7 Months PAWS

Postby Shaysmadness » Wed Dec 09, 2020 1:46 am

Back story

I was 24 years old (now 25). I had tried to stop weed countless different times. But since all of my closest friends either smoked, drank or did other drugs I did not know any other way to live. I started to smoke daily around the age of 16, and i experimented with other drugs ocasionaly when i was a little older such as shrooms, lsd, cocaine, speed, mdma.
Furthermore I was a functional pothead through the ages of 16-21 after that my mental health and social life started to take a toll. I was an anxious mess I had trouble holding a conversation. My brains processing speed started to take a hit, and I lost interest in pretty much anything that did not have to do with getting high and playing video games. I became severely detatched form myself and other people so I decided to quit.

Month 0-2

I could not speak nor communicate with others without sounding like i was 7 years old. The brain fog was so debilitating that i avoided people the best i could since i didn't want anybody to see me in the shape I was in. I felt like an emotionless fiend, so out of touch with everything and everyone. Even though i felt horrible i had a certain level of drive and motivation that got me through this phase as i looked at this journey like a challenge that would toughen me up along the way.
I had trouble breathing and heart palpation issues so I started running and weightlifting.

Month 2-3

I no longer experienced nightsweats or insomnia. Heart palpitations persisted. I still had a great deal of brain fog. Anxiety and depression also started to cloud my thinking. I could not control my emotions and i felt completely out of whack with myself even though that was nothing new.

Month 3-6

I started to become suicidal. I often wondered how would i take my own life if it were to come to that. I faced my demons around this stage of my recovery. It was one of the most painful things I have gone through. I felt grief, envy, self pity all at once on a daily basis with a few days off inbetween each episode. I was coming to terms with reality and past trauma. All the emotions i had ran away from by being high finally got a hold of me and beat me down.

Month 6-7

Im begining to have better days. I feel much more hopeful than I did earlier on. Im starting to become more grateful, and I've been able to let go of a lot of resentment and guilt that i battled with.
I still have a good amount of brain fog and social anxiety and I'm worried that my memory and brain processing speed will not recover even though they have improved to an extent I still have trouble communicating with people; thinking quickly on my feet, and finding the right words to say.

Does anyone have any advice regarding my recovery?
Has anyone noticed their cognitive abilities improve after a certain length of time to a greater extent?

Im seeing a psychiatrist in a couple of weeks to see if I have ADD as my father and a few of my past teachers have suggested it.
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Postby bawdyheated » Wed Dec 09, 2020 5:14 am

Get well soon and try to stay optimistic!
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Postby tokes » Fri Dec 11, 2020 10:56 pm

Me clean 2.9 years

Things that helped me:

- heavy weights at the gym (upper/lower split program)
- 1-2 protein shakes a day
- creatine powder 6 week on 2wk off
- high protein low carb breakfast (suitable for anxiety sufferers)
- multi-vitamin tablets
- dissolve in water Vitamin C tablets
- omega 3 fish oil capsule
- once a week football (sport of your choice)
- gaming
- vaping CBD oil
- boxing or BJJ
- Jordan Peterson lectures on YouTube
- meditation
- getting a girlfriend
- self care e.g getting a haircut buying a nice jacket

A lot of these will speed up your recovery or at least mask the intensity of your symptoms. There is something about getting the blood going and pumping healthy doses of testerone into your body that kick starts your body's recovery process. I found when I stop these things, the worse I get. All these things are aimed at building confidence and defeating the monster. Fish oils good for brain function. Vit C essential for keeping healthy. Creatine gives energy for workouts and muscle recovery. Jordan Peterson lectures good for sorting out and ordering your life + putting into context psychological issues you may be having. Each of the list has its own purpose.

Good luck and strength on your journey.

Edit: brain fog gone. Reaction time perfect. However social reaction time still too slow for my liking but can feel it still improving. Was always quick witted but only momentary glimpses of that exist today. But nothing in life is free must work to get it back which I'm confident give another year it will be.
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Postby Shaysmadness » Sat Dec 12, 2020 10:21 pm


Alright. Im gonna try and stay more consistent with working out since I have also noticed its positive effects on my mood and mental clarity. Thanks for the reply!
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Postby Prycejosh1987 » Sun Dec 13, 2020 5:30 pm

The more you resist the more able you will be to resist in future.
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