Day 1

Postby easthelp » Thu Aug 16, 2018 1:52 pm

Weed has basically destroyed my life.
I'm a paranoid, anxiouis wreck of a person who hates being sober, and hates being stoned.
Thankfully I have a good job and an amazing Fiance - I can tell she's getting bored with that 'distant and non-responsive' behavious in the evenings.
I quit before for around 8 months, and slipped up again. I was just getting my sanity back and here I am again - depressed and lethargic with or without weed.
Just need to get over the next 48 hours so I can get my streak back - this feels tougher than the first time round though......
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#1

Postby Astro413 » Thu Aug 16, 2018 3:47 pm

Hey buddy I know how you feel, unlike most on here I didn’t have a 10-20 year weed addiction. I smoked daily for 1.5 years simply because I liked it and like most of my generation believed that there would be no consequences. Tomorrow marks two months for me and while I still fluctuate between bored-anxious/ocd-and depressed throughout the days I have like you will/have seen improvements. Instead of sitting around all day incompasitated I have noticed in this last week or so that I have been ever slightly more lively. Although at that stage where I will avoid plans like the flu (I’m assuming that’s part of the depression) I find it so much easier to distract myself from these symptoms even if only for 15 minutes. The point is to stick with it no matter how hard it gets, and it does get really hard, but if this forum has taught me anything it’s that it does get better and eventually although at different paces we will forget these feelings we have now and be able to carry on with our normal lives. The thing to remember is you have put your body and mind into total shock, your thoughts and patterns aren’t your own and it just takes time to get everything working right.
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#2

Postby easthelp » Thu Aug 16, 2018 5:49 pm

Thanks you are right. It's the emptiness I can't though. A hangover or a comedown is noticeable but I just feel like I'm in a hazy fog at the moment. As you say, it's the shock I keep putting my body and mind through. I'm going to distract myself like you suggested. Hope you're finding some peace in your journey too buddy. Congratulations on 2 months!!
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#3

Postby Cali-Detroit » Fri Aug 17, 2018 5:26 am

Hey you did 8 months, that's huge. You can do it again. It's weird how the weed brain won't let us remember how good we felt, at least in my experience. How long and how often did you smoke for?
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#4

Postby easthelp » Fri Aug 17, 2018 7:18 am

Hey Call, thanks for replying. I smoked from age 15 until 30. I was only then getting my sanity back and thought 'oh well I'm damaged goods. May as well carry on'. Seems like paws can go on for 2 years after quitting. I was a daiky smoker up until about 25 where the depersonalisation got too much and I started toning it down a bit. I'm all or nothing. I cannot moderate so abstinence is the only option really
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#5

Postby Cali-Detroit » Fri Aug 17, 2018 3:34 pm

Yeah man, that's rough. It's easy to think it's too late, might as well keep at it, but I think deep down we know better.

It does seem like a long, long road and thats the hardest thing to face at 4 months for myself. But pushing through and focusing on a day at a time is the only way. So cliche, I know, but it is for a reason.

Good news, you have someone in your life, which many don't. I can't imagine trying this by myself, which is probably why it took me so long.

Hang tough and try to get active. Maybe find something you can both do together and force yourself to do it. Don't get to self absorbed as is easy to day early on. That's how we alienate people. They are your greatest resource ATM

Peace to you and stay up
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