I'm sick and getting older

#30

Postby Candid » Wed Jan 23, 2019 7:49 am

desperate788 wrote:I just want my libido back. I want to travel world with a girl friend.


But first you have to find a girlfriend, and that means putting yourself out there and actually looking for one. Then your libido will no doubt return.

I want to earn my life by art but I'm too old for that.


Nonsense. Less time online and more time actually practising your art is what's called for. Finding and joining other people doing the same art would be a good thing.

I want to move to istanbul see my mother more.


This one's immediately doable. Request a transfer to Istanbul, and if that can't be done, just quit and move. Fortune favours the brave, and all that.

PLAN:
Move to Istanbul
Practise your art
Put yourself among other people
Keep your eyes open for the right girl
AND
Talk to her!

There's no point finding girlfriends and like-minded artists where you are now. First put yourself in the place where you want to live.

What's so difficult about all that? It looks obvious to me.
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#31

Postby desperate788 » Wed Jan 23, 2019 8:13 am

I lack motivation so deeply that I can't do any of these.
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#32

Postby desperate788 » Wed Jan 23, 2019 8:40 am

I hardly go to work with lethargy. I'm in state of heavy anxiety..even hearing people talk about work makes me more anxious. I can't see any positive future in my situation. The simplest things is a struggle for me. Moving seem quite unlikely though I want it.
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#33

Postby desperate788 » Wed Jan 23, 2019 8:46 am

I'm like men sleeping in streets. I somehow maintain a job and have a roof on top.
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#34

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Wed Jan 23, 2019 2:51 pm

Stop feeling sorry for yourself
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#35

Postby desperate788 » Wed Jan 23, 2019 3:06 pm

There are things I made wrong some bad luck youngness and things my father did all together resulted this unfortunate situation of mine today..If I am sorry about it? I don't know
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#36

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Wed Jan 23, 2019 3:32 pm

desperate788 wrote: If I am sorry about it? I don't know


I didn’t say to be sorry. I said stop feeling sorry for yourself. Another way to phrase it is “stop whining” about it.

Your constant whining doesn’t do you any favors. Your constant “woe is me, woe is me” mantra hurts you in a number of ways. First, it reinforces personal negativity. Second, people pick up on it and begin to treat you accordingly.

Think of it this way. You say you want a girlfriend. Do you want a girl that is constantly whining and complaining and sulking about life? No. You want a person that is happy, positive, that adds to your life, not subtracts from it.

In here, Candid, me, and other members don’t really care if you whine about all your extremely insignificant little problems. It is a public forum and you are a friend. But, I won’t believe that you only whine in this forum. What you do in this forum represents how you navigate real life, constantly whining. It is unattractive and unproductive.

Set a goal. Don’t write anything negative in the forum for a month. Don’t complain, don’t whine. Post about the good things you are doing in life.
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#37

Postby desperate788 » Wed Jan 23, 2019 3:46 pm

The only good thing in my life is friends in this forum and my mother. She is with me now.
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#38

Postby desperate788 » Wed Jan 23, 2019 3:49 pm

That's worrying that sucks the positivity out of me.
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#39

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Wed Jan 23, 2019 4:46 pm

Can you not write or post anything negative about your life for one week?
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#40

Postby desperate788 » Wed Jan 23, 2019 4:46 pm

Whenever I try to be positive a worry stuck.
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#41

Postby desperate788 » Wed Jan 23, 2019 4:48 pm

Richard@DecisionSkills wrote:Can you not write or post anything negative about your life for one week?

That depends how you define a negative post it's relative.
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#42

Postby ProvRepublic » Wed Jan 23, 2019 5:13 pm

and you created this thread to regain motivation/look for advices? because it does not look like it
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#43

Postby desperate788 » Wed Jan 23, 2019 5:33 pm

I don't know what I am looking for I'm lost worries dominate my psyche I feel so helpless.
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#44

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Wed Jan 23, 2019 6:13 pm

desperate788 wrote:That depends how you define a negative post it's relative.


Bull$#*t desperate. Don’t BS me and don’t BS yourself. If you want to be a troll, then maybe you are not really a friend. You know damn #$&@ing well when you post something if it is something that is positive about your day or not. So don’t play this relative crap with me.

Post whatever negative crap you wish desperate. Try to play games as an arm chair philosopher. See how it works out for you. Just my opinion, but it looks like your “its relative” BS hasn’t worked out very well for you thus far in life.

Oh...and all the “bad” or “negative” or “horrible” things your father did to you in life...well I guess those things were actually very positive for you, right? I mean, after all, it’s all relative according to you.
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