Anxiety or what?

Postby Longduckdong » Wed Jul 21, 2021 2:55 pm

I have been struggling a lot with what I believe to be anxiety. Yesterday I went to the bathroom and saw something not normal. I stood up and started getting super dizzy and felt suck the rest of the evening. I have anxiety with my health and just don't know how to function properly without have ridiculous intrusive thoughts or panicking over small issues. I just need some advice on how to deal with it. I use to smoke weed a lot and rarely had anxiety. Since stopping my anxiety has increased 10 fold. I just need some advice on tips and tricks to help me overcome this horrible feeling. I appreciate you all and thanks in advance.
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Postby Arne Pedersen » Tue Aug 03, 2021 9:14 pm

Hi Longduckdoing,

I think that the best way to solve a problem is to do some self investigation to help understand the nature of how it operates. With anxiety it seems to me that it is very connected to feelings, emotions, and thoughts, so lets look at how these work relative to the process of how anxiety happens, so we can then look at a viable solution to support releasing the patterns that hold the anxiety in place.

It seems that when we get overwhelmed by negative, intrusive, judgemental, or self sabotaging thoughts, that our body then starts to feel not good in relation to those thoughts, which supports more negative thoughts that become a circle of overwhelm where there is just too much feeling in our body and negativity in our mind to deal with leaving us feeling helpless and defeated. What if our thoughts were not so brutal on us but supportive instead? and what if we were able to accept, allow and fully experience what we feel in our body? do you think you would feel better as a result of this more positive mind/body loop? I think it is likely you would say yes to that question, so in that assumption lets go a little deeper into what may be causing the negative thoughts and difficult body feelings, and what we could do about changing that. Keep in mind these are just examples, as everybody’s life experiences are different.

Imagine a child feeling something and then expressing the associated emotions/feelings from it, but instead of being met with loving embrace, patience, understanding guidance that feelings were normal and supported/encouraged to allow them as they are as the process moves through its natural course, that this child is instead told: “That's enough with your crying, go to your room!” or their feelings are discounted as not being important as the parent ignores it for the child to work through their emotions it on their own.

Essentially from these kinds of experiences the child will learn that what they feel is bad, or does not matter, and they will forgo their inner voice/guidance to instead practice avoiding what they feel, or avoiding acting their emotions out. Essentially the child learns to discount their feelings, which can become a habit in adulthood where they unconsciously do things to avoid what they feel, or even act in ways to try to get emotional needs met that they don’t know how to get on their own. Of course there are countless examples of how this could happen, but basically when a child is not supported with enough of the patient loving space they needed to become comfortable and confident with what they feel and who they are, then this magnifies into coping/survival belief systems into adult hood that are designed to help protect them from experiencing those kinds of hurts again. These often become self sabotaging behaviours, self judgement, and negative thoughts to keep them small so they don't put themselves out there with too much uncomfortableness, or the opposite of being over achievers always trying to prove their worth, or people pleasers trying to fit in. Either way there will be unconscious behaviours of practicing to NOT be and express who we authentically are in their heart and deeper truth.

The solution is kind of like reversing the problem. If it were true that we now have anxiety as a result of not learning how to be with and accept what we feel and who we were when we were younger, then what would happen if we started practicing to instead be with what we feel, to learn how to accept, allow, and experience what we feel in our body sensations, and to just notice the thoughts that arise through doing this, and to mentor ourself with a loving, patient, accepting voice that it is ok to be ourselves and guide our attention back inwards through following our breathing? In time with doing this we will create a foundational habit of practicing being with the physical sensation of what we feel, which is self acceptance, and from there the charge of energy that we previously did not know how to be with that turned into negative thoughts and anxiety, will in time diminish and let go through the process of a self acceptance practice.

Essentially practice being with what you feel, your breathing and body sensations, on a daily basis. Notice how you get pulled away into thoughts and distracted away from your body. Practice re-orienting your focus back to the feeling sensations in your body every time, which will strengthen the muscles of focus, and create the subconscious habit of re-connecting to yourself in the calm and supportive environment that you are practicing in. This will then support you to more easily center yourself back to a grounded, calm, and empowered state whenever you are triggered with anxiety and remember to do your self-awareness practice in that state. This will strengthen your sense of self, and self confidence will build in your ability to be with whatever you feel in all you do, which will in time support mind/body/spirit alignment of harmony.

Does this help?

If this does resonate with you, I also post other Self-Help videos/articles on my youtube channel that may be helpful:
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Arne Pedersen
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