I'm 29 and jealous of young girls...

Postby bigashley123 » Tue Jul 08, 2014 7:44 pm

I'm jealous of girls in their late teens to early 20s. Mostly because they have a bigger future ahead of them and the possibility to make better choices in life than I did

My jealousy is so bad that I try to monitor what I read and view online. Seeing articles about young girls going to prom, heading off to college, or getting married at 21/22 makes me feel incredibly jealous, inferior and sends me into a depression. I avoid anything related to teenagers or early 20s. I cant handle how inferior I feel.

I just saw a photo of Malia Obama and saw on thin, tall and pretty she was. Everyone was complimenting on how gorgeous and modely she looked. And how she'll have a wonderful future. And I just felt so envious. Im not as young or as thin as she is. And at my age I feel like its too late to get married or have a great career. She has a privileged life I was never afforded. I feel like crap and don't know how to get any self esteem or anything . what can I do?
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#1

Postby bigashley123 » Tue Jul 08, 2014 9:33 pm

I thought this place would help me. Guess not
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#2

Postby quietvoice » Wed Jul 09, 2014 11:46 am

bigashley123 wrote:I thought this place would help me. Guess not

Your reply was to a troll that finally is banned.
Please hang with the forum. I'm sure someone with an understanding of your situation will help out.
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#3

Postby laureat » Wed Jul 09, 2014 1:10 pm

Expectations that we have from ourselves sometimes are nonsense and leads us to nowhere,

There comes a time when we have to understand how to surrender, to give up on our expectations; so we can find inner peace and create a new story of life...

1. You accept yourself, accept who you are;
2. You start to create new story with trusting yourself you can do it


And from that point you dont feel uncomfortable, because of younger women, because you have accepted who you are

So your approach is more relaxed, more comfortable and this brings better results in life,
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#4

Postby Prettygirlslayer24 » Sun Jul 13, 2014 7:40 am

If you ate healthy, dieted and didnt waste life you would of been pretty still and had a nice boyfriend or husband by now but you didnt.
you didnt study either so your not important.
what do you want me to do about this situation? you said it yourself.. your jealous of girls jealous girls are horrible people. your clearly envious to the degree of being a HATER
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#5

Postby WonderGurl » Sun Jul 13, 2014 4:25 pm

Stop comparing yourself to other people and focus on what you can do to get where you want to be (remaining realistic and bearing in mind that time travel is currently not an option).

I'm 29 also, and I would never in a million years go back to my early twenties, to hell with that. I'm learning every day and moving towards what will make me even happier. If I was 20 again, I'd be 10 years further from where I am heading to.
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#6

Postby bigashley123 » Mon Jul 14, 2014 3:08 am

Prettygirlslayer24 wrote:If you ate healthy, dieted and didnt waste life you would of been pretty still and had a nice boyfriend or husband by now but you didnt.
you didnt study either so your not important.
what do you want me to do about this situation? you said it yourself.. your jealous of girls jealous girls are horrible people. your clearly envious to the degree of being a HATER

I do eat healthy and watch what I eat but it doesn't mean I look 16. I've aged since then and I don't look like a young teenage girl and I am jealous of girls who are. I am coming here for help. I don't want to feel this way but I can't help it
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#7

Postby FluffyPuffUnicorn » Mon Jul 14, 2014 7:21 am

You are not too old to do anything.

This concept is not something your mind is going to accept, I know because mine is the same way. When I was a teenager I thought it was too late to become a great anime/cartoon artist and now I realize that if I had kept up I would be good by now, and I realized that if I start again now in about 4 years or so I would be as good as I always wanted to be, but it still feels like it's too late.

My mind doesn't want to give up on giving up, because it's easy, and safe.

You have to get going what you want in life (I also feel like it's too late to get going on college), I would say "better late than never" but that doesn't fit here, because there is no late. But like I said, it will always feel too late.
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#8

Postby famethrowa » Sat Jul 26, 2014 12:40 pm

Comparing yourself to other people is a like entering a worm hole you can never get out of. There's always going to be people younger than you, just like there's always going to be people who are older than you and are probably jealous of your age at 29.

You're still young. You have so much time ahead, you just can't see it right now because of your way of thinking. I'd suggest finding some kind of mentor who you really relate to online and get deep into their program -- meditation, diet exercise etc.
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#9

Postby Alexander Ang » Sun Jul 27, 2014 12:48 pm

Hi there,

Welcome to the forum and thank you for your sharing.

Here I have some suggestion and ideas that can help you get started with.

1) Instead of focusing on what others are doing or how well they are doing, perhaps you can think about how you can improve yourself, become better, build your self-esteem again, getting prettier than ever before and so on. You will be living a much awesome life that way.

2) Feel and acknowledge your accomplishment - this is to build up your self-esteem. Go sign up for classes, be it dancing classes, swimming lessons, music lessons or any other classes that you like to do. When you learn and master something, you will be feeling more fulfilled and confident in your personal life.

3) Change your limiting belief like " I'm too old, I'm not qualified, I got no experience etc..". If others can do it, so can you. If you study how successful become successful, you will know that age, qualification, experience, appearances, is not the determining factor to become successful in any area of a person's life.

Final thought - Your past does not equals your future. Your future depends on what do you do today, that's why it is call "Persent".

I believe in you and I know you can do this. Cheers! ;)
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#10

Postby joedalio » Mon Jul 28, 2014 2:19 am

Every bit of personal development advice I read lately keeps telling me the same thing...focus on the present moment. It doesn't matter how young or old you are. If you focus on what you can do NOW, you exponentially increase the power you have in your life. This is because you are not dwelling on past mistakes and not worrying about what might happen in the future.

Also, as others have mentioned, focus on you...on being the best you that you can be. Perfect? Impossible for all of us. Be your best now, and watch how quickly many of your negative thoughts disappear :)
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#11

Postby QueenBeauty? » Thu Jul 31, 2014 7:16 am

You know...there isn't a bif difference between 29 and 20. You won't really change facially you can still pass for your early twenties. Don't be jealous because a lot of stupid young girls want to grown up fast and want to be your age because they think it will be cool. You don't have to envy them, you are you and they are them. Jealousy is a poison that causes danger.
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#12

Postby AA7 » Sat Aug 02, 2014 11:34 pm

My dear, love yourself as you are! I'm a grandmother now, and when I look in the mirror I sometimes wonder who that is, looking back at me,,,,, but in my heart, I am still ME,,,, and I still feel very young at heart! As I mature gracefully, I look back at the preceding decades, and feel thankful that they are behind me!!! I've raised a large family, and am very proud of my kids, I've succeeded in my career and look forward to early retirement. I eat healthily, take care of myself emotionally and psychologically through energy work and meditation. I feel better than ever!! Stay positive. Embrace life. Be proud of who you are, and if you are not already proud of that person, you must make changes so that you do feel proud of yourself. It's never too late to make changes.

Wishing you well.
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#13

Postby TheCarpenter » Sat Aug 09, 2014 4:24 am

love yourself. don't compare yourself to others. you have your own life to live with, love what you have now. dream and make plan on what you want to achieve in the future. draw a boundary line between what you can do and some fairy tail stuff that truly out of your line. bottomline is, respect yourselves. good luck to you.
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#14

Postby jeremy_me » Tue Aug 26, 2014 12:05 am

instead of getting jealous over and over again, why don't you just enjoy your youth right now. You are keeping your self esteem low. Enjoy what you have right now and be grateful.
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