after 7 days i can stop my cravings

#60

Postby Bevano84 » Fri Apr 17, 2015 9:52 pm

Good for you mate... won't be wanted that smoke now... pity you mist the scan!!!

Well he/she will be here before you know it...

I wish I'd of had that first year of my life with my son sober... still been amazing though. Just that feeling of loving someone tens times more than you ever thought possible. It's the making of so many men.

Pacemaker?
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#61

Postby Ade,wales » Sat Apr 18, 2015 9:00 am

ye mate i cant wait, supposed to be a girl

drugs for keeping a stable rhythm, then i can have my heart burnt in a couple months to make a scar and be drug free.

think i'll go for the burning
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#62

Postby Wave » Sun Apr 19, 2015 6:38 am

Ade, this all sounds pretty full on. Hope you are coping OK! The racing heart doesn't sound good but at least you have good docs finding the cause and I hope this solves the problem.

How many days you gone without weed now?
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#63

Postby Ade,wales » Sun Apr 19, 2015 11:36 am

thanks wave, hopefully things are sorted now.

104 days now, never going back
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#64

Postby Wave » Sun Apr 19, 2015 12:03 pm

Awesome to hear, just be careful as the 3 month mark seems to be when a lot of people fail. Great to hear you aren't tempted as some serious challenges presented themselves in your life!!
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#65

Postby Ade,wales » Fri Apr 24, 2015 7:12 pm

think i found out something about addictions recently.gonna try to explain

i've smoked fags for as long as i smoked weed, about 25 years. when stopping the weed it helped to smoke the fags as it was like having a spliff but without the buzz. almost a spliff substitute.

i just went into hospital for 2 weeks and they dont like u smoking in there. so i had no choice and got some nicotine chewing gum which took the cravings away to a degree. and i was ok with that. now and again, maybe once a day, i would think really need a fag now. but knew i couldnt so had a chewing gum. not the same as smoking but kinda sorted my head out enough to not go mental. as the 2 weeks went, felt less and less like i needed that smoke

and heres where it goes a bit weird

they told me i could go home, by now i was happy not smoking and could cope easily with the chewing gum. my dad came to pick me up and we started the 2 hour drive home. i started thinking i can do what i want now - have some beers, eat when i wanted, go outside etc. i also thought if i want i could have a fag (i knew there was some in my van since the day i was taken into hospital), from then on i really craved smoking again.

i was happy to be home so that kinda distracted me a bit. but the next day, being in familiar surroundings where i would normally smoke, made me want to a hell of a lot more. i had gotten over the worst of giving up, the first couple of weeks, but now i was dying for a fag. got to admit i gave in and had one, which was horrible and gave me the reminder that it is a waste of time smoking.

my point being with this addiction, when i knew i couldnt, my craving was less even tho it should have been more cos it was the start of giving up, but when after two weeks i could smoke againg i really wanted to. this goes to show, for me anyway, it is all in your head. of course there are physical aspects of withdrawal, but if u really want to stop something, willpower is all u need, brainwasshing yourself into thinking that u cant smoke again. and not giving in

i've had two fags in three weeks, vaping a lot, but think i can say i've given up those horrible cancer sticks

anyone wanting to give up cigarettes, ecigs definitely make it a hell of a lot easier. give it a go
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#66

Postby Wave » Mon Apr 27, 2015 3:05 am

Yes this weed quit is easier due to only went back to vaping and feel its a really great "first step" before stopping completely, also a lot better for you (not good for you though!!)

Hope you are staying strong and medically things are ok!
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#67

Postby Ade,wales » Thu May 07, 2015 9:09 pm

4 months now.

very occasionally get the thought, be cool to get wrecked.
even though i've spent 20 years doing it and know it does me no good.
feel like i'm missing out, think i can just have the one session.
but know deep down it would be a very stupid thing to do.
but the evil part of my mind keeps trying to convince me.

but it won't win
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#68

Postby Bevano84 » Sat May 09, 2015 8:47 am

Boyo is doing well.

When you get the cravings what is your thought process of stopping yourself now?

I think things are changing for me as I now drive my ambitions to stop for the positive changes, not thinking I need to but life will be of a lower standard. Just escaping the brainwashing I guess.

Well done to you mate!!
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#69

Postby Wave » Sat May 09, 2015 8:50 am

4 months is really not a long way from 6 months!! How do you feel wishing yourself in terms if mood?

I mentioned in my thread I get quite intense at points and find it hard to stay calm in stressful situations, have you found your ability to stay calm better now your 4 months in?
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#70

Postby Ade,wales » Sat May 09, 2015 7:57 pm

bevano - i guess when i get a craving, physically/logistically i would have to go and score which would take ages and the missus would know and go mental. if i had some close at hand i think it would be easy to sneak some in now and again, so i dont. so the time delay and aggro stops me. but more importantly i think to myself - if i smoke again i'm going back to the mental fog, not giving a s**t about anything, hiding away cos i'm stoned, no drive, complacent, putting things off etc etc. i been there so i know wot i'm like when using and can't do it no more.

a lot of people on this forum have said 'you know when you've had your last spliff', and i know i have. i think you need that, the WANT to not smoke anymore. then it's a lot easier. i have brainwashed myself. when i think i would like to get stoned now, my brainwashed mind automatically says - you can't. and thats it. it's only a desire, which you can stop. you can.

wave-ye 6 months seems quite close, but an infinity when i first stopped. i have had major mood swings/anger eruptions/psycho feelings/down in the dumps. found it hard to know wots going on in my head, whether its just normal stuff or because of the PAWS.to be honest, at times i've been fu**ing crazy.( i haven't put on this forum about going into the police station and screaming like f*ck at a couple of officers and running out, a story for another time). but just riding it out. hoping one day i'm gonna just suddenly think - i'm good now.

one day i'll get there

bring on that day
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#71

Postby Wave » Sat May 09, 2015 10:27 pm

Yea I can relate with that, well not the story you mention (**** that!!) but cant stop over analysing stuff and make myself feel proper sh** and feel there have been points of extreme paranoia, worse than a bad weed smoke/vape.

I totally agree with you that once you actually want to stop getting high, it is a lot easier. I don't crave weed in the same way I did last quit, at points I wish I could think in a logical way or chill more but overall feeling some benefits, sometimes.

Just need to hit the exercise and know when I get that sorted it will be much easier.
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#72

Postby Ade,wales » Sat May 16, 2015 4:26 pm

wave - know wot u mean about over analysing stuff, i do that, but maybe i always have and thats just me.
over the last few years i've been through a lot of emotional s**t, the lowest about 2 years ago where i ended up in the doctors being told i was severely depressed. didnt want to take medicine so just pushed thru. had lots of stressful things happen.since then giving up the weed, heart attack s**t, baby almost here, skint and finding work been hard, just given up fags, visa for wife boll***s.
with all that dont really know wot the f**ks going on in my head and cant properly say wot stopping weed has done to me. but i'm sure its done me good not bad.
just keep pushing forward is all we can do
thinking of the now and wot could be
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#73

Postby Ade,wales » Sat May 16, 2015 7:14 pm

just read bevanos post from when i first joined. seems like it was years ago.
and i can see how mental i was and how things are different now compared to then.
the changes i've gone thru, and am probably still going thru.
when will it end
other people saying 2 years i thought was crazy, but now thinking maybe
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#74

Postby Ade,wales » Mon Jun 15, 2015 1:47 pm

Been a while. Had lots going on

June 11 at 2.16pm my wife gave birth to our little baby girl

So glad I'm not a semi conscious stoner anymore
Wouldn't want to miss (or forget) a minute of this

My life has been changed in a big way (for the better) twice this year already
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