is it a disorder?

Postby johnmason » Mon Apr 19, 2021 4:44 am

i tend to keep rehearsing/thinking about recent incidents/social interaction in my mind that happened to me..recent incidents related to eg- such as where i had an argument with any person , any embarassing incident where i was ridiculed , social interaction where i said something that i shouldnt have ie. the list goes on..i tend to keep obsessing on it for days and weeks , months. what should i do?
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#1

Postby OptimalHappiness » Mon Apr 19, 2021 6:47 am

Hi John, I don't think this is a disorder, but just your mind is going in circles, whereas you keep replaying old accidents again and again in a loop-type fashion. I can just assume that this type of thinking is not making you happy, nor does it positively affect your self-esteem. Here, you can try to do some self-work or go to a therapist. An example of self-work could be meditation / mindfulness or writing things down. In the second case, you can write whatever thoughts you have, how you feel about them, and what lessons you took out of them. I don't think you have a resolution to these negative events, so you keep obsessing over them. Writing things down will help you find closure, while meditation is helpful overall. Let me know if this helps.
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#2

Postby OptimalHappiness » Mon Apr 19, 2021 7:12 am

Additionally, I thought I'd explain why your mind works in the way you just described it to work. Essentially, you were given a beautiful and powerful brain that can remember the past and try to foresee the future. This brain gave human beings an advantage over other species and eventually lead to the world as you see today. However, this powerful mind can sometimes start working incorrectly, not because it is flawed, but because we misuse it. In your case, you are replaying old situations, evolutionary looking for life lessons which you could take from these situations so they never happen to you before. Its a smart mechanism, but only to the degree that you can use this mechanism efficiently. However, I'd bet that most of your thinking is not very efficient. Being stuck in a loop makes you stuck in the past, which in turn does not allow you to focus on the now. So what if you did something wrong in the past? Past is gone. Focus on whats in front of you. You can control your mind and if this does not serve you, just discard that thought and move forward.
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#3

Postby bawdyheated » Tue Apr 20, 2021 11:26 am

I agree with OptimaHappiness, it is better to focus on the future because you couldn't change the future.
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#4

Postby johnmason » Tue Apr 20, 2021 1:31 pm

thank you for your response.. i believe maybe bcoz of my highly sensitive nature it happens.. i did tried meditation before but it did not work out..maybe i wasnt doing it the right way..i will have to put more effort..
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#5

Postby Alpha90 » Thu Apr 22, 2021 4:09 am

I guess a little more effort wouldn't hurt. Keep trying my friend!
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