, I can say with certainty that is was the hardest thing i've ever experienced in my life!! Don't kid yourself, you'll need to be as strong as you've ever been to get through this period of your life. But if I can, you can. You'll be a different person once you get through it. You'll have a few battle scared but you'll be stronger than ever! Whats that old saying about when you break something it grows back stronger? Well in this case you'll grow STRONG AS ****! Like a mental Hercules!!

This forum give you the best medicine available~ HOPE!! Hope is all you need. Just know that eventually it will go away, whatever PAWS you're dealing with, its all a matter of time! To anyone reading this, I love you for the person you're trying to become, you're truely doing something good for yourself and it will benefit everyone you know and love. If you're in hell right now, know that its only a matter of time before you bust on through to the other side and feel happy again.

I still deal with a little bit of depression here and there but its manageable, life's not supposed to be easy and you can't always be happy. BUT as the as the days and weeks go by I feel better and better about the decision I had to quit weed all those months ago when I was lying in a hospital bed. Best decision I've ever made. I'm always here if you need me guys! Stay strong you won't regret it!! Xoxoxo

by overcome » Sun Apr 29, 2012 5:48 pm
Hi everyone!

(sorry if my English in this post isn't flawless, it's not my main language)

Last year, daily pot smoking was becoming unbearable. My memory and mood were getting seriously affected, and paranoia was my constant companion.

I quit smoking pot on mid August of 2011. On September, an unwelcome full blown depression started. Spontaneous crying spells were not uncommon. I was constantly extremely anxious. What scared me the most was that I couldn't think straight, my focus was nonexistent, I had to make an enormous effort to speech properly, to keep my attention on what was being said to me and basically felt like a retarded. In social settings I acted in a really awkward way, I knew it and couldn't help it. I couldn't sleep properly and woke up in the middle of the night with my heart pounding and in a big anxiety attack. I felt no pleasure for any activity, no motivation, no hope whatsoever and my libido was below zero.

Since I was in this situation for a long time, I was starting to believe that I had made some kind of permanent damage to my brain. I thought of suicide daily and was starting to plan it.

I'm studying psychology, and because the negative symptoms of schizophrenia are similar to those of major depression, I was really afraid that I had become schizophrenic. To spice things up, I went to a psychiatrist and he prescribed me an antidepressant (wellbutrin) that made my anxiety even worse but helped somewhat with my focus and motivation. But it had an awful side effect: I started hearing music in my head all the time, 24/7. It wasn't quite an hallucination, the music didn't came from anywhere, I knew it was in my head but it kept repeating and scaring the sh*t out of me. In the beginning I didn't associated it with the medication and thought it was a positive symptom of schizophrenia, but then I started searching the web I found other people that had the same 'music in the head all the time' effect from wellbutrin and it stopped after they stopped the medication.

I started therapy with an experienced psychologist and he was absolutely sure that I wasn't a schizophrenic. It was a relief. I stopped the medication and the f*cking strange music in my head went away.

What REALLY helped me was reading this forum. I can't thank you enough for all the shared experiences. So, I'm giving back my experience to this forum. It took about 8 months for some people to fully recover. So, I started a reversed calendar, with how many days are left until the 8 month mark. I also started taking an Omega-3 supplement (which I still take everyday) since it helped many people.

I only started seeing a notable improvement in the 5 months mark after I quit smoking pot. My motivation, intelligence and social skills were getting back, my paranoia, anxiety and crying spells were going away. I was becoming my old/normal self again.

When I hit the 8 month mark, I was (and am) fully 100% recovered.

I'd like to say to anyone experiencing the nightmare that I had gone through to hold tight, things will REALLY get better, and you will get out of that hole stronger than before.

And as Winston Churchill (who also suffered from episodes of depression) said: "If your going through hell, keep going."

Also, consider taking the Omega-3 supplement, it will eventually help the repair process of your neurochemistry.

I don't wish to demonize weed. I respect the plant and it's history as a tool for searching through consciousness and it's medicinal and plain recreational value - but misused and abused, the results can be catastrophic.

Wishing you all the best!

Good day fellow quitters.

I've officially, well and truly passed 6 months. I actually forgot I had passed the 6 month mark. I'll be honest. Early on in my process I did have two slip ups but they really don't count as once I did slip up, I just moved on.

How do I feel now compared to before I quit? I used to have all the nasty mood swings. I was rarely really and naturally happy. I think realistically the only time I was happy back then was on my way home for the first joint. Once I had the first joint I was only again happy for about half an hour. Now I just have a more consistent mood and for the most part it's happy. If I do feel down, upset or angry I know there's a real reason why I feel that way. It's no longer because I can't get weed or have maybe even had too much weed.

I was impulsive. I tried tro fix all of my issues in a day. Then I'd pat myself on the back with weed. I never really got anywhere. I'd make a promise to myself on a Sunday night to quit and fix things. I would have a productive Monday but always crack and smoke in the evening. What's worse is that I would justify my smoke on the fact that I'd been productive that day.

My social life is improving daily. I never really had relationships when I smoked weed. The only real relationship I had was with weed. Everyone came second to me and my lady weed. If I did go out and meet new people I would usually either be half baked and not really communicate or I would usually be one of the first to leave to go home to the ball and chain that was weed. Now when I go out I make a point of talking to everyone and NOT being the first to leave. This doesn't just happen overnight though. I'm learning more and more daily about social situations. I usually didn't care as I used to just think people were what kept me from weed. I'm even having nice relationships with women. I'm enjoying just taking things slowly and sharing with them. For once, relationships are nice things.

Financially I'm so much better off. £300 per month better off. I've already rewarded myself with one holiday and I plan on rewarding myself with others. I enjoy travelling more now. It's great not being paranoid in new places. My inquisitive side is coming back and pairing that with my new found love of people, it's fantastic.

I'm looking so much more healthy. My face has colour and looks healthy. I used to look almost skeletal in the face. I've always been slim but I used to always skip meals for joints. Now I eat when I'm hungry and I take time to eat healthy.

I'm writing this mainly for new quitters. I want you to know that 8 months ago I had two choices. One was stay on weed and ultimately know my fate. It wasn't a good fate and I honestly used to think about simply ending my lonely, sad, pathetic existence. I knew weed had control over me and I really thought I wouldn't get away from it. The other choice was to simply give quitting a try. I knew I wanted to and I knew I needed to. I just didn't know how to. I feared the unknown, I feared being alone without weed, I hated myself and thought I couldn't become a better man. 6 months later I'm much more confident, infinitely happier, healthier, nicer and many other things more. I’m still cautious and have my guard up. I was hooked for nearly 15 years. It won't all be fixed in 6 months and I'm sure I will always have to keep my guard up a little but by making small changes in the critical aspects of my life, it's paying off like I never could have imagined.

by shodan6920 » Fri Dec 30, 2011 4:14 pm
I think the time has come for me to post on how im doing on here, as reading through this forum helped me while i was in the process of quitting.

So, on the 23rd of February this year I decided enough was enough. I had dedicated my life to a drug for way too long. So i quit, cold turkey.

This was probably the 4th or 5th quitting attempt (smoked daily from being 14 to 18), before then i only managed just over 7 weeks in August 2010, but i gave in thinking i could control my use and smoke in moderation, we've all been there, haha. In that 7 weeks i managed to get myself a part time job (working as a kitchen assistant/potwasher, which in itself was hard due to the amount of anxiety, low self esteem and panic attacks i was experiencing because of the withdrawal)and started to smoke, now and again at the start, until i became tolerant again and was going to work stoned out my head day in day out.

I knew had to quit, I had finished college and my life was going nowhere, & i had no social life apart from meeting with dealers and a few so called "friends", that you soon realise are only interested in you if youve got weed, money, or a car to get weed.

So 6 months later, I quit. I also had to quit my job, because i just couldnt cope with the anxiety.

The first few weeks were the worst. I had an unbelievable amount of anxiety. I would have panic attacks 24/7, which left me feeling physically & emotionally drained. Along with all the negative thoughts, feelings of shame, depersonalisation, guilt, depression and hopelessness, it was a rough time, and eventually got myself to the doctors and was prescribed beta blockers which helped. I got rid of everything to do with weed too, ( gave them to a buddy at the time, he was over the moon haha), bongs, rizlas, scales, contacts, tobacco, grinder, seeds & sold my last 8th.

I had done a lot of research on what to expect when quitting so I was fairly well prepared, and had built of strong mindset of what i wanted to achieve & gave myself around a year to get myself mentally fit again.

The 90 day mark was what i was aiming for. Most websites i had seen said that THC would be out of your system by then, and you would be completely back to normal. However when i got to the 3 month point i was still completely detached, feeling no emotion but panic, and still feeling as if i was on a weed hangover. This is the point where the biggest temptation to smoke again came, where I thought i was better (or more like it wasnt going to get better than this), but i stayed strong and read some posts on here about the length of recovery, which helped reinforce my descision and beat the craving, and at about the 6 month mark i could see a much better improvement in overall brain function and the fog was lifting finally!

So, 4 months on from there here I am. I would say mentally my brain is working at about 70 - 75% of what it used to, however i am still struggling to decide which path to take now. Another big part of quitting is also finding a new social circle to be a part of, which is a mission in itself, as everyone I used to hang around with before i smoked is busy moving on with their lives at university etc.

Overall, its a battle worth fighting. I've been in the position where you think it is harmless, the perfect pass time & much better than alcohol - to the point where you cannot function without it and it starts to slowly destroy you in every way possible.

But now, i can say that I feel naturally happy again. my brain chemicals are balanced again and i can now enjoy life, and make something of myself, instead of sitting on my backside thinking "il do it later/tomorrow". Unbelieveable how much ive changed for the better, and for anyone thinking about quitting, just do it, you wont regret it, it will be the best decision you have ever made, trust me!
by b » Sun Oct 04, 2009 9:17 pm
He all,

I've made a couple of posts on this forum, my last being "Effects still visible 5 months after quitting?" (check my profile for it if interested).

Here's a sum up of my story.

Untill last January I had been smoking loads of strong weed for about 9 years, I'm 25 now. With exception of in total maybe a couple of months due to holidays I smoked every day, and damn strong stuff too (I live in Holland).
After stopping I felt the crappiest I had ever felt. Totally depressed and not wanting to do anything. I had the same symptoms anyone has, only some seemed to be unusual and last a lot longer. I was in that negative of a mindset that the thought of suicide came along quite frequently (I wasn't making any plans or so but for instance back then I thought a freak accident or deadly disease would have been great, for then I could die without taking the 'cowardly' way, and hurting people close to me even more). Anyway I was diagnosed with a depression and started taking medicine, that lasted for a couple of months.
Even 5 months after quitting I was still in quite a negative mindset, without ever before suffering from that kind negativity, but then again I was 'medicating' myself for nearly a decade with weed so who knows what was really going down in my repressed mind. Basically half a year after quitting I was still feeling the effects of recovery, and was getting worried I maybe screwed my brain up for life, and would either have to stay on meds or go back smoking again, to feel 'happy'.

Things are so much better nowadays. Major changes inside of me have come along and most of the negativity is gone. I actually feel like socialising again, even with non stoners lol. My outlook on life has become so much more realistic, I can put things in a logic perspective now, and not only live in my own dreamworld. Most aspects on the lists of positive changes from quitting listed on this forum have also affected me:)

Offcourse not everything is great, not being able to escape in the mindset of being stoned is something I do miss. It's just great to zone out now and again. So even more than 8 months after quitting I'd still love to have a smoke (at least I think I would), but many people know that can be sooo tricky... Who knows someday I'll try and be succesfull in only smoking now and again, but maybe by that time I think I'd be ready to try I wouldn't even feel like trying cause it's not on my mind anymore.

Anyway I guess what I need to say is that even now effects are still taking place, and mental processes are still changing (improving). I was hoping to see more effects sooner but I'm happy now I had the patience to keep the quit going. I know it's been said many times before but I'll have to say it again 'life get's better after quitting', even though it takes allot longer with some depending on individual circumstances.

Lol thanks to anyone that read this far, it became a bit longer than I anticipated. Good luck if you're about to quit or still struggling with quitting!


by johnrlivingston » Sun Jan 04, 2015 1:31 am
Thanks so much, Furtive. Now that I'm in a better frame of mind I know the truth of your words. It's amazing how much one's perception can be skewed during our neurochemical 'lows'.

Anyway - I have good news. News I couldn't until my next 'report' to share...

I HAD MY FIRST ANXIETY-FREE DAY EVER SINCE QUITTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 4 freakin' months, and this is the first day I can say I've felt 'normal' all the way through. I'm soooooooooooo stoked. I've had days when my anxiety was low, but I never had one completely free of it until now.

I know it won't last - but man - its feels SO GOOD to have one day underneath me that wasn't spoiled with illness. If I had one I'll have more. Just need to give it more time (I keep telling myself).
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by johnrlivingston » Tue Jan 13, 2015 3:31 pm
Your experience is the same as mine, new-me. The waves of anxiety-related problems keep coming & going in a seemingly unpredictable fashion, but when viewed over the course of recovery, are following a predictable pattern of diminishing in intensity & duration as time passes.

I celebrate a milestone today... 4 MONTHS WEED-FREE!!!! (alcohol-free as well).

Looking back it's hard to believe it's only been 4 months (5, actually, if you count cutting down). Not that 4 months isn't a long time, but it seems like it's been much longer. These past 4 months have been hard on me. But I believe I'm finally at the point where I can say - with all honestly - that I'm better off now than I was when I was smoking. And despite the problems I still face, the benefits of quitting outweigh the the negatives.

I've also realized that - without doubt - I'm much better off than I was during the first 3 months of this hell, and that my progress in healing is undeniable. It's definitely not going as fast as I'd like, but healing is progressing at its own pace.

Of course, as I write this, I'm in an 'up' phase. I've only had a couple really bad days since the new year. I'm certain once the next wave of PAWS comes I'll think the sky is falling again. But I also know I'll soldier through it, as I have done up till now, to meet a bluer sky at the end.

It wasn't long ago I couldn't even conceive of lasting the 1-2 years for complete recovery many people claim is necessary. Now I've reached the point where I know I can. And will.
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by johnrlivingston » Sun Feb 22, 2015 9:24 pm
Hello Friends!!!

It's been a while since i've checked in here, but I'm now at over the 5 month mark since quitting (160 days, I believe, to be precise). Since the new year things have drastically improved for me, and the month of february has so far seen even more positive changes.

At this point, I'm sleeping normally most every night - getting 8 hours in no problem - and my dreams, while still somewhat vivid some nights, are no longer dark or scary in the least. I'm back to dreaming 'good dreams' most of the time, and even when I have nightmares (very rare), they don't leave a lasting impression after waking. They're 'just dreams'.

My anxiety is also MUCH improved. Most days it no longer causes me issue, except for the predictable peaks in the early morning and middle of the evening. But even at those times the feeling is usually little more than mild discomfort. Sometimes I start thinking back to how absolutely crippling my anxiety was in the first few months and can't help but laugh - overjoyed at knowing I've overcome distress which, at the time, seemed almost overwhelming.

My mood is - for the most part - stable and healthy. I still experience waves of what I consider to be PAWS, but the trend continues... they come less frequently, don't last nearly as long (days rather than weeks), and are MUCH less severe. When I do go through these, my depression and increased anxiety are usually very short-term and completely maneagable.

I'm still having problems with muscle tension, spasms, and eye issues - as well as the aforementioned anxiety-issues that, while greatly reduced, are still present. I'm also still suffering from tinnitus, which, at this point, I believe is also related to the muscle spasms. I'm starting to consider the possibility that these problems might have been something weed actually helped (as marijuana definitely shows promise w/ MS, dystonia, etc), but it's too early to tell. Muscle spasms & tinnitus appear to be a prominent feature of protracted withdrawal seen in people w/ benzo dependence, so perhaps mj can cause similar issues as well. Regardless - whether it's the cause or 'cure' for these problems - mj is certainly the cause of too many problems to consider going back. If at the end of my 1-year mark I'm still having trouble, I might seek medical attention for these problems if they still exist. But I won't be self-medicating w/ weed, that's for sure!

My mental clarity, memory, and cognitive ability continue to improve, as well as my self-confidence. I'm now considering getting back into software development (left that 10+ years ago), and have been studying many hours / day to that end. I'm still working out as often as I can (though my muscular issues make that a challenge at times) as well. I'm SO MUCH BETTER OFF, both physically and mentally, than I ever was while using. Whatever challenges I still face now are minor in comparison to how sick I was near the end of my abuse cycle.

One last thing: 2 weeks or so ago during a mild PAWS 'flare-up' I remember worrying that my anxiety would prevent me from ever handling stress the way I used to (I used to be a rock in 'bad times'). Today my most beloved dog came down ill, showing similar problems to his father who died of kidney failure. I had every reason to fall into anxiety and panic, but the anxiety never came. Thankfully a trip to the vet relieved my fears, but even if it had been bad, it taught me I am returning to the person I used to be - the person who can handle the worst life has to throw at me. THE ANXIETY NEVER CAME. If this had happened 2 months ago, I'd be a wreck right now - guaranteed.
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by johnrlivingston » Thu May 28, 2015 2:50 am
Well, it's been a long time since I've been here guys, but I'm now sitting at 8 1/2 months!!!!!!

I'm not going to spend a lot of time on this post as I have in the past. All I can say is that while I continue to struggle, I can't deny that I'm slowly getting better. Better than my last post back in February by far, better even still than on New Year's eve when I cried wondering if I'd be able to handle this all, and SO MUCH BETTER than the first 3 months which almost seem unreal to me now knowing what I went through.

I still have problems with anxiety and the physical problems relating to it. But I'm getting better. It's now a much more unpredictable pattern. Some days I'll barely be troubled by it at all, other days it's more of a bother. As I'm sure I've written before - my recovery is going much more slowly than I'd like - but it's progressing.

I can say that I'm 100% recovered in one aspect - and that's in my sleep. I SLEEP LIKE A BABY NOW!!!!! Honestly better than I ever slept while smoking. And I dream like crazy, but now my dreams are what I consider 'normal'... mostly good, sometimes dreary, but nothing that upsets me the next day like they used to.

I have many moments when I doubt the cause of my issues. But I have to remind myself that it literally took me over well over 6 MONTHS just for my sleep to return to normal. So I really shouldn't be surprised that other problems continue to linger. My tinnitus, as an example, is still present. But its no longer constant (or at least I don't perceive it constantly) and even at it worst it's nowhere near what it used to be.

Anyway - I'll check back in after a month or two more, hopefully with more promising news. Stay strong, my friends!
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y johnrlivingston » Wed Sep 16, 2015 5:39 pm
If there's one thing good I can say about protracted withdrawal it's this: Time slows to a crawl. Because the last year has taken fooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeevvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvveeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrr to pass.

Wait. Did I say the last year? Well yes... yes I did. Because today marks my ONE YEAR MARKfrom quitting weed!!!!

How do I feel? Better than ever since this nightmare started. In fact, this past month has seen another round of dramatic changes which have me bordering on what I'd consider to be 'normal'. Better than 'normal', actually, for I'm certainly a better person for having survived and learned from what has, without any doubt, been the most difficult year of my life.

Funny thing... a few weeks ago I was considering going back in an effort to 'heal my endocannabinoid system'. At that time my anxiety had started to fade but daily migraines had taken its place. The thought of going back made me sick, but the daily unrelenting pain was getting the best of me. Thankfully, I stumbled on NateTGreat''s thread, and derived strength from his decision to push his efforts out to 2 years after still having problems. It was at that time I decided to do the same. Two or three weeks after that point, my migraines started breaking up, and the anxiety that had left with their coming... STAYED GONE!!!!!

For at least the past 2-3 weeks, I've only had a handful of minor, short-lived 'anxiety feelings' that go as quick as they come - so mild they're hardly worth mentioning - and my migraines are beginning to follow the same pattern. I truly believe the migraines were just another part of my neurochemistry returning to normal, and as I continue to heal, I expect them to reduce even more.

For any one reading this, the saying "It always seems darkest before the dawn" describes the healing process as I've experienced it to a 'T'. It's the windows & waves pattern. Every time I've realized a big improvement, it's been preceded by an especially hard time. It's like descending from the highest peak in a range of mountains to a green valley many miles away... the overall slope is downhill, but there are many hard climbs between you and that grassy pasture. And while each climb is likely a little less strenuous the farther you go, the fatigue of climbing for so long can make it seem like each climb is worse than the one before.

The way I see it, I've just topped the final peak - the one where I can finally see that green valley - and while I have no doubt I'll have a few more stumbles before I reach it - maybe even a few more boulders to climb - reaching it is inevitable.

Funny story: The last time I posted here - during my last challenging 'uphill climb' - some clown who I had previously disagreed with over the possibility of full recovery chimed in with a PM to tell me he was right. It was his belief that the damage done by abuse couldn't be undone. That it was permanent. I called BS then and I'm especially calling BS now. Perhaps your defeatist attitude is permanent, Bozo, but healing is certainly possible for any that believe it to be. That's the nice way of saying what I'd prefer saying, but I'm not trying to get kicked of the forum just yet

Cliff Notes: 1 year past weed I've been through hell, am actually glad for the experience, and while I'm not 100%, I'd put myself at a solid 85. At the 2-year mark I have no doubt I'll be a better man than I've ever been, in every way imaginable
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Postby Mimihops10 » Fri Dec 29, 2017 8:37 am

What a great collection of inspiration and reassurance !

Im just over 7 months and this helps keeping me focused :)
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Postby SoulFull » Fri Dec 29, 2017 2:33 pm

Yes thank you for this cleanofgreen. This is fantastic. I'm 3 months free and need as much motivation as I can to reassure myself that I can do this.

Keep up the good work!
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Postby Bagobones » Tue Jun 12, 2018 10:03 am

Ill put this thread up again! Its important for the people thats 2-3 months inn, that are not quite believing its a light at the end of the tunnel. What I see is that its some that struggle for 2-3 years, but in my research, I found relieve in finding alot of the struggling people started to feel better periods (days-weeks) at 6 month, and at 8-9 months alot where preaching that they saw a solution, that they felt fine again. So I feel the avarage for hardcore stoners is about a year. Ill start with Cleanofgreen and Soulfull and their inspiring successfull journeys. Ill also quote soberchic, since she has been through it all, legal state, benzos, alcohol etc etc. A very tough and chic soberchic that woman... :)

cleanofgreen wrote:9 Months Weed and Alcohol Free

Well the 26th has passed again and I've reached 9 months clean of weed and the changes in the last 1.5 months have been massive. The depression and crippling anxiety that plagued me 24/7 from 1.5 to 6 months, and the morning anxiety from 6 - 7.5 months is completely gone , it's like someone removed a plastic bag from my head and I can finally breathe freely again. All I can say is that for any heavy long term smokers struggling in the first few months with doubts about whether they will ever be normal again is to stick with it, it does get better with a lot of time, things turned around for me at 7.5 to 8 months. It was without doubt the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. Quitting weed is a process, it's something that happens gradually over time, by the time you get the feedback, all the hard work is all ready done.
A bit of advice for those in the process of quitting, there's no point in continually looking back and beating yourself up for the past mistakes or wasted years, look back once learn from the mistake and start moving forward. It's like looking at your child learning to run where they are being chased and keep looking behind them whilst running forward and eventually fall and hurt themselves. This is the same for all life, while trying to move forward you can't keep looking at the past or you'll end up hurting yourself.

I spent many years as a stoner trying to spend my life in the comfort zone, not trying to improve anything, just trying to remain in the status quo, but as life is constantly changing and if you're not moving forward then in reality your being dragged backward by the river of life. Make the correct choices every day and edge your way up the river of life little by little, when you make the right choice, you won’t see the results. At least, not today. That's a hard concept to grasp for a stoner who's used to instant gratification. If I smoke this I'll feel better about myself and my life, no you have to work for those feelings. You might feel better for an hour or so, but your problems will still be there when the haze lifts whether that be in an hour, a day, or 20 years from now, all the while the problems compounding as each day passes by.

I've noting against weed, it has many great medical and recreational uses, but people have to realise that you can't use medical marijuana(high thc %) recreationally which is what most people are doing nowadays. The fact that heroin addicts can withdraw by using medical marijuana should be a warning sign, this stuff is not the same weed that was being smoked 25 years ago.

TLDR: I've gone 9 months clean and have come back from the hell of the first 6 or 7 months, around 8 months I started feeling normal again losing all depression and anxiety. The brain is functioning much quicker and the brain fog seems to be coming less frequent. My motivation is starting to kick back in, although still a little lazy, and the happiness doing things I used to enjoy doing is back. Overall I'm feeling very good. For all those struggling, I know what hell you're going through but stick with it and you'll be glad once you're out the other side.

Good Luck and Stay Strong

SoulFull wrote:Hi everyone!

7 months off weed
8 months off cigarettes

Another month and I'll match my previous record being weed free for 8 months. Plus this is the longest time I've ever been ciggarette free. I've also quit coffee for about a month now. I felt the withdrawal symptoms for coffee as well, and I remember someone mentioning his/her mom quitting coffee and ended up being glued to the couch all day long. Yup, I felt like that for about a week. I'm back to normal now.

What is normal? For me the definition of normal has changed. A 180 flip in these couple of months from a two decade period of abuse. I'm in real good health now as I treat my body better. I exchanged smokes for family BBQs by the beach. I exchanged junk food munchies full of sugar/salt/junk for healthy home cooked meals.

I met my 2nd cousin during my sister's enggagement a year after she decided to make a change in her life. She lost 37 kgs after taking care of what she eats, exercising and intermittent fasting. Her skin was glowing and she looked fit. She stopped smoking as well. We used to smoke a blunt or two in the car on the way to sushi joints where we would splurge on sushi to the point reaching unconsciousness. She was so heavy back then, that her knees couldn't take the weight and needed crutches. That too wasn't enough, I had to support her to our car parked outside the shop. And then we would smoke again while I drive her home. It was like our little ritual. This was our NORMAL back then.

After nearly a year not seeing eachother, we noticed and mentioned how well we both looked. Although my concern was not towards losing weight, I couldn't resist asking her what she did to look this fit. She drinks 3 litres of water everyday, does not take sugar at all, eats lots of fruits and veges and cooks her own meals with olive oil and natural salts, roasted or boiled. The withdrawals to "normal" food were there but they're no harder than the ones felt when quitting nicotine/weed. She snacked on veges with a side of no fat yoghurt with minced parsley. This is her NORMAL now. She can no longer eat fast food (our ex-NORMAL) as she says that she'd feel nauseous just looking at them now.

I've been cooking a lot these days. Now I just cook on the weekends, and pack them in freezer plastic packs so that me and my family will have a week's supply of healthy home cooked meals that only need to be heated up, to be ready to eat.

To me, all these changes are amazing. Time off substances which are actually quick fixes to feeling good, will eventually lead to other approaches to feeling good. In this case, cooking your own nutritious food. I didn't plan this, nor did my cousin. It just happened. Give it time, remain quit, and your body will naturally seek out good stuff as an alternative and will eventually leave out the bad.

I feel great. Everyone can do this. It's just a process of replacing old habits with new ones. Endure a bit more.

P/s: My wife lost 2.5 kgs after just 2 weeks.


Soberchic wrote:Wow cant believe its almost i more anxiety, paranoia, constantly feeling like i have flu symptoms, and chronic fatigue..i still know there are long-term improvements that will reveal. My personality is different now, i can see that i want to be around people more and not be in isolation. I can actually save money and i jist bought a car and gave my sister my old one. Im not just satisfied anymore i am deeply content and happy. I just realized that smoking weed i was substituting from opiate and alcohol addiction. It has been a ride and im out of the storms grasp. 18 yrs of smoking daily and i finally made it way past 2 months quit..
I also enjoy work now more than ever. In the past month i can feel my passion for life in all aspects coming to the surface. I thank everyone on this site for posting there stories. In the beginning i would be on here 3 or 4 times a day just to get some relief..keep on keeping clean yall
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