I have never been so lost. :(

Postby spod24 » Mon Feb 24, 2020 9:21 am

Today is 84 days no weed
i'm stuck. days blend together. Everything is all the same and it seems to go nowhere.
The first month of quitting was great. I could see improvement day by day, and so could the people around me. Anxiety diminished after a month or 2 into quitting. with no more anxiety i could engage more socially and it felt great. I have always lived somewhat healthy but after quitting weed, health has been my nr. 1 priority. Healthy balanced meal and exercising everyday.

I have taken a break from studying and have moved home to my father in the countryside. The silence and the nature is a godsend. I have had the strangest symptoms the last few months. luckily most of these symptoms, like tinnitus, depression, pounding heart, agitation, feeling cold, muscle pain and so many others i have forgotten, have subsided. I still deal with extreme fatigue. everything is a chore and it seems to get harder day by day to do what is necessary to feel somewhat content. The symptoms that remains are debilitating and has made me quit 2 jobs after a few days of torture and agony. Besides the fatigue, my sleep quality is sh**. Vivid dreams every night which is close to giving me a breakdown every morning. Any kind of light hurts my eyes and i experience vision floaters/static whenever i'm exposed to light. I have tried working at night but it is impossible for me to sleep during the day. while exhausted my mind is still racing in a loop, thinking what can i do different so i can start providing for myself again. I am 24 years old, living with my father with no income...

i read on this forum that recovery can take up to 2 years which for me sounds ludacris (why is smoking weed now legal and acceptable??)

I am stuck. And my family and friends are getting inpatient. Sorry for the long post, but i just wanted to know if what i am experiencing is normal, and i guess i just want someone who has come through to the other side to tell me everything is fine and will be okay. Any wisdom would be highly appreciated
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#1

Postby Cthompson21 » Mon Feb 24, 2020 1:57 pm

Hi, I'm sorry for what you're going through, but you've come to the right place. I can tell you it is the worst in the beginning, aka the first 6 or so months. Yes it could take up to two years though it varies person to person, so you have to be patient. weed is terrible and damages the brain receptors and the brain has to heal. It is essentially an acquired brain injury, in this case known as PAWS. If I knew then what I knew now I would've never done it, neither would anyone going through these symptoms, but we cant change the past. The only way to deal with our situation is to move forward and live. It is so hard at first, but slowly you adapt. If you read over stories on here you'll find lots of good advice like exercise, find a hobby to distract yourself, good diet, fish oil, no caffeine, etc, but what ultimately helps is time. Time and patience are the great warriors in this battle! And know you are stronger than you think and will get better. You can look at my threads and see it was worse in the beginning (I didnt think I would make it, it was so bad) and I still have bad days but it has improved dramatically. It will for you too! As for your family and friends getting impatient, i know it is tough, but ignore them. You have to be selfish in this battle, take time for you and find people that you can be honest with and who will understand what youre going through---get a support system in place. For me that has been certain friends, who have helped me and supported me, and my partner. The rest of the world doesnt need to know and it wont be productive to worry about what they say or think. Dont be afraid to reach out for support on here , it helped me a lot and still does. Good luck and all the best!
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#2

Postby imondayXX » Wed Feb 26, 2020 2:48 pm

84 days still pretty early. Most people are healed within the 6-8 months range. It took a full 8 months for me. The 6-8 month range will feel better than the 3-6 month range. You're just finishing the 1-3 month range if that gives you perspective. Yes, some people can take the full two years but in my experience and research on this forum it's 6-8 months for most people. Keep your head up, I know it feels like it will never end, but it will. Every relapse will reset your brain and set you back, stay strong.
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#3

Postby uniqueason » Sat Feb 29, 2020 5:14 am

what was ur symptome like if you dont mind monday im 128 day now still have issue but definitly less worst than the first 90/day
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#4

Postby imondayXX » Sun Mar 01, 2020 5:59 am

Hey @uniqueson, that puts you at just over 4 months. Nice work getting that far! I'd say my symptoms from 3-6 months were waves of paws of 3-4 days long at a time. My advice is to learn to just give in to it, there is nothing you can do except the basics of exercise and eating well. At 8 months I had quit caffeine and that was the clincher to not having paws waves for me. My paws waves consisted of mostly just fatigue and not wanting to much at all with minor depression.

Keep it up, the 6-8 months period is the most exciting as things should clear up fully by then.
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#5

Postby uniqueason » Sun Mar 01, 2020 6:35 pm

thanks i monday thanks alfo for stayinhg on the forum helping the other with your experience really appreciated brother stay strong i got a big fear of becoming mentally ill but since around 110 day dont think about it that much
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#6

Postby imondayXX » Sun Mar 01, 2020 9:00 pm

thank you for saying so @uniqueason. This was a great resource for me so I think it's important to pay it forward. As per becoming mentally ill, paws will make you think and feel a lot of crazy things. It seemed like my braind was doing everything in its power to get me to smoke again. You're over half way there, keep me posted.
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