Weird addicton at young age

Postby Anonymus » Sat Apr 24, 2021 10:35 am

I'm turning 16 in a few days , and i'm currently very happy with my life. I love my family and my best friends, and i'm finishing school this year. But everytime I remember the weird things I did when I was 9-13 I just wanna travel back in time and change it. I have never talked to anyone about that , but as a kid, I was addicted to watch videos of women giving birth an I have no idea why. I know that i'm straight. I have a crush on a boy from my church and I never would like to be with a girl - But why did I watched this videos ? Its disgusting for me to remember it... And I remember it so often... How can I forget this , and why did I did this? :(
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#1

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Sat Apr 24, 2021 2:09 pm

Anonymus wrote:...as a kid, I was addicted to watch videos of women giving birth an I have no idea why. I know that i'm straight. I have a crush on a boy from my church and I never would like to be with a girl - But why did I watched this videos ? Its disgusting for me to remember it... And I remember it so often... How can I forget this , and why did I did this?


I'm missing something here. What region of the world are you from? How are birthing videos connected to your sexuality? Did you find the birthing videos arousing (sexually)?

Most young teens going through puberty end up finding and/or viewing some form of pornography. Before the Internet it was thumbing through magazines. Now young teens surf the web. Dependent on access/region of the world what types of sexually suggestive material can be found varies.

It sounds like, correct me if I'm wrong, that you came across birthing videos and this was one of your first exposures to sexuality. You may have seen naked people or learned about sexuality at a younger age, but this was pre-pubescent, i.e. prior to increased levels of estrogen being released into your body. When you watched birthing videos, it was at the exact time when you began puberty.
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#2

Postby Anonymus » Sat Apr 24, 2021 2:42 pm

Hello Richard , and thanks for the really! I'm from europe , and I was intrested to this videos but i'm not sexuallity intrested in woman at all. So i'm really wondering why I used to be intrested in this videos... Maybe I just was curious about them... I really cant find out the reason but still just wanna forget what I saw...
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#3

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Sat Apr 24, 2021 3:00 pm

Anonymus wrote:...I was intrested to this videos but i'm not sexuallity intrested in woman at all. So i'm really wondering why I used to be intrested in this videos... Maybe I just was curious about them... I really cant find out the reason but still just wanna forget what I saw...


This does not clear up the confusion.

Where is the sexual connection you are somehow making?

Example: A teen boy says that he was addicted to videos of men being executed. The teenager adds that he is not sexually attracted to men.

What? It's confusing, right? How does sexuality have ANYTHING to do with the videos this boy was watching? Do you see the disconnect? Was the boy getting erections, arousal, was he masturbating to execution videos? Execution videos are not inherently erotic, so why is the boy connecting sexual preference with these videos?

This is where I'm confused with your story. Why are you making a connection between watching videos of birthing with sexuality or sexual preference? Something is missing.
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#4

Postby Anonymus » Sat Apr 24, 2021 3:07 pm

Its embarissing to say this , but while watching this videos I got a little to confortable with my pillow, if you know what I mean. I just don't understand why and I hate that I did this...
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#5

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Sat Apr 24, 2021 3:48 pm

Anonymus wrote:Its embarissing to say this , but while watching this videos I got a little to confortable with my pillow, if you know what I mean. I just don't understand why and I hate that I did this...


Okay...that makes more sense.

Listen, when a child enters puberty it is very natural to get "a little comfortable" with the pillow to a WIDE range of things. During puberty the body is flooded with high levels of estrogen/testosterone. Young teens can become aroused by so many things. There is nothing wrong with it. It's nature.

Instead of trying to shame yourself and forget something that is very natural, use the experience as an opportunity to learn and grow. Use it as an opportunity to learn acceptance not only of yourself, but of others. Use it to laugh at the fact that you are human.
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#6

Postby Anonymus » Sat Apr 24, 2021 3:50 pm

Thank you for the talk! I will see it like that now ! :)
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