Maybe someone can relate?

#75

Postby TMT » Mon May 04, 2020 10:17 am

"Whatever symptoms you have experienced the causes are more likely related to fear and anxiety induced stress. Your issues are primarily psychological". Nice response Richard, it seems my counsel has worked on a bit : :wink: your remedial recommendations please.
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#76

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Wed May 06, 2020 7:19 am

TMT wrote: your remedial recommendations please.


Hello TMT, apologies for the delay. Sometimes life takes priority over hobbies.

For an issue that is primarily psychological, I recommend psychological remediation. I think we agree here.

Where I believe we disagree is what form is most helpful and/or what forms are not helpful or even counterproductive. I think that you see my advice as the latter, whereas I see it the opposite.
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#77

Postby TMT » Wed May 06, 2020 8:30 am

"Hello TMT, apologies for the delay. Sometimes life takes priority over hobbies" no worries, same here.
"where I believe we disagree is what form is most helpful and/or what forms are not helpful or even counterproductive. I think that you see my advice as the latter, whereas I see it the opposite". Kind of confused with this but don't bother if only you could give some self help psychological guides or refer some sites that could be helpful, really appreciate. Sincerely some or i can't afford a psychologist or the time for one, especially during this covid lockdown.
Though I'm out of the doldrums and now have extended good periods and shorter bad days, I would welcome any improvement or understanding about the condition, Thanks.
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#78

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Wed May 06, 2020 9:23 am

TMT wrote:Though I'm out of the doldrums and now have extended good periods and shorter bad days, I would welcome any improvement or understanding about the condition


"The condition" and how you and others wish to attribute the doldrums to "the condition" is the issue. If you want links, look back a few posts. Candid posted an entire page of resources.
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#79

Postby TMT » Wed May 06, 2020 9:55 am

Ok agreed, there is no condition, but there are helpful, not helpful and counter productive ways to deal with it. I know how miserable it was when it started, I've come this far through self help: the not helpful and counter productive I presume.
Elaborate on the helpful so that one may gain from your insight if it pleases you.
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#80

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Wed May 06, 2020 11:51 am

TMT wrote: I've come this far through self help: the not helpful and counter productive I presume.


How far might you have come had you chosen a different path? Can you imagine a darker path, one where you had not come as far? I'm sure that you can.

But what about a 3rd path? Can you imagine a path that would have been more productive than the one you chose? Can you imagine a path where your progress wasn't stifled by the "support" you have received?

The 3rd path is more difficult to imagine. It is not impossible to imagine, but it requires explaining away all the reasons that you didn't take that path. That can be uncomfortable, especially when there are people like tokeless or other members offering alternatives.

A simple question to reflect upon, how many people have you ever told them that what they were describing was not PAWS? I will guess that the answer, if any, is around one, maybe two. I bet that what you consider to be helpful and productive is to accept every claim of PAWS as valid. How many people that were not suffering from PAWS did you willingly accept into the PAWS family without so much as a hint of skepticism?

In my opinion an alternate path, a 3rd path that is more productive is the path that tokeless and many others have traveled.
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#81

Postby Candid » Wed May 06, 2020 11:52 am

TMT wrote:there is no condition, but there are helpful, not helpful and counter productive ways to deal with it.


How could there be three ways of dealing with a non-existent condition??

HELPFUL: Look at posts by tokeless. His chief message is "just get on with life as a non-smoker"—and he's actually done it.

NOT HELPFUL/COUNTER-PRODUCTIVE: Look for 'symptoms', count the days since you quit, keep online journals about your abstinence, hang out with other former tokers, get angry with never-addicted people making suggestions, anguish over the fact that you're no longer the person you were before you started (no matter how long ago that was), use self-hypnosis to convince yourself you've done permanent mental and/or physical harm...
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