I think I am depressed

Postby iUsedATempEmail » Wed Nov 03, 2021 4:43 pm

I have a constant sad and low energy feeling throughout the day. It makes my head hurt. In high school other kids would constantly talk sh**, in the 12th grade things had escalated and they would go further. Then I had moved to university. In my mind it was going to be a fresh start which was nice. I was struggling to concentrate in the lectures and I found it hard to complete homework. At the time, I wasn't able to read sentences. Now I am at home not contributing.

I feel so stupid. I'm living all of those days, everyday.
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#1

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Wed Nov 03, 2021 9:05 pm

iUsedATempEmail wrote: Now I am at home not contributing.


Start contributing.

You do not need a university degree to contribute. There are millions of good jobs available. There are hundreds of ways to contribute.
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#2

Postby iUsedATempEmail » Wed Nov 03, 2021 9:54 pm

Hi, yeah in school they had yearly programs informing us how there are many different career paths to take. Something for everyone. That was a two years ago and I'm in my early twenties now.

I don't think I was clear. What I was supposed to say was from the start of high school up until the 12th grade was very difficult and have been very confused.
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#3

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Wed Nov 03, 2021 10:06 pm

iUsedATempEmail wrote: I don't think I was clear. What I was supposed to say was from the start of high school up until the 12th grade was very difficult and have been very confused.


That is the past. How does the past stop you from contributing today?

You can’t apply for a job?
You can’t help around the house?
You can’t volunteer to help in the community?
You can’t go for some exercise?

Whatever happened in high school was years ago.
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#4

Postby iUsedATempEmail » Wed Nov 03, 2021 11:30 pm

I wasn't expecting this but I get it man. You assume that I'm being lazy and I'm making a big deal out of something that happened years ago that isn't relevant anymore. We are in the present not the past. You don't think I know this? I know me better than anyone else like you know you better than anyone else.

I help around the house, exercise and have actually helped my community. I can't help but feel as if you are painting a picture of someone that is just using excuses to get out of doing what everyone else has to do. I applied for university, got into university. That alone was a lot of work. Why would I make something up to get away from all the hard work I put in? Yes you could argue that my actions are not aligned with what I'm saying. It is true.

I don't know how to explain this
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#5

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Thu Nov 04, 2021 12:00 am

iUsedATempEmail wrote:I help around the house, exercise and have actually helped my community. I can't help but feel as if you are painting a picture of someone that is just using excuses to get out of doing what everyone else has to do…


NO!

YOU are the one making comparisons. You are painting the picture. Not me. It’s not a competition between you and anyone else. That is what you are doing.

All I said is that if you feel like your not contributing, then start contributing. And now you say you do contribute. So…what’s the problem?

It is you making comparisons against other people. Why?

I said in my very first response, that you don’t have to go to university. You don’t have to do what everyone else does. I said there are 100’s of ways to contribute.

What…you come from a family of doctors so you must be a doctor? Why? What is wrong with just being a better version of yourself? Why do you give a s@#$ what people in high school are doing or did? Again, it’s not a competition.

The bottom line, stop thinking it is about competing with other people or making comparisons.
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#6

Postby iUsedATempEmail » Thu Nov 04, 2021 12:46 am

That is not true. I know I don't have to go onto higher education... I've have already typed this out. There are lots of different career paths and ways to contribute blah blah blah.

Just because I had mentioned university means that I'm doing it because others expect me to go? The majority of people don't go to university, it is entirely possible to do things without it. My way of contributing is different to yours. YOU have made a wrong assumption about me. I'm doing the complete opposite of what my family has done, I made my own choices.

I made a mistake. You can not help me from reading one thread. You don't know my situation. You don't even know my name
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#7

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Thu Nov 04, 2021 12:50 am

iUsedATempEmail wrote: You don't even know my name


Your name is irrelevant.

And so is what happened in high school. What happened in high school is irrelevant to your contributions.

Also, this is a public forum. So my responses are not just about you. Others can read this thread. While you might not learn anything, that’s okay. Others can use you as an example to improve their own lives.
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#8

Postby iUsedATempEmail » Thu Nov 04, 2021 1:07 am

You can quote my posts and pick things apart however you see fit. That is easy. I hope someone does learn from this post.
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#9

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Thu Nov 04, 2021 1:33 am

iUsedATempEmail wrote:You can quote my posts and pick things apart however you see fit. That is easy. I hope someone does learn from this post.


Yes, maybe we will both learn. Who knows? That is the great thing about a public discussion.

When a person says that they are concerned that they are “Now at home not contributing” it is noteworthy when a few posts later they list various ways that they are contributing. It is that person bull@###&ing themselves.

You either are contributing or you are not. Which is it? I don’t need your name to detect that BS logic.

Again, which is it? Are you contributing or not?

I think you are contributing, but are in the forum whining that your contribution isn’t sufficient. My question, in comparison to whom?

Grow up.

You are young, Now is the time. Stop crying over high school.

If you tell us that you lost your legs and arms in high school so you can’t win an Olympic gold medal…okay…I’m listening. But, if you are saying because kids in high school called you names you can’t X or Y or Z, then tell me how. I’m curious.

If you can explain how, then that starts a discussion. But, you can’t. Instead, all you say is, “You don’t know my name.” Such a weak argument. Do better.
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#10

Postby iUsedATempEmail » Thu Nov 04, 2021 8:02 am

No man, it isn't bs, I'm not whining and I don't always say you don't know my name. You missed the point.

I'm going to find help somewhere else, you make my head hurt
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#11

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Thu Nov 04, 2021 1:08 pm

iUsedATempEmail wrote: You missed the point.


Really? I don’t think so, but If you think the point has been missed, try again. Hiding from whatever the problem really is will not resolve anything.

I'm going to find help somewhere else, you make my head hurt


For all of the advantages of the Internet, the ability to run away is not one of them. Initially it seemed like the Internet was a good thing. It created a safe space, where people could be open about their problems. Unfortunately it also enables people to avoid actually addressing their issues. They simply go answer shopping. If advice doesn’t make them feel good, they don’t need to reflect, address, or clarify the issue like in a normal community.

I understand that you feel bad. But why? The reasons you feel bad don’t make any sense.

You feel bad because you are not contributing? But then you say you are contributing.

You feel bad because of high school? That doesn’t make sense either. High school is in the past.

You feel bad because you don’t feel successful in comparison to others? But you say you understand that you don’t need to compare yourself.
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#12

Postby iUsedATempEmail » Mon Nov 29, 2021 10:53 pm

I don't think you would admit to missing the point. You say I am hiding from something but that is not true. You have gotten the wrong idea.

You came up with a solution to my thread saying that I was comparing myself to others and some other stuff.

That is all rubbish and the method of thinking you have used to come up with your conclusion is wrong
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#13

Postby Richard@DecisionSkills » Mon Nov 29, 2021 11:32 pm

iUsedATempEmail wrote:I don't think you would admit to missing the point. You say I am hiding from something but that is not true. You have gotten the wrong idea.

You came up with a solution to my thread saying that I was comparing myself to others and some other stuff.

That is all rubbish and the method of thinking you have used to come up with your conclusion is wrong


Okay. And?

I’ve been wrong before and I’ll be wrong again. So what? It’s okay to be wrong. It’s okay to fail.

In the mean time, while you are for some reason focused on pointing out how you disagree with me, what has changed? Do you now have a job? Are you contributing? Are you no longer living in your past?
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#14

Postby iUsedATempEmail » Tue Nov 30, 2021 7:59 am

Richard@DecisionSkills wrote:Okay. And?


As said above, so you do not get the wrong idea.

I've decided on going back to university. I weighed up my options and looked at the alternatives routes. I'll be going back. I still feel sh** but I'll feel better doing something
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