22 weeks clean (weed & alcohol)

Postby lefttheleaf » Tue Jan 22, 2019 10:44 am

Hi everyone, and especially hi to any one who has followed my journey on here. If you havent and want to get up to date then i have added the link to the my story below - for anyone struggling and thinking that life wont get better its worth reading.

viewtopic.php?t=107574

Today marks 22 weeks clean for me and i am back feeling emotions and feeling a little closer to the person i remember being before i began blocking life and reality out daily - as i now see thats why i used both alcohol (firstly) and then weed (veryyyyyy heavily).

I feel confident enough now to say that i am well on the road of recovery and the last two weeks i have looked forward and not backwards and felt pretty dang good.

I wont be updating too much from here as I am a big believer now that in order to repair and recover we must live life - and not think about it too much.

I would say i am now 60-70% recovered and i can put this down to the following:

Meaningful relationships
Finding or reigniting a passion
Exercise
Meditation

Nothing i have tried or done has helped immediately but the combination of the four above points has, i truly feel, improved my quality of life and helped me get my feet moving towards feeling calmer and happier.

The current symptoms i feel are - occasional fogginess of mind (maybe 3-4 hours a day), on and off DP/DR - this happens daily but I have now just learnt to accept this and let it happen - which ironically helps it pass, on and off anxiety (worse in the AM and upon waking), existential anxiety is quite high but this has always been the case with me and it was one reason i smoked so much - to block it out, and i have random memory pops and regular bouts of OCD type thinking - but again i now realise that this is something i have always had and weed was a way of self medicating.

I know there will be people reading this who are still in the midst of the panic and the fear and i can wholeheartedly appreciate where you are - read my story - it was heavy.

I may update in a month or so's time but i may not as i want to get back to life and living and move past this stage which i can now put down to one of learning and growth.

If you want to hit me up for any advice (i am not sure how much i can offer you as this is YOUR own battle and fight) or have any questions, i will do my upmost to try and help you but please help yourselves and start to exercise, meditate, spend your time doing things that you enjoy and try and connect with people - be that new people online or in the world or reconnect with people who you may have lost touch with - you may need to be a little humble to reconnect with people you may have hurt (this was the case with myself) but it helps and it heals.

Cheers all and try and stick with it - its worth it
lefttheleaf
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#1

Postby tokeless » Tue Jan 22, 2019 7:17 pm

I wont be updating too much from here as I am a big believer now that in order to repair and recover we must live life - and not think about it too much.

Absolutely
tokeless
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