Stay strong during the Holidays! 6 1/2 years clean!

[biggiesize]

Hello friends....New and old.Ijust wanted to give my yearly reminder to everyone,especially the new quitters,to not let the holidays get the best of you.I know you will be around friends and the possibilities of taking just "1 toke" or having just "1 sip" will be readily available to you.It may seem like fun at the moment,but the next day you will most likely go through the conversation with yourself that all of us have had at some point about not being strong enough to quit or feeling like you will never beat your demons.Its not worth it for a little holiday celebration!Be strong and carry on! You will feel amazing when you wake up on January 1st and actually remember you Christmas and New year.Merry christmas!
-Biggie

[endofdelta9]

Thank you biggiesize

[greener pastures]

Thank you, you are so right.

[therebirth]

Thanks Biggiesize, you are like our Dad here lol. I remember myself last christmas.. worst christmas holiday of my life. Constant derealization with all those symptoms and nothing felt real. I might not be 100% recovered, but I am miles from where I was a year ago. i'm 1.5 years in now and hoping to see more improvements. Happy holidays to everyone on the forum.

[lynne66]

Thanks, biggiezie! You know I wanted to add too that many unconscious things can come up around the holidays as well. I know for me that holidays where always painful times after my parents were divorced when I was 11. I remember my drunk dad driving me to my mother's house late on Christmas Eve night where there was a step-father who never liked me around because he needed ALL of my mother's attention (had his own issues.) Every year it would happen like this though my mother would say that it wouldn't happen again. Why not just drive me the next morning? Geeze. And now with a family split apart and no family of my own I am never invited to be with my dad on Christmas, which is also his birthday, though they go and see my half-brothers. Every year I feel a lot of pain over this and have spent many holidays alone due to distance in miles with my mom, though this year she will be down to visit me. But don't underestimate the residual pain that lives in the psyche to come up in some way and potentially cause a slip. I have noticed myself really wanting to slip up on some way around now and I know some of it is old holiday trauma and that it will pass. Not everyone gets a lot out of the holidays when they either can't be around family or have to be around family who are dysfunctional.

[netty28661]

Great post biggiesize!!

Lynne, I really feel for you & can see why the holiday break will be difficult. I know you're still finding it hard but please please stay strong & just get through the holiday - you will realise you can do it & be proud of yourself!

Jannette

[endofdelta9]

thank you Jannette for your much needed encouragement

[endofdelta9]

also thank you Jannette for the recommendation of the Book Steven M. Melemis it is excellent and helpful

[netty28661]

hi endofdelta, thanks for that!

That book was a definate turning point in the quitting process for me, I probably read it after being clean 10 months or so & was desperate to feel "normal" again, but I was far from that point. He explains in the book that it can take up to 2 years to feel "normal", whilst at first I found the thought damned depressing, I also tried to start accepting that it might take that long. After the 12 month point I felt massively better, but it did take 2 years. I still have episodes of anxiety but find excercise & regular meditating helps enormously & I feel fantastic.

It can be done.
jannette

[endofdelta9]

it means the world that you come back and help us all
yes exercise and meditation is very helpful i am long term meditator and like you said it helps enormously .

thank you so much

it can be done i will hold on to this