Strange reoccurring reactions

#15

Postby RacerX » Sun Nov 22, 2020 7:03 pm

That is good advice. I appreciate your perspective. I love my lil sis and want to see her healthy and happy. Both in mind and body.
When these events occur I find them disturbing and surreal. They move beyond interpretation and perspective and into delusion.

My interest (other then love of my sibling and concern for her mental health) is of a curiosity and desirer to understand what is it that’s happening to an otherwise extremely perceptive and competent individual.
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#16

Postby Candid » Mon Nov 23, 2020 11:13 am

RacerX wrote:It seemed a good time to bring up my concerns but I was wrong. She wasn’t very receptive

I wonder how receptive you would be to someone saying they didn't agree with you, therefore you were probably not sane?
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#17

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Mon Nov 23, 2020 1:40 pm

RacerX wrote:My interest (other then love of my sibling and concern for her mental health) is of a curiosity and desirer to understand what is it that’s happening to an otherwise extremely perceptive and competent individual.


This is understandable and very common in the forum. For example, people are often lacking in curiosity and desire to understand depression/suicide until a loved one starts down that path. Then, understandably, they begin searching for information, advice, etc. But, out of curiosity? No...that is well-intentioned rubbish. It is well-intentioned, as the person tries to convince themselves that a side hobby is just to better understand depression/suicide. It is rubbish, because as a family member you have the sibling as the case study. Every piece of information is evaluated against this case, determining if it might help the depression/suicide of the sibling.

And this, in my opinion, is where family members often err. Well-intentioned, they try to play the role of therapist, rather than the role of family member. They try to wear both hats. They see the mental health of the other family member and they find it difficult not to try and solve the issue. It isn't a criticism of your specific situation. It is very normal.

Right or wrong, I try to encourage family members to avoid putting on the hat of therapist or problem solver. I think it is more helpful to focus inward on your own role as sibling, which includes gaining understanding of the problem, but then to be supportive, accepting, and "nudge" as appropriate.
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