Moved to a new city, feel really alone

Postby Doragoniru » Sun Sep 08, 2019 3:15 am

Hey, I just moved from India to the Americas and I feel like I'm that one loner everywhere I go.
I used to have several friends in India but as soon as I got here, it's all gone.
I don't know if it's about my dressing sense, which is literally a hoodie and pants or shorts or if it's the way I look with my overly curly hair, or if I'm just being overly paranoid about this stuff. I'm an undergraduate student and was looking to get a real 'life' here.
I feel my self confidence reducing daily and I need some advice on what to do. If I should just forget about it or change something about me.
Heck, people even choose not to sit next to me in public transport even though I'm extremely hygienic and I take showers everyday. My physique isn't perfect but I'm not overweight either, let's call it a little flab, which I am doing my best to work off.
Any feedback is much appreciated and I thank you for reading this.
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Postby Candid » Sun Sep 08, 2019 9:17 am

Doragoniru wrote:I used to have several friends in India but as soon as I got here, it's all gone.


Well yes, that's what happens when you change location. Did you think your Indian friends would be waiting in America to greet you?

I suggest you focus on your studies, be friendly to the people around you and offer help where you can.

Ignore the reactions of people on public transport. Read a book, make notes, look out the window and/or listen to music.

College is, as far as I know, the easiest place to make friends. Tutors love to get people into pairs or small groups for specific projects or discussions. You may find these friendships end after college as you all set off in different career directions, but they'll improve life right now.

Your clothes sound right for student life (ie. whatever feels comfortable) and you aren't physically repellant, so please stop looking for reasons why people aren't approaching you. You can approach them any time you like, knowing that IF they blow your off, it's their problem.

... was looking to get a real 'life' here.


If you didn't have a 'life' there it was probably unrealistic to expect an immediate one 'here'. You sound shy and lacking in self-esteem, things that can be changed with practice. I wish you well.
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