15 months weed free and fine!

Postby Robb1e_g » Wed Feb 20, 2019 4:22 pm

Hey guys, just back to post again for others who are struggling.

I know when I was first struggling I needed someone who had recovered to come back on here and give me some advice.

I’m 1 year and 3 months clean from hellish weed and a terrible lsd trip.

Here’s what I’ve found out about PAWS.

It really is all about your mindset and willingness to push through it. If you keep coming into this forum and over analyzing every thing you feel it’s going to be much harder. Here’s a fact a I have to accept now. PAWS sucked and although I’m out of the woods, there are still some things I’m working on that will take longer to overcome. I now still have anxiety (probably from the both the bad trio and a lot of strong thc oil) and it’s something I have to accept and control. I’m not saying I will have it forever but I do have it now and it sucks sometimes, it usually triggers when I read or here things about bad experiences with drugs or existential questions or when people joke about killing them selves. Because after going through the hell of PAWS its no wonder I’d have anxiety to these sorts of things.

I’ve read some posts of people really struggling with the suicidal thoughts and I understand how you feel, I went through it. Every now and again the thoughts will pop back up but now I think I can’t believe I actually thought about that. It hurts me inside that I had those feelings and sometimes suffer from them still, I don’t know why. But this is was an awfully hard thing for me to go through and it’s awfully hard for you guys right now. So be kind to yourself, know your worth, and logically understand that you obviously were put on this earth for a reason. It’s ridiculous to say life is meaningless. There’s so much love and purpose for who you are and what you’re meant to accomplish. There’s more to life than what we can see or feel. That’s why you need to trust and push through. Suffering isn’t forever. Sometimes I still have bad thoughts or existential anxiety for whatever reason, but it’s to the point where I can control it now. And I know with more time it will be gone.

Healing takes a very long time. And you need to refocus on the moment and be greateful for now, because tomorrow isn’t garunteed. Even if you feel like sh**, tell yourself “you know what, I’m gonna enjoy the day” even if you don’t. Stop being negative. Stop letting negativity control your day. Neutralize negative thoughts and turn it around, because you can. Time is the only thing that’s going to fully heal you, so get out there and be better than you were yesterday.

The best thing for me was to stop sitting at home and working and go to college and expand my knowledge on religion and and the world and talk to people and get to know more people. And I think I know who I am now, and I barely ever have dr/do anymore, no more depression at all. Just anxiety. But what can I expect after messing my mind up like that.

All I’m trying to say is, it’s okay, and you’re going to be okay. Of course you can’t see it right now while you’re in the woods. It’s dark in there. Just never ever make irrational decisions for temporary problems. Life had problems and struggles and stress. It always does, it always will. But your tolerance for any of that is zero, you have to build it up again one struggle at a time. It’s how you grow. And I know every one of you will do it and will be fine. Trust me. I was in your shoes.

Good luck guys,
Rob
Robb1e_g
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#1

Postby Cthompson21 » Wed Feb 20, 2019 4:45 pm

Hey Rob, good to hear you have a handle on things. I agree and think you will improve further even though you are experiencing some minimal anxiety still. I'm glad to see your post. I agree with everything you are saying. It is so so hard. I've read people on here say giving birth, TBI's and other things are less stressful than PAWS. We are so strong for going through this crap! You are so inspiring and I wish you luck. I am doing somewhat better too at 7 months but I am with you I believe I will always have residual anxiety as well, I was never like this before PAWS. You are amazing and thank you for posting, keep us updated once in a while.
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