9-10 months clean paws

Postby dennisg787 » Fri Apr 05, 2019 1:30 am

hi guys and girls.
i have made a few posts here about my quit journey when i was in a really bad place.
im from greece 31y/o male and i was a smoker for 12 years but for 8 of those 12 years i was smoking natural weed grow under the sun and it was not that strong but the last four years me and my friends had a briliant idea to buy seeds from amsterdam and start to grow indoors.
At the begining everything was amazing,free weed,plenty of free time and we were smoking all day and night.
after 2 years of smoking that sh** i was wondering what kind of life i was living because i was loosing all my interest in things i used to like,like going out,play football,fishing etc but i didnt want to quit even i knew that this kind of weed (skunk)was ruining my life and i continue to smoke like stupid for 2 years more.so last may i was getting paranoid about everything,my highs where very bad and i was starting to feel like i was sick and i decide to quit cold turkey tobacco weed and caffeine.
this is where i thought i was about to die.
after 3 days.....boom.
i didnt even know about withdrawal symptoms so i was scared about my life and starting to panicing.i was googling all day about cannabis withdrawal symptoms and i had everything at the maximum level.after 2 weeks of no sleep no eat and had to work 12 shifts everyday i visit a doctor and told him about it.he said i was stupid to do that cold turkey and he told me to start smoking again only once before go to sleep.
so after work i rolled one small joint to smoke but it was a nightmare.panic attack,iwss shaking like afish out of water i was saying to my girlfriend that im going to die and stuff like that but after all it pass.
so fast forword im about 9-10 months clean.
In the meantime i moved from greece to uk last october to change my life for good.


the first 3 months were hell.my sleep was a mess,anxiety,depression,no feeling at all,very very low energy,brain fog,dr-dp was very strong,i could not even talk to others.
at the and of the 3rd month i finish my job(summer job)and i got a little bit better but still a mess.
now at 9-10 months i have see improvements but not that big.i still have dr-dp, anxiety, brain fog,low energy levels and mild depression but they are manageable.my mood is better my energy levels are not that low but still low anxiety comes in waves,same with depression,brain fog is now manageable and is getting better,short term memory is better,overall im better but i have long road ahead to be "normal" again and i hope one day i would get there cause sometimes i think im going to be like this forever but honestly reading in here your stories make me feel better and not alone in this battle.
i pray for all of us to finaly find peace in here and i hope my next update would be much better and more positive.
sorry for my english
love you all
Dennis
dennisg787
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#1

Postby Brudenski » Fri Apr 05, 2019 7:05 am

Hey man keep going i have the same timeline few days before you and my symptoms are somehow identical to yours. I think that now we should focus on our improvement not when we will return to normal because i think we have made a big improvement but we cannot see it now clearly. And i know it easier said then done but we have to try to shift our focus on positive stuff.
Keep pushing as i will keep pushing too the 1 year is not far we still have 16% of it :D .
And as they say when you reach a goal you have a seretonine release in the brain that will last longer then the weed high.
I will finish by a quote learned from kung fu panda
"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift"
Brudy
Brudenski
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#2

Postby dennisg787 » Fri Apr 05, 2019 1:29 pm

hey brudy thanks for your reply
i have no other option,i have to push forword.
im trying to focus on the positive stuff but some times anxiety gives me bad thoughts and they are awfull but i got used to it now and they dont last that long.
as for the healing time i dont really care how long it is goingto take to be to feel ok and normal cause there is no other option for me as i said.weed is not for me anymore,it wont make me feel better so i have to go through that.
do you have dr/dp all the time?like you are in some kind of video game?
sorry for my english!
lots of love to everyone.
dennisg787
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#3

Postby Brudenski » Fri Apr 05, 2019 1:45 pm

Well Dennis,
Dp/Dr i didn't have it even in the beginning.
I do have huge anxiety and specially phisical anxiety that affect my mood a lot with feeling of nausea and blurry vision with dizziness. I do feel i am trapped in my head but not being in a video game.
And i noticed after 9 months the cycle is repeating himself like the beginning but less intense or maybe because we are used to them.
But i am in the now a lot more than the beginning.
Time is our answer.
Keep pushing Bro
Brudy
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#4

Postby dennisg787 » Fri Apr 05, 2019 3:26 pm

I do have too physical anxiety like weak arms and legs and little shaky,sometimes is low and sometimes is intense and i hope that to go with time cause it really plays with my mood.
i feel like i cant relax.exercise will help but i dont have free time to go to the gym.
i really hope to all of us to get better!
and you too buddy,keep up the good work and we will get there
dennis
dennisg787
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