6 months weed free - PAWS

Postby thegreatdane » Mon Jul 23, 2018 4:50 pm

Hey guys.
Im a currently 6 months free from weed. I decided to quit because i was very addicted to it and it affected my life and personality a lot. It got to the point where i was only "myself" when i was high. When the weed wore off i became extremely socially anxious, socially awkward, depressed, and unmotivated. I started smoking when i was 16 and stopped when i was 20 years old.

So now i have been 6 months sober and to be honest i feel lost. I felt horrible in the first months with insane anxiety and depression. Then i actually had a week or two where i was starting to feel a lot better, but that didnt last long. Since then i have had no "good days". I have just had horrible days and normal days. On the normal days i still feel social anxiety and fatigue. Im starting to think things will never get any better and i really need some hope. I feel like my personality is gone, my sense of humour is gone. I have NO confidence or self esteem. Its like my personal energy vibrance is just gone.
Please someone tell me that this is "normal" and that i will get my confidence and all that back eventually. Is it normal to have no "good days" and just feel kind of "normal" all the time? normal in a bad way. And then sometimes have paws days where i feel really irritated and depressed.
I will do a update when i reach 9 months.

Thanks for reading :)
thegreatdane
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#1

Postby Astro413 » Mon Jul 23, 2018 6:48 pm

Hey man I’m only on week 6 of my quit venture and I know how you feel. Some days are bad and some days are normal. For me a bad day consists of depression, no motivation, anxiety, headaches, etc. all day. And a normal day for me is waking up with anxiety and restlessness that goes away after 2-3 hours and then just kind of being present, no sense of humor, nothing to say, cloudy brain. I know exactly how you feel and so does everyone else on this forum to some extent. I can say that I do see improvement on a weekly basis, I was an every day smoker but I wasn’t smoking copious amounts like some others on this forum. It just takes time man. For me personally my biggest issue is just about anything depression related or really just anything negative in general sends me into a spiral of anxiety and questioning things, even life in general. The thing is you have to stick with it. I for one have never experienced and anxiety/depression in my life and these are very new emotions for me. Honestly up until I quit I didn’t even think they were real. But you have to stick with it or you will never see improvement. I know it’s hard, even now as I’m typing this I can’t seem to get out of my own head and honestly most of my time is spent on this forum reading others successes because it gives me hope. Another thing I would suggest is cbd. Whether you’re vaping it, tincture or however I will say it has helped calm my anxiety down tremendously even if it is temporary. Not saying it’s a cute but it helps for the time being until this all goes away. Stay off the antidepressants because those are addictive in themselves and the whole point of this is to drop our dependencies. I know that sounds a little double standard-ish considering I am using the cbd myself, but multiple studies have found that it actually helps repair the damage thc does to your brain. Not an advocate, just offering some form of relief.
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#2

Postby Astro413 » Mon Jul 23, 2018 6:51 pm

Another thing I would say is hang on to those good days as a form of motivation. While they may come few and far in between the will only get better and better. I myself had two very good days yesterday and the day before despite my morning anxiety but as I mentioned even on bad days I can actually feel it subsiding albeit at a slow pace, but remember that this is a healing PROCESS which will take time, some longer than others but that depends on a wide variety of factors.
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#3

Postby thegreatdane » Mon Jul 23, 2018 7:02 pm

Thank you for your reply, Astro413.
Congratz on 6 weeks, im glad that you are seeing a little bit of improvement.
You're right, i have to look at the good days i had 3-4 months ago and use them as motivation. There is just that fear in my mind saying "what if you will never have these good days again and you will never stabilize and be normal". I will keep going no matter what, i will never go back to smoking weed, it has caused me so much trouble and i am on the road to being the best version of myself.
thegreatdane
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