Feeling depressed over other fan's photos

Postby Budgie98 » Sun Dec 15, 2019 9:42 am

Hi, I just needed to vent to someone today. Big thank you to anyone who will read this.

I have been a huge fan of this Norwegian group for the last 4 years. There isn't a day when I wouldn't listen to their songs or watch interviews. I've even been learning Norwegian and subtitling shows they appear on. I've only seen them live once though, when they held their only concert outside Norway. It's my biggest dream at the moment to travel there and meet the members in person. The problem is, Norway is extremely expensive and my only income comes from student part time job in a post-eastern block country. Therefore, I worked almost constantly in the summer so when a concert pops up, I'd be able to travel there with other fans and have the best holiday ever.

Unfortunately, when they actually announced a series of concerts, it was in the middle of the semester - a time when I absolutely cannot leave even for a few days due to work and school. A fellow fan from my country (let's call her Jane), who has been to Norway twice this year already and met the guys several times, announced that she'll be going there 3 more times to see all of the 8 concerts. I don't know where she gets all the money from (one ticket costs approx. my monthly salary) - Jane even has kids and hasn't been able to work for the last few years! She made events on Facebook and invited me to all of them which made me even more sad that I wasn't going. So when the first concert came and my Facebook frontpage was full of her happy photos with the guys, I just couldn't look at it. I cried several times that day, once even in the middle of a mall after I saw another set of photos. She messaged me how amazing the concerts were and how she chatted with the band members for half an hour every night, and how she wants more pictures because she's "such a huge fan". It was a stressfull time for me overall, because as I anticipated, the combination of school and work was a lot. And still I felt like I was being too responsible. Maybe I should have skipped classes, pull the money out of my pocket and fly there just for a one evening.

Now another series of concerts passed and Jane is once again posting pictures where she's hugging them and kissing them and it's making me feel so depressed. The thing is - I don't only feel bad for not being there, but also for being so envious of her. She survived a bad case of cancer that will most likely come back at some point. Everyone around her is so supportive and I'm here feeling like crap every time I see her fulfilling her dreams. I was never like this with other fans who met them 1000 times, but knowing her personally somehow made it hurt.
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#1

Postby Candid » Sun Dec 15, 2019 10:27 am

If this group is doing well, which it seems they are, they don't need anyone to subtitle their videos. There are plenty of people who aren't new to the language who could do that if the band members thought it necessary.

I'm sorry you feel so envious of 'Jane', and I'm sure you realise it's none of your business where her money comes from or how she spends it. She's been through a rough time and she's making up for it. The day may come when she regrets throwing money away in such a frivolous fashion, but we needn't concern ourselves about that. Her life is different to yours. Everyone gets their share of good and bad fortune.

Focus on your study, dear one. Music groups come and go, but qualifications gained now will stand you in good stead forever.
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