boyfriend feel humiliated coz of me I have been too far?

Postby chocolatelover49 » Wed Jan 20, 2021 9:09 am

Hi my name is Annabelle

At first I need to apologize for that terrible english but, as u did guess, it's not my native language.

So Im a beautician and my boyfriend, for 3 years now, just become policeman. All is great but with the job, daily things to do, my yoga… I struggle to get some time with him To fix that, we did decide to make some sport together. Few month before the pandemy… What was the more complicated was to find a sport that can fit for both of us. I wanted salsa but he refuses, he wants tennis but i hate racket sport… So finally after hours of search and discussion he proposed me judo. I first refuse it but because I see we were blocked I said ok let’s try it…

Finally, after a dozeon of lessons, we both had fun going there. I had the feeling to improve and feel really good practicing. We were on the same club, same training but we had our partner for the “fight part” in the end of the lesson. With the covid, we can’t go anymore, so a few days ago, he asked me to practice at home. Sure why not? We used a mat for safety and worked on the moves as in training. After one hour he challenged me in a friendly match, like for the normal session “if I dare” and he’ll show me “who’s the boss, it’s not like polish nails or yoga things…”, "let's fight fatty". Im a bit overweight (1m72 for 80kg of full love) but it has never be a problem for me, i accept me as I am and im ok for gentle teasing. I do it too for policemen..

We hang each other kimono and turn around. I quickly noticed the previous exercices tired him more than me. I pull his sleeve, to the left, to the right, I straighten my leg out and fall on him to the ground. He struggle to escape but I hold his wrists, i pin him and count to 10 (we need to pin the opponent 10 sec to win). I gently tease him "ow your fatty got you badly babe" but it didnt make it smile...

I help him to get up and we prepare for 2nd round."Let's go big boy show me what u got!" Now he seems really focus. I can't stop giggling while he seems really serious. He tried to crotch my leg but I counter him, he fall and so I lie on his back. I catch one his arm and bend it on his back. I can't stop my laugh and I tease him "you are under arrest young male for lack of respect to elders" ( I am 29 and he is 25 so Im his "old wife") then I lower his kimono pant and start to spank him while laughing like a whale.

I get up and can't stop giggling. I prepare for another round telling him "ready for another spank babe?" But he was mad saying "no no stop that" and leave the room.

Well it seems silly for me at first but atmosphere is now so cold. He just ignore me, dont talk and isolate himself for 3 days now... I tried to talk him but he instantly get mad and leave the room... I asked him if it's because judo is said no and anyway that sport is sh*t and he doesnt want to do it anymore....

I think i've been too far on my teasing but during the action I just find it funny and I didn't exept at all it could have hurt his ego... I regret so much that he can feel humiliate and hurt because of me

Any ideas on how I can deal with that?
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Postby tokeless » Wed Jan 20, 2021 9:29 am

He's ego bruised and is sulking. I would leave a little note for him to read when he's on his own that just says I'm sorry if I upset you or hurt your feelings. When he's read it and hopefully calmed down, you can discuss the boundaries you have about teasing and how he has tried to tease you or name call and that you don't react as he did. Bottom line is let him deal with it because it's his issue, not yours.
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