7.5 months now

#30

Postby 9monthquit » Tue Apr 27, 2021 7:23 pm

tokeless wrote:. I have PAWS symptoms here and there, but I'm mostly free of them. The only problem is low amounts of stress can trigger them quite easily. It looks to me like you're experiencing the same thing when you socialize, something small (and negative) can trigger your PAWS. It's part of recovery for us.

Surely that's more about your psychological state than this PAWS thing? If you believe it is PAWS that is triggered, then you could have them for ever because it can't be you, just the fact you stopped smoking weed. I get it that some will struggle for a while after smoking weed and it's different for everyone, but this syndrome is taking on a life of it's own and many of the posts I read are more self indulgent in content, the telling of my story and my continuing battles etc etc.... I'm not trying to be unkind, but it's an obsession and is responsible for everything, even a knee pain, a cracking joint, EVERYTHING. It feeds anxiety and creates more and more. There surely is a time to just move on? Imagine if you were contemplating a quit and you read some of these posts of 2,3,5, even longer withdrawing and the myriad of symptoms you WILL get... why quit? Stop feeding the neurosis or it will consume you.


It's absolutely PAWS (at least for me) This sensitivity of stress has become observably lower since my PAWS begun. For many, weed is a way to relax from the stress. When the tool for relaxation is suddenly gone, sensitivity to stress gets high because you know you have to face those emotions. Maybe some people make it an obsession to blame everything on, but I know what my psychological state was prior to smoking weed (I wasn't a very long term user, so I still remember those times well) I am sure that weed is inducing a lot of the psychological problems I have, and even some physical symptoms (stomach issues) Why quit? I'm not sure what you are getting at here. I think a lot of people get these symptoms first, then find this forum which comforts them. As humans we need reassurance that what we're doing / experiencing is normal. The whole reason to quit is to move on to do better things. To have spare time, to work on yourself, to develop new skills and hobbies, or whatever else you want to do with your time. Just not sitting and getting high. You have been on this forum a while, and after reading so many posts, you think people are deciding to quit based on symptoms they will experience? We're all quitting for something greater, and are supporting one another along the way. That's it.
9monthquit
New Member
 
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Mar 16, 2021 4:25 pm
Likes Received: 1


#31

Postby tokeless » Tue Apr 27, 2021 7:38 pm

No problem. It's your journey
tokeless
Senior Member
 
Posts: 2315
Joined: Thu May 08, 2008 5:17 pm
Likes Received: 333

#32

Postby Winzu » Wed Apr 28, 2021 6:27 pm

Yesterday I had a terrible day. I woke up extremely stiff and very stressed out. It felt as if I already was like this during my sleep as well. Working out did not go as usual, I was really tired and so overstressed. All my muscles were tight and my joints were aching.

Unfortunately, I had a party that night. I decided to go but not drink anything. When I arrived there I already felt disconnected, tired and not in the mood at all. I noticed I was very anxious as well, which I am never around my best friends.

As the party goes on many people were joining. At some point the whole house was full. I had fun with my closest friends, was not very anxious anymore but still closed of socially to others.

I decided to enjoy a night once again, I mean I have not been drinking for 9 months now. I planned to drink only 1-2 units of alcohol but quickly I noticed the alcohol started to trigger my PAWS.

At this moment a confrontation happened that triggered my adrenals even more. I became extremely anxious, like crippling anxiety. I felt unheard, uninteresting and weak. I had so much brain fog that every conversation with a fairly unknown person would be intensely difficult to maintain. Until the point I decided to stop speaking and go home after awhile.

The whole night was terrible. I regret drinking and coming to that party. I hate this so much. My PAWS / hang-over (of only 2 drinks) is unfairly harsh right now. It has been an extremely demotivating experience. Is this normal at month 9? Am I looking at a recovery of 2-3 years? I am not sure whether this is PAWS or that I f***ed my life with generalized and social anxiety disorder because of mental/emotional issues.
Winzu
Junior Member
 
Posts: 36
Joined: Wed Mar 10, 2021 6:31 pm
Likes Received: 5

#33

Postby Magicisreal12345 » Thu Apr 29, 2021 7:24 am

I’m just about to be at 9.5 months and I have a very similar experience to you. Reading your story gives me peace we will both heal. There’s times I feel I am healing and times I don’t. We are not even a year sober. I’ve seen the light at the end of the tunnel but it will probably take a while longer. Hang in there
Magicisreal12345
New Member
 
Posts: 10
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2020 7:45 am
Likes Received: 0

#34

Postby Winzu » Thu Apr 29, 2021 12:06 pm

Magicisreal12345 wrote:I’m just about to be at 9.5 months and I have a very similar experience to you. Reading your story gives me peace we will both heal. There’s times I feel I am healing and times I don’t. We are not even a year sober. I’ve seen the light at the end of the tunnel but it will probably take a while longer. Hang in there


It is now 2 days later. I feel a lot better now. It is bizarre how an existential crisis can diminish so fast. I am normally not such an emotional person.

I agree, I have seen light at the end of the tunnel as well. I hope you are right, thanks for the support.
Winzu
Junior Member
 
Posts: 36
Joined: Wed Mar 10, 2021 6:31 pm
Likes Received: 5

#35

Postby Winzu » Thu Apr 29, 2021 6:02 pm

Magicisreal12345 wrote:I’m just about to be at 9.5 months and I have a very similar experience to you. Reading your story gives me peace we will both heal. There’s times I feel I am healing and times I don’t. We are not even a year sober. I’ve seen the light at the end of the tunnel but it will probably take a while longer. Hang in there


Magic, may I ask you. What was your timeline / history of use?
Winzu
Junior Member
 
Posts: 36
Joined: Wed Mar 10, 2021 6:31 pm
Likes Received: 5

#36

Postby 9monthquit » Fri Apr 30, 2021 3:50 am

Winzu wrote:Yesterday I had a terrible day. I woke up extremely stiff and very stressed out. It felt as if I already was like this during my sleep as well. Working out did not go as usual, I was really tired and so overstressed. All my muscles were tight and my joints were aching.

Unfortunately, I had a party that night. I decided to go but not drink anything. When I arrived there I already felt disconnected, tired and not in the mood at all. I noticed I was very anxious as well, which I am never around my best friends.

As the party goes on many people were joining. At some point the whole house was full. I had fun with my closest friends, was not very anxious anymore but still closed of socially to others.

I decided to enjoy a night once again, I mean I have not been drinking for 9 months now. I planned to drink only 1-2 units of alcohol but quickly I noticed the alcohol started to trigger my PAWS.

At this moment a confrontation happened that triggered my adrenals even more. I became extremely anxious, like crippling anxiety. I felt unheard, uninteresting and weak. I had so much brain fog that every conversation with a fairly unknown person would be intensely difficult to maintain. Until the point I decided to stop speaking and go home after awhile.

The whole night was terrible. I regret drinking and coming to that party. I hate this so much. My PAWS / hang-over (of only 2 drinks) is unfairly harsh right now. It has been an extremely demotivating experience. Is this normal at month 9? Am I looking at a recovery of 2-3 years? I am not sure whether this is PAWS or that I f***ed my life with generalized and social anxiety disorder because of mental/emotional issues.


I noticed you are wondering about the 2-3 years suddenly. I hope this is not from my post earlier about it taking up to 2-3 years. I did not mean it as a way to scare / worry you, but to hope that you would allow yourself time to heal, and not give your mind a due date. I have had pretty good mood the last couple days, especially almost no symptoms after running yesterday. This really works for me, I wonder if it will work for you - go run for 20-30 minutes in the sun. It actually does wonders for me every single time. It's like my PAWS vanish for the entire day, and 90% of the next day too.

That said, I think it's totally fine and normal for month 9. I've crossed month 10, and a couple weeks ago I had a terrible wave with a similar existential crisis type feeling that you describe. I hope that helps you feel better about what you went through.

By the way, with feeling horrible in social environments, I think it will pass. I did not have that issue, but I know someone who had longer use than we did, and when he quit, he literally didn't talk when all of us buddies hung out. The guy would give 1 word replies if asked something, and otherwise would just have his hands together in front of him and look down at the floor. Dude became a total zombie. Good news is he became normal with time and is much happier and sociable.
9monthquit
New Member
 
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Mar 16, 2021 4:25 pm
Likes Received: 1

#37

Postby Magicisreal12345 » Fri Apr 30, 2021 12:21 pm

I smoked for 8 years everyday in California. 9 months and 10 days sober now. Every so often I go through a period where I feel I’m out of paws but I get sucked back into obsessing over it. I’ve had a lot of anxiety the past couple weeks mostly due to reading things online. I miss the old days when I didn’t have a computer lol.
Magicisreal12345
New Member
 
Posts: 10
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2020 7:45 am
Likes Received: 0

#38

Postby Winzu » Fri Apr 30, 2021 1:14 pm

9monthquit wrote:
Winzu wrote:Yesterday I had a terrible day. I woke up extremely stiff and very stressed out. It felt as if I already was like this during my sleep as well. Working out did not go as usual, I was really tired and so overstressed. All my muscles were tight and my joints were aching.

Unfortunately, I had a party that night. I decided to go but not drink anything. When I arrived there I already felt disconnected, tired and not in the mood at all. I noticed I was very anxious as well, which I am never around my best friends.

As the party goes on many people were joining. At some point the whole house was full. I had fun with my closest friends, was not very anxious anymore but still closed of socially to others.

I decided to enjoy a night once again, I mean I have not been drinking for 9 months now. I planned to drink only 1-2 units of alcohol but quickly I noticed the alcohol started to trigger my PAWS.

At this moment a confrontation happened that triggered my adrenals even more. I became extremely anxious, like crippling anxiety. I felt unheard, uninteresting and weak. I had so much brain fog that every conversation with a fairly unknown person would be intensely difficult to maintain. Until the point I decided to stop speaking and go home after awhile.

The whole night was terrible. I regret drinking and coming to that party. I hate this so much. My PAWS / hang-over (of only 2 drinks) is unfairly harsh right now. It has been an extremely demotivating experience. Is this normal at month 9? Am I looking at a recovery of 2-3 years? I am not sure whether this is PAWS or that I f***ed my life with generalized and social anxiety disorder because of mental/emotional issues.


I noticed you are wondering about the 2-3 years suddenly. I hope this is not from my post earlier about it taking up to 2-3 years. I did not mean it as a way to scare / worry you, but to hope that you would allow yourself time to heal, and not give your mind a due date. I have had pretty good mood the last couple days, especially almost no symptoms after running yesterday. This really works for me, I wonder if it will work for you - go run for 20-30 minutes in the sun. It actually does wonders for me every single time. It's like my PAWS vanish for the entire day, and 90% of the next day too.

That said, I think it's totally fine and normal for month 9. I've crossed month 10, and a couple weeks ago I had a terrible wave with a similar existential crisis type feeling that you describe. I hope that helps you feel better about what you went through.

By the way, with feeling horrible in social environments, I think it will pass. I did not have that issue, but I know someone who had longer use than we did, and when he quit, he literally didn't talk when all of us buddies hung out. The guy would give 1 word replies if asked something, and otherwise would just have his hands together in front of him and look down at the floor. Dude became a total zombie. Good news is he became normal with time and is much happier and sociable.


Thanks for your reply. From my research I found out that when working out really starts to subside your symptoms the recovery is almost over. I think you are in a good place right now. And the fact that you also experienced an existential crisis in month 9 reassures me.
Winzu
Junior Member
 
Posts: 36
Joined: Wed Mar 10, 2021 6:31 pm
Likes Received: 5

#39

Postby Winzu » Fri Apr 30, 2021 1:16 pm

Magicisreal12345 wrote:I smoked for 8 years everyday in California. 9 months and 10 days sober now. Every so often I go through a period where I feel I’m out of paws but I get sucked back into obsessing over it. I’ve had a lot of anxiety the past couple weeks mostly due to reading things online. I miss the old days when I didn’t have a computer lol.


Alright thanks for your timeline. How long are these good and bad periods for you? I think you are about obsessing over it, as of next month I stop reading about it.
Winzu
Junior Member
 
Posts: 36
Joined: Wed Mar 10, 2021 6:31 pm
Likes Received: 5


Previous

  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Return to Addictions