Should I cut contact again?

Postby bunnyrabbit » Sat Apr 21, 2018 8:26 pm

So I’ve recently got back into contact with a friend who I distanced myself from for a while. I distanced myself because I believed the friendship was bringing me no benefit and was messing with my mental health for quite complicated reasons, including me having an unrequited crush on one of our mutual friends. My mum said I was in a ‘shocking state’ around that time.

I never really called her out on the things she did (she would pressure me to learn how to drive and make me feel bad that I don’t know what I want to do in the future, as well and exclude me from plans and belittle me infront of others). I still feel this resentment towards her even if all this stuff is in the past (2016).

I’m considering cutting her off again just to rid myself of the resentment but I feel mean doing that because maybe she has changed. Then again I kinda believe a leopard never changes its spots. Thoughts?
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#1

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Sat Apr 21, 2018 9:40 pm

bunnyrabbit wrote: Then again I kinda believe a leopard never changes its spots. Thoughts?


Have you changed your spots?
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#2

Postby bunnyrabbit » Sat Apr 21, 2018 9:41 pm

Richard@DecisionSkills wrote:
bunnyrabbit wrote: Then again I kinda believe a leopard never changes its spots. Thoughts?


Have you changed your spots?

Not completely.
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#3

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Sat Apr 21, 2018 9:44 pm

The decision of what you should do is based on how you have grown or changed in life. Are you not more resilient, more accepting, more capable than the 2016 version of you?
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#4

Postby bunnyrabbit » Sat Apr 21, 2018 9:50 pm

Richard@DecisionSkills wrote:The decision of what you should do is based on how you have grown or changed in life. Are you not more resilient, more accepting, more capable than the 2016 version of you?

Yes, I believe I have improved since 2016. What I’m taking from this is that cutting her out is the best option.
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#5

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Sat Apr 21, 2018 10:02 pm

bunnyrabbit wrote: What I’m taking from this is that cutting her out is the best option.


Okay. If that is what you take from it.

Make the decision. Own the decision. There is nothing wrong with ending a bad relationship. It will probably do both of you a favor.
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