I guess I'm addicted to someone!

Postby Lisa! » Mon Dec 21, 2009 4:02 pm

Hi everyone!
I don't know whether I should post this here or in relationship forum so forgive me if I posted it in the wrong forum :oops:

You know there is this guy whom I've met in another forum and I guess I sorta get addicted to talking to him every day. we are just in touch over the net and I'm sure that it will be the same way in the future since once he cleary stated that he's not interested in meeting me in person! You know every night I decide to not spend my time in that forum and do my tasks but then th next morning I go to that forum. I feel so nervous and disappointed and can't concentrates on my sstudies and job when he is not around or when we don't get to talk to each other. He is sorta moody and sometimes cut me dead for no good resean and spend his time talking to other girls or people which drives me nuts! :oops: I know that I'm wasting my time and this relationship has no future since he is younger than me and doesn't care about me that much. My social life sucks since I just keep in touch with afew people when I have to. I guess I can't get a date in real life because noone's gonna ask me out and that maks the situation worse!
So what do you think I should do? I feel so stipud because of my addiction to this person who even doesn't care about me and decrease myself- confidence by his silly jokes about me! :?

Thanks for taking the time to read this :)
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#1

Postby Datura » Mon Dec 21, 2009 11:00 pm

Use some self control and stop communicating with him. When your life outside of the internet begins to suffer, it's time to cut the cord.
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#2

Postby double G » Tue Dec 22, 2009 4:10 am

i feel for you, but in all honestly this is really foolish. You need to hangout with real friends and apply yourself in that area and youll up the odds of doing creating real relationships.

its all about applying yourself
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#3

Postby Lisa! » Tue Dec 22, 2009 7:38 am

Well, thank you guys but you know I already know that it's foolish and I should stop it but I'm asking for help on how I can manage to do it? The fact is that my social life sucks and that's why I'm getting interested in people over the net since we need to communicate with people anyway. My interactions with poeple in real world is a real pain for me sometimes since it usually doesn't do me any good and their behaviors hurt me alot. I have so many friends but they are just busy with their own lives and they just want me when they need me or have nothing better to do. Sometimes they behave as I'm disturbing them. They usually don't call me or reply my eamils when they don't need me. I guess I'm not a very bad person but I don't know why I can hardly find somone who'd lik me. Maybe that's because they think I'm mysterious and don't share everthing of my life with them. But the fact is that my life is really that empty that I almost have nothing to share with them. I'm a good listener and trusty person, but people just want to talk to me and they don't like to hear from me.
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#4

Postby calliope » Tue Dec 22, 2009 7:46 am

Lisa
that sounds really sad. Perhaps you might get involved in some volunteer work and drop the unappreciative friends. You dont need people who dont respect you or respond to you. There must be something you are interested in besides the internet. Do you have any hobbies?

Do you like animals? Volunteer at your local animal shelter
Do you like to cook? Volunteer at your local soup kitchen
Do you love kids? Volunteer at a battered women's shelter

Make your life an interesting place and people will be interested in you.
Other people can't make you interesting, you make you interesting if you are interested in yourself! I know that sounds like a tongue twister, but its true!!

Do you like books? Go hang out in the library
When you do things you find interesting you will find like minded people

good luck and drop the internet relationship
just stop. thats it. go outside and look up
there is alot more to life then some jerk on the internet
Last edited by calliope on Tue Dec 22, 2009 8:01 am, edited 1 time in total.
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#5

Postby Lisa! » Tue Dec 22, 2009 7:57 am

calliope wrote:Lisa
that sounds really sad. Perhaps you might get involved in some volunteer work and drop the unappreciative friends. You dont need people who dont respect you or respond to you. There must be something you are interested in besides the internet. Do you have any hobbies?

Do you like animals? Volunteer at your local animal shelter
Do you like to cook? Volunteer at your local soup kitchen
Do you love kids? Volunteer at a battered women's shelter

Make your life an interesting place and people will be interested in you.
Other people can't make you interesting, you make you interesting if you are interested in yourself! I know that sounds like a tongue twister, but its true!!

Do you like books? Go hang out in the library
When you do things you find interesting you will find like minded people

good luck and drop the internet relationship
just stop. thats it. go outside and look up


Wow! That's great!
Thank you very much for your wise suggestions :)
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#6

Postby Kirstin Asher » Thu Dec 04, 2014 1:59 pm

Unlock
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#7

Postby baraka2 » Fri Jan 30, 2015 10:54 am

Hi Lisa, I suggest you find out the reason why you're acting this way. What makes you to keep a relationship with someone who doesn't treat you very well. It's quite destructive. So, dispite the fact to do things that make you feel good, you should look back at your history, your childhood, your past relationship, to find out what's going on. I know it's easy to say , but if you don't solve it, don't find the reason of your actions it'll probably come back in the future, maybe in different situations, but the same issue.
Be lucky.
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#8

Postby Beloved » Fri Jan 30, 2015 4:43 pm

Lisa! wrote:sometimes cut me dead for no good resean and spend his time talking to other girls

Sounds masochistic.

Is Anna Karenina your hero?
How 'bout Theresa Dunn from the movie, Looking for Mr. Goodbar?
How 'bout the woman in the elevator video who ended up marrying her football player fiance who routinely beats the daylights out of her?
And I guess OJ's ex-frau fits into this category.
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#9

Postby Candid » Fri Jan 30, 2015 10:42 pm

baraka2 wrote:Hi Lisa, I suggest you find out the reason why you're acting this way.


No sign of Lisa on the forum for more than two years. Guess she got the message and got a life!
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#10

Postby BlackPot » Mon Feb 16, 2015 1:53 am

Hi Lisa.

I have a good understanding of your situation, I had a few online relationships, one I thought at the time, rather serious.
But I also was the jerk that you so desire in that forum.
Him talking to other people is probably the reason he is in a forum, your attempted monopolization of his attention may be one reason he is becoming disinterested.
Take it back a notch, give him space.
A relationship is a relationship, and you can learn a lot about yourself, and the obstacles that you need to overcome in order to have healthy relationships, even from an online one, perhaps even more so.

if you seek long term companionship try to do so with someone who has a similar intention.
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#11

Postby DumSpiroSpero » Mon Feb 16, 2015 6:20 am

one thing i learn from my all pas relationships is, learn to step forward and not look back. Use this experience as a stepping stone to your next relationship and try not screw this again this time. at least you have an idea now how to talk to (well not in personal though) but you can apply it to a real situation next time. My advice is, learn not dwell too much over the net. Go out there and have some fun, miracles are waiting for you outside your house. You just need to grasp them.
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#12

Postby BlackPot » Mon Feb 16, 2015 1:43 pm

Right, no sign of Lisa.
I should have read that post.
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