Help

Postby Hankjohnson321 » Sun Jul 26, 2020 9:17 pm

I am emotionally detached I have been distancing myself further away from others more and more for almost a decade at this point I'm considering cutting all ties with people who think they're my friends and family but I feel nothing for and that concerns me. I dont date and remain celibate because I'm afraid that I cant give someone what they deserve or my idealistic view of what they would deserve in a relationship. I have very low self-esteem because I hold myself to the highest standards imaginable.i feel that I have a good handle on what is going on with me, but I either dont know how or dont have the will to do anything about it any suggestions are appreciated.
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#1

Postby Candid » Mon Jul 27, 2020 7:43 am

You say you're inclined to end relationships with friends and family. What's stopping you?

I'm not clear on the problem here, what it is you "dont have the will to do anything about". More information, please!
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#2

Postby davidbanner99@ » Thu Aug 27, 2020 7:55 pm

Hankjohnson321 wrote:I am emotionally detached I have been distancing myself further away from others more and more for almost a decade at this point I'm considering cutting all ties with people who think they're my friends and family but I feel nothing for and that concerns me. I dont date and remain celibate because I'm afraid that I cant give someone what they deserve or my idealistic view of what they would deserve in a relationship. I have very low self-esteem because I hold myself to the highest standards imaginable.i feel that I have a good handle on what is going on with me, but I either dont know how or dont have the will to do anything about it any suggestions are appreciated.

Sounds like the "cut-off" is emotional. That is, possibly you're not connecting with people at the emotional level and that creates isolation. I came to see emotional communication is huge in importance (unfortunately). How is your emotional reaction? Do you smile when others make jokes and do you feel tuned into their mentality? Or do you feel sort of alienated and not knowing how to engage? Personally, I do not. Emotional intelligence is very low in my case but it took me years to figure out exactly what takes place during social interaction. Such as eye expression, facial expression and how easily people can smile.
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#3

Postby davidbanner99@ » Thu Aug 27, 2020 8:07 pm

I don't date either but gradually found I'm able to communicate better with females. I lost all that pressure of having to play a role or follow the prescribed pattern. The reason so many people can get very depressed is because there's that pressure to be successful along certain social lines. In my view it's OK to have flaws and not be perfect but self acceptance is a big step forwards.
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#4

Postby pn-mkh » Tue Dec 01, 2020 7:35 pm

Many people equate self-esteem with self-confidence! If the two have different meanings. If we want to enjoy self-esteem in a desirable way, we must know it well.
Self-Esteem is the amount of value we value for ourselves. As you know, human beings in general have a very high value and dignity and have the power to grow to the highest material and spiritual levels. Being aware of this issue can cause a person to know his dignity and not harm his own soul and psyche with wrong thoughts and actions. The very important point is that this idea must be close to the truth and not give way to false pride!

Distinctive characteristics of people who lack self-esteem
Anyone can tell better than anyone else if they have this trait. The most important and obvious characteristics of people without self-esteem can be mentioned as follows:

They see themselves as less and weaker than others.
They have no particular value or prejudice for their beliefs.
They consider themselves the main cause of all problems.
They have little self-confidence.
They are usually depressed or sad.
They do not have significant success in life.
And …

A clear example
Consider someone who intends to propose to the opposite sex. If he dares to say so, he can be said to have good self-confidence. Assuming that person can make his request and hear a negative answer! There will be two different modes:

Case 1: If this person has good self-esteem, he will deal with this issue logically. The following may be the main reason for the negative answer:

The person in question may be interested in and in touch with another person.
She may not be ready for marriage.
The marriage proposal may not have been made in the right circumstances.
The negative response may have been due to momentary excitement.
And dozens more…

Case 2: If this person does not have good self-esteem, he will deal with this issue irrationally. The following may be the main reason for the negative answer:

I am very ugly and I do not look good!
I am not at his level and that is why he answered me negatively.
I always fail.
I have flaws that everyone knows.
And dozens more…

Note that the person you are proposing to may even say no because he or she does not like your appearance! But that does not mean that every person will respond negatively to you, and that one person's beauty standards may differ from one person to another. If with a negative answer and without considering the different circumstances, you came to the conclusion that the problem is you, we must say that it is really your problem because your self-esteem level is low. It is interesting to know that even the most beautiful and handsome people are very likely to fail if they do not believe in themselves at the time of proposing marriage! To solve this problem, you need to raise your self-esteem, which is actually a kind of realism.

How to increase your self-esteem?
To do this, you must first be realistic. Be aware of the truths of your existence and believe in them. You also need to acquire the necessary skills. Due to the fact that mental and psychological problems, which include low self-esteem, have been formed in your body after years of ups and downs, it cannot be changed in one day. Because acquiring all the skills requires practice and repetition.

Strategies to raise self-esteem
It should be noted that it is very difficult to increase this capability individually without consulting a psychologist. Therefore, it is recommended to refer to a psychologist for this purpose, so that you can achieve a desirable level of self-esteem by using principled and scientific methods.

If you want to psychological counseling services Ms. Dr. Leila Jebeli, you can send an e-mail to info@drjebeli .
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